The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

And Now, Helpless Victim Bill Schmalfeldt Heroically Suffers Glorious Martyrdom

Posted on | February 21, 2013 | 41 Comments

Bill Schmalfeldt: Not cropped to ‘look positively demonic’

“Let’s talk about R.S. McCain, as well — Robert Stacy McCain. Here he writes column after column after column about me, in which he refers to me in the most defamatory ways, about being deranged . . . and he takes that picture of me that was taken several days after surgery . . . crops it to make me look positively demonic, and then when I ask him to denounce this death threat, I get a ‘don’t contact me’ e-mail back. Where’s your humanity?”
Bill Schmalfeldt, Feb. 20 podcast

“Stranahan would f–k you up the a– while picking your pocket, then wipe his d–k on your t-shirt.”
Bill Schmalfeldt, Feb. 11 on Twitter

Perhaps there is no need to point out the contrast between Schmalfeldt in attack mode and Schmalfeldt in victim mode. Da Tech Guy isn’t buying Schmalfeldt’s fainting-couch act:

Really, you have a guy on twitter with under 150 followers who has his tweets “protected” and people are trying to silence him? Who is actually going to pay money to silence somebody that nobody hears?

The demonstrable insignificance of Bill Schmalfeldt certainly provokes the question, “Why does anybody even notice him?” And the answer is, because of his relentless harassment, he requires attention — preferably, the attention of qualified professionals in the field of forensic psychology, but until such time as the profilers at Quantico take an interest, he’ll just have to settle for whatever attention he gets.

Most people have never had to deal with a deranged cyberstalker, and therefore have no idea what one obsessed kook can accomplish in terms of online harassment. Over Thanksgiving weekend, Schmalfeldt sent me more than 200 unsolicited harassing Twitter messages in the span of 48 hours, including threats to contact my wife.

This was relatively mild in comparison to the months of nearly constant harassment Schmalfeldt has directed at Lee Stranahan. Imagine the effect when Bill Schmalfeldt sends disturbingly obscene messages — dozens of them, scores of them — every day for weeks on end, directed at one person. And because Schmalfeldt cyberstalks his targets, obsessively monitoring their online activities, anyone publicly communicating with his targets is liable to be included as a CC recipient of these kinds of messages, as in this Tweet that Schmalfeldt CC’d to blogger John Hoge (click the image to enlarge):

Stranahan repeatedly asked Schmalfeldt to cease this behavior, but Schmalfeldt persisted, which is why Schmalfeldt was charged with online harassment last week, and this explanation from Aaron Walker really should not be necessary:

Folks, do I have to explain this to you? Well, in case I do, this is not the case of Lee Stranahan v. Bill Schmalfeldt. This is The State of Maryland v. Bill Schmalfeldt. . . .

Anyone familiar with stalking knows how difficult — indeed, perhaps sometimes impossible — it is to dislodge the stalker’s psychological fixation on the object of his obsession: Bill can’t help himself.

Thus the absurdity of Schmalfeldt claiming it is “defamatory” for me to describe him as “deranged.” His derangement is self-evident, and I have merely described it. When someone behaves in ways that are demonstrably crazy — and keep in mind that Schmalfeldt has been relentlessly harassing Lee Stranahan for months now — you don’t need an advanced degree in psychology, and are not at risk of being sued for libel, if you say they are daft, zany, bonkers, wacko, demented, warped, nuttier than squirrel farts and cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs.

 “The sky is blue,” according to the National Weather Service.

Now that Lee Stranahan has brought Bill Schmalfeldt’s dangerous craziness to the attention of authorities in Maryland, suddenly we are asked to believe that Schmalfeldt is a victim. Schmalfeldt accuses Stranahan of “inciting unstable people” (click the image to enlarge):

Lee Stranahan describes Schmalfeldt’s victim motif:

Bill Schmalfeldt has been predicting for days that my pointing out things he’s currently saying about me and family would create an atmosphere of hate. . . . And sure enough; his predictions came true as he’s gotten two mysterious threats that he is blaming on…me.
This is more harassment from Bill Schmalfeldt; a game of accuse the accuser.

“Accuse the accuser” is a tactic Schmalfeldt seems to have learned from his friends Brett Kimberlin and Neal Rauhauser, and if you suspect that this is not entirely coincidental, you’ll probably want to see where Schmalfeldt had a chat with his “buddy” Neal.

