The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

Ooh! Another Atheist Sex Scandal?

Posted on | August 6, 2013 | 256 Comments

Karen Stoltznow and Ben Radford at a December 2012 conference.

You may recall that in 2011 Rebecca Watson — the total smokin’ hotness of atheist chickdom — celebrated her victimhood after some guy tried to hit on her at an atheist conference. The silliness of it all prompted Vox Day to comment on the misery of atheist guys:

No wonder they’re so furious at God. He created all those lovely women with those beautiful breasts and they aren’t even allowed to even talk to them.

Basically, atheism seems to attract a lot of game-deficient Gamma dudes who figure atheist chicks are easy (correct), but then presume this might mean some hot action for Gammas (incorrect).

OK, so fast-forward, and the New Total Smokin’ Hotness of Atheist Chickdom, Karen Stoltznow steps forward to tell her tale:

Sexual harassment is an uncomfortable topic to discuss with colleagues, especially when you’re the victim. . . .

(As if it is easy for the guy she accuses to discuss it.)

According to gossip about me, I gave him mixed-signals, I led him on, I’m flirtatious, and I’m a dirty little slut. . . .

(Is this true? I mean, was it only “gossip”?)

Five months after I lodged my complaint I received a letter that was riddled with legalese but acknowledged the guilt of this individual. They had found evidence of “inappropriate communications” and “inappropriate” conduct at conferences. . . . They assured me they were disciplining the harasser but this turned out to be a mere slap on the wrist. . . .

(He wasn’t burned at the stake.)

Those who didn’t know the extent of the harassment reacted as though we simply don’t play well together in the sandbox. “Why don’t you two just get over it and move on!” The matter was misconstrued as a lover’s tiff, or that we were a couple in an on again, off again relationship. . . .

(Were you ever a “couple” at all?)

To some people the news didn’t come as much of a surprise. They “knew” there was something wrong, especially with the benefit of hindsight. “I thought something was up when you two stopped working together.” Others felt they could finally admit to me what they think about him. “I never liked him.” “I’ve always thought he was a creepy guy!”, “He’s a weirdo!” and, “I unfriended him on Facebook because of the sexist shit he says and the perverted stuff he posts.” One woman confessed, “No wonder my female friends roll their eyes at me when I tell them he’s single!” . . .

(OK, I’ll stipulate this guy is creepy. But you have not yet told us whether you were ever in a “couple” with him, or explained why people may have thought you were.)

This man is a predator who collects girls of a certain “type”. His targets are chubby, shy, lonely, and insecure, just like I used to be.

(Oh. You used to be his “type,” but now you’re the Total Smokin’ Hotness of Atheist Chickdom, and so — under the bus!)

In the early days I looked up to him and was flattered that he seemed to respect my work. I quickly spotted some red flags but I disregarded them. These became too big to ignore, so I called it all off. The rejection was ego shattering to him at first, and then met with disbelief.

(Hell hath no fury like a Gamma dumped.)

This was followed by incessant communication of a sexual nature, including gifts, calls, emails, letters, postcards, and invites to vacation with him in exotic places so we could “get to know each other again”. He wouldn’t leave me alone. This wasn’t love. It was obsession. His desperation only increased when I met another man. He continued his harassment as though my boyfriend (who is now my husband) didn’t even exist.

(Excuse me for interrupting again — now we’re getting to the good part — but why not have your boyfriend tell the creep to buzz off?)

From late 2009 onwards I made repeated requests for his personal communication to cease but these were ignored. He began manipulating the boundaries by contacting me on the pretext of it being work-related. Then came the quid pro quo harassment. He would find opportunities for me within the company and recommend me to television producers, but only if I was nicer to him. One day the company offered me an honorary position that I’d worked hard for, but he warned me that he had the power to thwart that offer. I threatened to complain to his employer, but he bragged that another woman had accused him of sexual harassment previously and her complaints were ignored. According to him, she had been declared “batshit crazy”. Then, he saw me at conferences and took every opportunity to place me in a vulnerable position. This is where the psychological abuse turned physical and he sexually assaulted me on several occasions.

“Officer, arrest that man!”

Well, isn’t that what you think Karen Stoltznow would have done? If somebody “sexually assaulted” you, wouldn’t you call the cops?

