The Other McCain

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Wasn’t The Lemonade Sufficient Brew-Ha-Ha?

Posted on | August 9, 2010 | 21 Comments

by Smitty

First they came for the adorable daughters selling lemonade. Via BlogProf, the word that Julie Murphy can’t have a lemonade stand made a sweet, sticky splash in the dextrosphere over the weekend. $120 for an asinine ‘temporary restaurant license’? At the posted $0.50 a glass, the unfortunate kid has to give the first 240 glasses of lemonade to the government just for the privilege of a bureaucratic probing.
Frank J. came out a thoroughgoing apologist for the fascists:

Do you know what kinds of diseases can lurk inside improperly handled lemonade? No, you don’t. And neither do I. So obviously, that threat is so severe that medical scientists won’t even tell us about it so as not to create a panic. And do you know how many people died from contaminated lemonade before stringent health regulations were enforced? I’ll give you a number: 52,143,000. Well, the number of people who died from improperly handled lemonade involves one or more digits from that number.

Scary, isn’t it? That stupid little girl could have killed half of Oregon. Luckily the government was there to protect you. But the damage isn’t just limited to people’s health; there’s also the economic impact. She goes out there with her non-union labor selling lemonade for 50 cents, and who knows how many proper businesses that paid all their licensing fees and taxes she was undercutting? She was effectively stealing money from Oregon and the federal government. Thus while President Obama is working very carefully to revive our economy, she is working directly against him. That probably also makes her a racist.

Not content with that outrage, the State of Beaver Fever decided to double down and suds up:

When the 2010 Oregon State Fair opens on Aug. 27, there won’t be an amateur beer-brewers competition for the first time in 22 years.

An overlooked, 80-year-old statute that says Oregon home-brewed beer can’t leave the home has forced fair organizers to cancel the competition, which had 335 entrants last year, says Oregon Liquor Control Commission spokeswoman Christie Scott.

Brewers were reminded of the statute after the Oregon Department of Justice clarified the law for a pub seeking to serve home brew at an event, Scott says. “As long as this is the law, we have to enforce it,” she says, adding that the commission hopes to see the statute changed in time for the 2011 fair.

Now, if the ODoJ had merely contacted “Nation of Cowards” Holder, they could have found out that, as long as the beer is transported by illegal aliens (because transporting illegal beer is a job Americans won’t do), then the grand tradition of ignoring laws like they were the 10th Amendment can be merrily continued.

WTF happened to Oregon? I was born there a couple score years back. That State grows enough marijuana to outlast WJ Clinton’s famous ability to eschew inhalation. Portland had been called the microbrew capital of the US. Now they’re as humorless as a Barack Obama speech.

Comments

21 Responses to “Wasn’t The Lemonade Sufficient Brew-Ha-Ha?”

  1. Joe
    August 10th, 2010 @ 2:14 am

    It is never too early to learn that government is not your friend.

  2. Joe
    August 10th, 2010 @ 2:14 am

    It is never too early to learn that government is not your friend.

  3. Joe
    August 9th, 2010 @ 10:14 pm

    It is never too early to learn that government is not your friend.

  4. JeffS
    August 10th, 2010 @ 4:12 am

    WTF happened to Oregon?

    It was colonized by Californians moving north, generally skipping over northern California. Same thing happened to Washington State. Most of the lefties inhabit the lands west of the Cascades, but some have slipped over the mountains as well.

    I was born in Oregon, and raised in Washington. My uncle is retired in Douglas County, and often refers to it as “liberal country”. So I feels your pain, Smitty.

  5. JeffS
    August 10th, 2010 @ 4:12 am

    WTF happened to Oregon?

    It was colonized by Californians moving north, generally skipping over northern California. Same thing happened to Washington State. Most of the lefties inhabit the lands west of the Cascades, but some have slipped over the mountains as well.