The charges against Bill Schmalfeldt are a matter of public record, and Schmalfeldt’s continuing harassment of Lee Stranahan is both (a) legitimate news, and (b) additional evidence.

Would you be surprised to learn that Schmalfeldt now claims to have proof that Stranahan was responsible for the death threats?

How amazing this is — not.

Part of the “accuse the accusers” game is the You Can’t Catch Me move that Neal Rauhauser has repeatedly employed: Using proxy trolls and sockpuppets to accomplish his purposes, then pretending innocence and claiming that anyone who suspects him of involvement is paranoid. Because you cannot prove that Neal did it (and keep in mind, Neal has written lengthy online treatises about methods of Internet deception), therefore your suspicion toward him is irrational — and thus evidence that you lack credibility.

Ah, but who laughs last? Little did Neal Rauhauser suspect the mind-blowing announcement that Lee Stranahan got his teeth fixed:

How will Bill Schmalfeldt explain to a neutral third party why topics like my teeth or my wife’s sex life are legally valid areas of obsession for him? I don’t know.

Stranahan’s prediction that the “haters will blow their gaskets” at that news was presented by Schmalfeldt as evidence that Stranahan had advance knowledge of the Twitter death threats against Schmalfeldt, and now the Heroic Victim of Glorious Martyrdom will have something new to explain to his handful of followers.







41 Responses to “And Now, Helpless Victim Bill Schmalfeldt Heroically Suffers Glorious Martyrdom”

  1. AnthonyAbides
    February 21st, 2013 @ 12:08 pm

    RT @smitty_one_each: TOM And Now, Helpless Victim Bill Schmalfeldt Heroically Suffers Glorious Martyrdom #TCOT

  2. Rob Crawford
    February 21st, 2013 @ 12:11 pm

    Holy crap. A knew I’d seen him before.

  3. McGehee
    February 21st, 2013 @ 12:29 pm

    He actually looks more human in the cropped picture. In the new one he looks like Jabba the Hutt’s second cousin forcibly removed.

  4. Finrod Felagund
    February 21st, 2013 @ 12:41 pm

    He reminds me strongly of a Buffy the Vampire Slayer villain named Balthazar:

    Balthazar was a morbidly obese demon unable to move and forced into a tank of liquid, where he was constantly kept moist by one of his minions.

  5. ThomasD
    February 21st, 2013 @ 1:02 pm

    Jabba the Hutt’s cojoined parasitic twin forcibly removed…

  6. matthew w
    February 21st, 2013 @ 1:06 pm

    DAMN !!!
    Please crop that photo !!

  7. McGehee
    February 21st, 2013 @ 1:10 pm

    But unaccountably not preserved in a jar of formaldehyde like most excised malignant growths.

  8. If a self-pitying attention whore that no one knows throws a pity party, will anyone come? « The Daley Gator
    February 21st, 2013 @ 1:12 pm

    […] Likely not, as Stacy McCain explains about the little internet troll that couldn’t […]

  9. Adjoran
    February 21st, 2013 @ 1:49 pm

    Describing Schmalfeldt as “deranged” IS defamatory – to every merely deranged person in the world.

  10. Adjoran
    February 21st, 2013 @ 1:50 pm

    How is this guy disabled? He could earn a living portraying the “Before” in Cialis commercials without any makeup. Giant Flaccid Schmalfeldt.

  11. Adjoran
    February 21st, 2013 @ 1:51 pm

    Send it to the Big Ten Commissioner as a warning.

  12. G Joubert
    February 21st, 2013 @ 1:54 pm

    Dude, get out of the chair and step away from the computer. No, do not head for the kitchen, instead go outside. Take a nice long walk. Do this several times a day everyday and your life will be much better. And probably everybody else’s too come to think about it.

  13. JeffWeimer
    February 21st, 2013 @ 2:02 pm
  14. McGehee
    February 21st, 2013 @ 2:11 pm

    The lives of innocent small children who see him, not so much.

  15. McGehee
    February 21st, 2013 @ 2:13 pm

    Morn is too nice a guy to be associated with the likes of Schmabba the Hutt. And even the Sontarans, evil as they are, have some redeeming qualities.

  16. AnonymousDrivel
    February 21st, 2013 @ 2:14 pm

    Do you even have enough RAM to load that image to crop?

    I denounce myself. Besides, if anyone’s offended, it was satire. Satire!

  17. jakee308
    February 21st, 2013 @ 2:15 pm

    He looks like Jabba the Hutt in a t-shirt.