For some reason, she didn’t, but instead complained to her employer, who gave her sort of a runaround, and she published her account without ever naming her harasser. But it seems everybody in Atheist World knows this creep, and his modus operandi is not exactly a secret, so arch-Darwinist P.Z. Myers outs him:

Something strange happened after I posted this. People started emailing me. They all said the same thing: they knew exactly who the harasser was, and they named him, and eerily, they all named exactly the same name, and they were all 100% on the money. I’m starting to believe in psychic powers.
The accused harasser was Ben Radford.
Wait. Maybe it’s not psychic powers, it’s privileged ignorance. Almost all of the people writing to me are women, and some of them also tell tales of their husbands or boyfriends not believing them at first.

Great: “Benjamin Radford is deputy editor of Skeptical Inquirer science magazine and a Research Fellow with the non-profit educational organization the Committee for Skeptical Inquiry,” and he is also apparently “a predator who collects girls … [who] are chubby, shy, lonely, and insecure.”

Sorry about your reputation, Mr. Creepy Obsessive Stalker.

Perhaps you can tell us why people thought you and Karen Stoltznow were a “couple” and what those “sexual assaults” were about.

Have a nice day. And good luck praying to nothing.

UPDATE: I Tweeted this post to the attention of some atheists, and set of World War III. Also, I find myself accused in the comments of “blaming the victim,” whereas my point generally was that atheist guys are creeps, and no woman is safe around them. Attending an atheist conference is kind of like having a sleepover with Julian Assange, it seems, but let’s not revisit that controversy just now, eh?

UPDATE II: A feminist blog comments:

As other atheist feminists might be unable to forget, Center For Inquiry is a fairly large skeptic notprofit which came under fire after CEO Ron Lindsay made some pretty thoughtless comments during his “welcoming” address at the Women In Secularism 2 conference held in DC this past Spring. CFI still hasn’t apologized or taken action against Lindsay. Here’s to hoping they have something more to say now that we know they’ve been doling out honoraria to an individual accused of spending 4 years making an equally famous female skeptic’s life a living hell.

So, it’s all-misogyny, all-the time with these guys, and you might think this would cause some of these “atheist feminists” to reconsider their worldview, go to church and fix me a sammich.

But no. Once they go atheist feminist, they never go back . . .

Or something. Rebecca Watson denounced the Center For Inquiry this year, because those atheist men are all hateful misogynists.

This means no more sammiches for you atheist guys, either.

And next? I guess there will be Atheist Lesbian Feminists conference, which then will split into Maoist and Stalinist sects, followed by the rise of a genuinely radical Underground Atheist Feminist terrorist group, blowing up shit and issuing jargon-laden manifestos.

The progress of such tendencies always follows a historical pattern.

 

Comments

256 Responses to “Ooh! Another Atheist Sex Scandal?”

  1. Joe Dokes
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:10 pm

    Whoever “Sally” is, he/she has grown desperate and is now a waste of time. Have fun with him/her.

  2. Dianna Deeley
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:11 pm

    Now, now! She’s a well-intentioned, if thoroughly propagandized, interlocutor. We are here to teach, not to cause her to fail to listen because she’s feeling attacked.

  3. Joe Dokes
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:11 pm

    She was already not listening.

  4. Skepticat_UK
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:12 pm

    I understand your need to believe this. However, it is categorically untrue. I don’t intend to discuss my personal morality any further on this website.

  5. Dianna Deeley
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:12 pm

    She might, though.

    Reason is a powerful weapon, especially if you convince the other person to use her reason.

  6. Joe Dokes
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:13 pm

    Know any good atheist charities that clothe and feed and shod the poor in the name of atheism, all with their own money (not taxpayer money)?

    Me either.

    There’s a reason for that.

  7. Joe Dokes
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:14 pm

    Have at it, but it looks like she’s bailing out on the moral front. You may want to concentrate fire on that, it’s her (and all atheists’) weak spot.

  8. Hanzo
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:14 pm

    Good for you. You should know the answers to your own infantile posts then, as Judaism is the predecessor of Christianity.

  9. sally
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:16 pm

    Hitler was no atheist, he clearly believed in a god, and he pushed for “Positive Christianity”

  10. Hanzo
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:16 pm

    Then why did Jesus invoke us to strive to be perfect, as His Father is in heaven?
    Narrow is the path, and fewer still are they who follow. Even those who profess to be Christians.