    I was born in Oregon, and raised in Washington. My uncle is retired in Douglas County, and often refers to it as “liberal country”. So I feels your pain, Smitty.

  6. JeffS
    August 10th, 2010 @ 12:12 am

    WTF happened to Oregon?

    It was colonized by Californians moving north, generally skipping over northern California. Same thing happened to Washington State. Most of the lefties inhabit the lands west of the Cascades, but some have slipped over the mountains as well.

    I was born in Oregon, and raised in Washington. My uncle is retired in Douglas County, and often refers to it as “liberal country”. So I feels your pain, Smitty.

  7. Estragon
    August 10th, 2010 @ 4:32 am

    Anyone who believes transporting illegal beer is a “job Americans won’t do” should contact me in care of Smitty.

    Heck, if it’s good enough beer, I’ll even work on shares.

  8. Estragon
    August 10th, 2010 @ 4:32 am

    Anyone who believes transporting illegal beer is a “job Americans won’t do” should contact me in care of Smitty.

    Heck, if it’s good enough beer, I’ll even work on shares.

  9. Estragon
    August 10th, 2010 @ 12:32 am

    Anyone who believes transporting illegal beer is a “job Americans won’t do” should contact me in care of Smitty.

    Heck, if it’s good enough beer, I’ll even work on shares.

  10. nohammernosickl
    August 10th, 2010 @ 6:29 am

    I guess now Oregon has their own Reinheitsgebot.

    It should stay as one of the best states for beer, except that last year Oregon proposed an increase in beer taxes of 1,900%.

  11. nohammernosickl
    August 10th, 2010 @ 6:29 am

    I guess now Oregon has their own Reinheitsgebot.

    It should stay as one of the best states for beer, except that last year Oregon proposed an increase in beer taxes of 1,900%.

  12. nohammernosickl
    August 10th, 2010 @ 2:29 am

    I guess now Oregon has their own Reinheitsgebot.

    It should stay as one of the best states for beer, except that last year Oregon proposed an increase in beer taxes of 1,900%.

  13. Virginia Right! News Hound for 8/10/2010 | Virginia Right!
    August 10th, 2010 @ 8:18 am

    […] Wasn’t The Lemonade Sufficient Brew-Ha-Ha? […]

  14. Alert1201
    August 10th, 2010 @ 12:21 pm

    Not to mention all those pour lemons that were cut in half, gutted for their juice and then discarded in the local land fill.

  15. Alert1201
    August 10th, 2010 @ 12:21 pm

    Not to mention all those pour lemons that were cut in half, gutted for their juice and then discarded in the local land fill.

  16. Alert1201
    August 10th, 2010 @ 8:21 am

    Not to mention all those pour lemons that were cut in half, gutted for their juice and then discarded in the local land fill.

  17. Red
    August 10th, 2010 @ 2:35 pm

    So that nice gulfcoast breeze isn’t a tropical storm after all. It is the great suck that is Oregon.

  18. Red
    August 10th, 2010 @ 2:35 pm

    So that nice gulfcoast breeze isn’t a tropical storm after all. It is the great suck that is Oregon.

  19. Red
    August 10th, 2010 @ 10:35 am

    So that nice gulfcoast breeze isn’t a tropical storm after all. It is the great suck that is Oregon.

  20. Alec Leamas
    August 10th, 2010 @ 8:01 pm

    Isn’t Portland known for its lenient attitude towards street-dwelling methamphetamine and heroin addicts colloquially termed “Street Kids?” I mean, to the point that the government gives free needles and law enforcement isn’t all that interested in the open sale and use of narcotics?

    What am I missing here?

  21. Alec Leamas
    August 10th, 2010 @ 4:01 pm

    Isn’t Portland known for its lenient attitude towards street-dwelling methamphetamine and heroin addicts colloquially termed “Street Kids?” I mean, to the point that the government gives free needles and law enforcement isn’t all that interested in the open sale and use of narcotics?

    What am I missing here?