The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

Topless Supermodel Lindsay Ellingson Really Wants You to Hit My Tip Jar

Posted on | September 23, 2011 | 18 Comments

Some readers expressed skepticism when I told you Kate Upton in her underwear wanted you to hit Ace’s tip jar. Skeptics asked, “How do you know what Kate Upton wants?” Trust me: I just know these things, OK?

Nevertheless, the same cynical reaction is likely when I tell you that Victoria’s Secret supermodel Lindsay Ellingson (pictured above, in a topless bikini) wants you to throw $10 or $20 in my tip-jar.

“Wait a minute, McCain — you never even heard of this chick until Donald Douglas at American Power blogged about her! So how the heck did you get the idea she wants us to hit your tip jar?” Because it’s my job to know what international supermodels want, that’s how.

 

And I’m starting to get offended by mere amateurs doubting the professional expertise of The Supermodel Whisperer™.

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Category: Rule 5

Comments

  • http://twitter.com/AmPowerBlog Donald Douglas

    Way to work it, McCain!!

  • FenelonSpoke

    A topless bikini? From what I can judge from the pictures it doesn’t look like she had any breasts worth covering. Nice face, though

  • TerryG

    Very nice face, but you’re gonna have to do better than a stick figure.

  • Velociman

    I think that is 11-year-old Joey Davenport from Smut Eye, Alabama, wearing his mother’s wig. I salute your concept, however.

  • Anonymous

    Sigh.

    Look, the people who decide who gets to be an International Supermodel aren’t seeking my advice, OK? So if they pick flat-chested beanpoles, don’t blame me.

    Just go ahead and Google up some Ashley Sage Ellison, and if your wife catches you, don’t tell your her where you got that idea. I’m trying to be helpful, to assist you in breaking your addiction to super-size funbags, which is why you should hit the tip jar.

    But expecting gratitude for my humanitarian philanthropy was probably naive . . .

  • Bushwackca

    I’d hit the tip jar if you promised to buy that chick a cheeseburger or something… dang. Honey could hoola hoop with a cheerio…

  • http://thecampofthesaints.org Bob Belvedere

    Trust me: I just know these things, OK?

    I, for one, have no doubt: http://thecampofthesaints.org/2011/07/01/rule-5-news-exclusive-stacy-mccain-and-salma-hayek-secret-lovers/

    Stacy McCain: You Can Trust Me; I’m Not Like The Others

  • http://thecampofthesaints.org Bob Belvedere

    Hey, Mr. Hayek: There’s nothing wrong with large breastises if they’re not pneumatically-enhanced ones!

  • http://thecampofthesaints.org Bob Belvedere

    She needs a hungry-man breakfast, followed by some BBQ.

  • Anonymous

    Do you think Ashley Sage Ellison has been pneumatically enhanced? Or have you not yet conducted sufficient research to make such a judgment?

  • Anonymous

    Can we split the difference between Ellingson and Ellison? Roughly speaking, that gives us Elle Woods.     

  • herddog505

    I know.  Pretty girl, but she needs to lay off the heroin and have a sandwich.  Or two.  Or three.

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  • http://thecampofthesaints.org Bob Belvedere

    Dr. Clyde ‘Fingers’ Proctor is on the case.

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