  11. DaveP.
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:17 pm

    You really don’t know much about old Adolf, do you? Are you just making this up as you go along?
    What does that say about the nature of your belief, if you have to struggle so hard to defend it against a bunch of Christians?

  12. Joe Dokes
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:17 pm

    Meaning, Christianity gutted of all Biblical weight and refilled with pagan Germanic myth, which is neither positive nor Christianity.

    Next.

  13. Hanzo
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:18 pm

    It would appear not. What with the pogroms of the great atheist utopia of the former USSR, and the killing fields of Cambodia, and China. All great communist, atheistic “society’s”, at least in the power structure.

  14. Dianna Deeley
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:19 pm

    I think you are making it up as you go along; as distasteful as it is, please open your copy of Mein Kampf to the page where Adolf Hitler praises Christianity.

    If you say you do not have a copy, I recommend you again deploy your demonstrated Google-fu.

  15. Joe Dokes
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:20 pm

    I’ve met your Messiah. He’s wonderful!

  16. sally
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:21 pm

    The NT is filled with anti-Jewish defamation, blaming us for the death of Jesus, saying we’re “blind”, “liars”, and that our beliefs are outdated. You should read some of the nasty things the early church fathers wrote about Jews. Even Martin Luther, the father of protestantism, (which I bet you form part of) was an antisemite.

  17. sally
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:23 pm

    I don’t know who you’re talking about, since the Messiah is yet to come. If you are thinking about Jesus, you should read this:

    http://www.aish.com/jw/s/48892792.html

  18. Joe Dokes
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:24 pm

    The Jews did demand His death.

  19. Dianna Deeley
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:24 pm

    Cite. Again, you don’t get to just spout things like that.

    In his “table talk”, Hitler clearly avows his atheism and declares that the Germans should have converted to a “warrior religion” such as Islam.

    There is an internet archive, based on the careful work of Trevor-Roper.

    Here is the address: http://www.archive.org/stream/HitlersTableTalk/HitlersTableTalk_djvu.txt

    I grant it is a large file.

    If you come back with the first page of Belief.net, I will be deeply disappointed in you.

  20. sally
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:26 pm

    Christianity has as much to do with Judaism as Mormonism.

  21. Dianna Deeley
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:28 pm

    Mormonism is not being discussed, and neither, really, is Christianity.

  22. Dianna Deeley
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:32 pm

    All right, somehow or other, we’ve managed to more than double the number of comments on this thread when I dipped into it a couple hours ago to see what had been said about the story, and not advanced it one step. So I’m dropping out now.

  23. sally
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:33 pm

    If you believe church propaganda written decades after the supposed existence of Jesus.

  24. sally
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:35 pm

    As if Christianity isn’t filled with pagan myth.

  25. Skepticat_UK
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:39 pm

    No, that’s OK. One reading was enough to suggest that it is very word ‘atheist’ that provokes anger in a few of the commenters here, rather than anything those particular atheists have said and done. But thanks for the offer. 🙂

  26. Joe Dokes
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:42 pm

    I suspect this will be nonsense to you but allow me to share it anyway.

    I was not raised in a particularly religious home. No regular services of any kind, ever…sporadic, maybe once every few years early on, then by the time I was a teen, nothing.

    But something about the message of Christ drew me…I didn’t know all the details but what I did hear and understand was intriguing. But it had nothing to do with any influence in my home life or upbringing.

    As an adult who had resisted Christ and my own conscience for many years, instead indulging in nearly every sin you can name, I finally came to Him, heavy with the weight of my sin and the toll it was taking in my life, and the nameless sense of condemnation that hung over me constantly.

    Long story short: He forgave me, as He promised. I knew there were things – a few things – about myself that needed changing for the better but He changed things I did not think needed changing and DIDN’T WANT changed. That was wholly unexpected.

    For me, that is proof (though I have others you would likely dismiss were I to share them) that Christ is real and indwells me, just as the Bible promises.

    My point is this. If there is even one atom of your being that is open to the possibility that He is your Messiah, all you need do is quietly, in the silence of your own mind and hear, ASK Him to show you your sin as He sees it, and to save you from it. Both of which He will do – I guarantee you He will, but only if your willing to actually, honestly question what you now believe.

  27. Dianna Deeley
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:47 pm

    Er, yes? What did I say that in any way contradicted that? Oh, heck, never mind. I can’t keep track of who said what or why, on this thread, any longer.