  18. jakee308
    February 21st, 2013 @ 2:18 pm

    Sorry, didn’t read the comments before posting.My first thought exactly. An immature Jabba the Hutt (like before he’d really gotten into eating his enemies and anything else on hand.) but nevertheless, you can see what’s coming. He’s not winning the Biggest Loser anytime soon (except socially or legally).

  19. jakee308
    February 21st, 2013 @ 2:18 pm

    I think we’re in agreement that he’s Huttese.

  20. JeffWeimer
    February 21st, 2013 @ 2:23 pm

    I was thinking Morn as the pathetic loser forever consigned to the fringe of the everyday world.

  21. gloogle gloogle
    February 21st, 2013 @ 2:23 pm

    See, this is why I can’t visit Stacy’s blog less than 1 hour after a meal…

  22. Silver Whistle
    February 21st, 2013 @ 2:24 pm

    and he takes that picture of me that was taken several days after surgery

    Seems the asshole transplant was a success. There it is, in between his shoulders.

  23. ReaganiteRepublican
    February 21st, 2013 @ 2:28 pm

    One could describe this Weeble’s appearance as ‘blobular’

  24. rmnixondeceased
    February 21st, 2013 @ 2:46 pm

    Rather puts me in mind of Vogons, in both physical appearance and mindless idée fixe. …

  25. RosalindJ
    February 21st, 2013 @ 3:29 pm

    Positively demonic, negatively demonic. Works for me either way. The guy seems to not just like engaging in vicious keyboard practice. It’s his raison d’être.

  26. John Bradley
    February 21st, 2013 @ 4:08 pm

    I’m reminded of a question we all used to yell at the screen during many, many viewings of Rocky Horror Picture Show back in the ’70s: “Where’s your fucking neck?”

    I’d like to retroactively apologize to Charles Gray; I was young and foolish at the time, and had no idea how far necklessness could be taken…

  27. Rob Crawford
    February 21st, 2013 @ 4:18 pm

    And there are Sontarans with honor…

  28. Steve Skubinna
    February 21st, 2013 @ 5:24 pm

    That’s pretty cruel, in that by NOT cropping the photo you make him look like the president of the Special Class.

    Well, I guess he makes himself look like that. But you’re enabling.

  29. Bob Belvedere
    February 21st, 2013 @ 5:31 pm

    He could portray the cause of ED.

  30. Bob Belvedere
    February 21st, 2013 @ 5:33 pm

    I referenced that in a recent post on BS here and nobody got it!

  31. RichFader
    February 21st, 2013 @ 5:48 pm

    The problem with the other photo wasn’t that he looked demonic. The problem with the other photo was that he looked like a prison lifer about to sodomize his new cellmate. The uncropped photo would have made him look like a prison lifer about to sodomize his new cellmate, after winning a fight with another of the lifers over said cellmate.

    Now this photo looks like your friendly old Uncle Bill, who’s just so happy to see you. Especially because you just opened up the take-out container you brought him and showed him the breaded, deep-fried newborn.

  32. Consulting the Legal Department : The Other McCain
    February 21st, 2013 @ 7:01 pm

    […] previous observation that no one could be sued for libel for merely describing the self-evident fact of Bill Schmalfeldt’s derangment drew a mildly […]

  33. AdamantiumVorlon
    February 21st, 2013 @ 7:16 pm

    Is this photo a relative of Honey Boo Boo’s Mother?

  34. richard mcenroe
    February 21st, 2013 @ 7:55 pm

    I was thinking something out of “Hellraiser” myself. One of the later ones.

  35. richard mcenroe
    February 21st, 2013 @ 7:57 pm

    If he starts writing free verse, grab your towel and run.

  36. richard mcenroe
    February 21st, 2013 @ 7:58 pm

    Suddenly I feel svelte. This guy may not be much of a longterm problem. He’s probably about one keyboard tantrum away from an aneurysm.

  37. rmnixondeceased
    February 21st, 2013 @ 8:21 pm

    Too many were not even born then!

  38. rmnixondeceased
    February 21st, 2013 @ 8:22 pm

    Heh. More properly frigidity …

  39. Evi L. Bloggerlady
    February 21st, 2013 @ 8:52 pm

    He is a weird looking dude. He looks like an evil erasure.

  40. McGehee
    February 21st, 2013 @ 9:34 pm

    I got it, but didn’t want to admit it at the time.

  41. Adjoran
    February 22nd, 2013 @ 1:27 am

    An old friend used to say, “I enjoy long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.”