  28. Skepticat_UK
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:47 pm

    Wow, I’m really feeling the love here! Thank you so much for that illustration of how you all think – it really demonstrates the superiority of your belief system. Not.

    If you are open minded enough to find out what humanists like myself actually think, I suggest you visit the Think Humanism website.

    Time for bed across the pond. Night all. 🙂

  29. sally
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:51 pm

    Question what my people have believed for thousands of years and accept something heretical to my religion? No thanks.

  30. Joe Dokes
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:55 pm

    I’m just a Gentile dog. But many other Jews have come to Messiah, as you know. Have you ever read their testimonies? Have you ever open-mindedly examined WHY they made such a life-changing choice, knowing they’d be written off forever as dead by their families and friends? Have you ever even thought to ask that question, at give them a fair hearing on the matters you here condemn?

  31. sally
    August 7th, 2013 @ 6:56 pm

    Hitler may or not have been a Christian but most people in Germany were, and they justified their antisemitism using the Bible.

  32. Hanzo
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:01 pm

    Wow. Wow. Historically challenged, much? Although, it’s Judaism that has to do with Christianity, not the other way around.

  33. Joe Dokes
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:02 pm

    Flavius Josephus for you on line 2.

  34. sally
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:03 pm

    There are also several Messianics and “Jews for Jesus” who realized Jesus was not who they believed he was and returned to real Judaism. That some Jews with no prior religious education thought Jesus was the messiah changes nothing, just like the golden calf and all the other false messiahs that have come and gone.

  35. Hanzo
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:04 pm

    Haha. Sorry, I misinterpreted part of your post. 🙂

  36. Joe Dokes
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:04 pm

    There are people who have abandoned Christianity and Judaism, too. It proves nothing to the question I asked, which I asked again. Have you actually read testimonies of those Jews who have come to Christ? Would you if you could?

    PS A pharisee by the name of Saul was taught by Gamaliel. He came to Christ.

  37. Dianna Deeley
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:05 pm

    Flag on the play! I call moving the goalposts!

  38. RS
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:05 pm

    I cannot believe you don’t see Dawkins’ philosophy. Read the God Delusion.

  39. Joe Dokes
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:06 pm

    Yep, two yard penalty for unsportsmanlike conduct.

  40. sally
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:09 pm

    More like “Christ” came from him. Paul was responsible for Christianity as you know it. You should know why he’s not very popular among Jews.

  41. RS
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:11 pm

    You obviously don’t understand what transcendent means. In fact your reference to religious people who act contrary to a transcendent morality only proves those individuals are immoral. It says nothing about the origins of morality.

  42. Joe Dokes
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:12 pm

    So will you read testimonies?

  43. sally
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:17 pm

    Will you read the link I gave you above dealing with the messiah?

  44. Joe Dokes
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:23 pm

    It’s rude to answer a question with a question, especially when it’s been politely repeated to you. I guess your answer is “no.” Okay.

  45. Dianna Deeley
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:40 pm

    I still should have had a little humility, and pointed out that those most likely to resist Hitler and risk their lives for their Jewish, Romany, gay and wrong-flavor-socialist neighbors were usually religious and religiously motivated. Most being specifically Christian.

  46. Joe Dokes
    August 7th, 2013 @ 7:44 pm

    Corrie Ten Boom and Bonhoeffer being only two that I recall off the top of my head. I doubt Sally would bother reading anything they wrote, either.

  47. Dianna Deeley
    August 7th, 2013 @ 8:08 pm

    You are, as a Jew, entitled to be skeptical of Christianity. Further, you are entitled to reject it, unexamined.

    What you are not entitled to do is condemn Christianity, using fallacious reasoning.

  48. Bill Nye the Science Guy: Harasser? : The Other McCain
    August 8th, 2013 @ 12:42 pm

    […] the wake of the atheist sex scandal we reported Tuesday, someone in the “skeptic” community (as these soi-dissant rationalists refer to them […]

  49. DocWashburn
    August 8th, 2013 @ 1:21 pm

    Ooh! Another Atheist Sex Scandal? http://t.co/leamKyYV1e

  50. justintempler
    August 9th, 2013 @ 1:41 am

    RT @rsmccain: Ooh! Another Atheist Sex Scandal? http://t.co/frgyqJCIwQ | | @karenstollznow @pzmyers @BTRadford @voxday @rebeccawatson