The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

@CrowleyCNN Targeted by Fat Jokes, Legitimate Criticism, But Mainly …

Posted on | October 17, 2012 | 38 Comments

. . . yeah, it’s the legitimate criticism:

If Tuesday night’s presidential debate proved nothing else, it demonstrated one thing: CNN’s Candy Crowley is definitely not an “uncommitted voter.” The moderator’s handling of the town-hall debate at Hofstra University was heavy-handed and one-sided throughout, not merely giving more time to President Obama, but repeatedly cutting off Mitt Romney when the Republican attempted to counter accusations from the president. . . .

That’s from my American Spectator column, and I’m glad Smitty was kind enough to do a roundup of Benghazi-related debate reaction, because I was up until the pre-dawn hours this morning, and woke up about 10 a.m. too frazzled to think about it.

John Nolte at called Crowley’s performance “a scandal; a total and complete media scandal . . . Absolutely disgraceful.” Matthew Sheffield of Newsbusters said Crowley “disgraced herself . . . showing why many Americans were rightfully suspicious of her ability to moderate a presidential debate fairly.” Donald Douglas at American Power called it “the worst debate moderation in presidential debate history.”

Not one of them felt it necessary to point out that Candy Crowley is fat, and I’m happy for that, because too many people resort to such cheap insults when they’re angry, and it hurts the feelings of fat people everywhere. This kind of cruelty toward BBWs and plumpers also bothers “chubby chasers” like Dan Collins, whose appreciation of Rubenesque ladies is so often misunderstood.

This probably explains why Dan’s colleague Bruce McQuain at Conservative Commune tactfully avoided any reference to Ms. Crowley’s extra pounds when criticizing her moderation of the debate. Dan himself hasn’t, um, weighed in yet, perhaps because he was so traumatized by seeing his favorite journalist universally excoriated by the blogosphere. Paul Ryan also wisely refrained from making fat jokes on “Good Morning America”:

 “Look, growing the economy through energy, through better job training programs, for getting people back to work, getting the deficit – cutting the deficit, capping spending, getting small businesses growing again. This is our specific five-point plan. These are bipartisan ideas that have worked before. We’re going to do them again. And the specific ideas on how we get off the path that we are on right now, to get this economy growing and creating jobs, and that’s what people saw. They saw a leader with a proven track record of bringing people together, getting things done, creating jobs. And that is exactly why I think Mitt Romney, again, won this debate.”

Attaboy, Paul! Stay focused on the important issues that matter to Americans, including those ladies with “more to love,” many of whom are in fact staunchly Republican. And c’mon, guys, admit it: You don’t mind a gal with more cushion for the pushin’.

Wimpy liberal beta males are usually too insecure to admit their admiration for the plus-size ladies, but genuine red-blooded American guys are unintimidated. So none of us patriotic conservative fellows had a problem with Candy’s deluxe figure, but most of us did have a problem with this:

Crowley Interrupts Romney 28 Times, Obama Just 9

Shut your big fat mouth, Candy. And go make us a sammich.


  • Dan Collins

    I wouldn’t hit that with a harpoon.

  • Bob Belvedere

    No comment.

  • AnonymousDrivel

    “Shut your big fat mouth, Candy. And go make us a sammich.”

    Um, better make it two to make sure one makes it to the Lay-Z-Boy.

    I denounce myself. Not all of me; just the pig-headed half.

  • smitty

    Doubling down on the lack of comment, paying meticulous attention to ignoring both equipment source and origin of motive force.

  • Dai Alanye

    You have to give Candy credit, though — she clearly won the debate.

    In Romney’s place, when Crowley started her own line of questioning I would have [at least considered saying,] “Let me stop you, Candy. According to the rules it is the audience who asks the questions.” (Raising voice.) “Does anyone out there have another question for me?”

  • DonaldDouglas

    I am cracking up here. Actually, I think Candy’s pretty hot!

  • htowt

    While we are mocking the efforts of Ms. Crowley, please keep in mind that spontaneous applause broke out as she accosted Mr. Romney. Republicans are still operating at a cultural disadvantage and that’s a lot to overcome in an election.

  • McGehee

    As far as I’m concerned there is only one fat joke, and his name is Michael Moore.

  • Evi L. Bloggerlady

    Benghazi is a political dog turd for Barack Obama. He and Candy Crowley can try to mold it into a unicorn, but it remains a turd.

    No surprises but Chucky Boo Boo thinks Obama had a big night.

  • Evi L. Bloggerlady

    I recommend drinking them, however. I had two last night and they were yummy. The recipe is posted.

  • JamieJeffords

    Do you dream Cass Elliot never met that ham sandwich?

  • James Knauer

    If Romney was “right”, why didn’t he take it to the President right then and there? Why didn’t he attempt to parse the words on the spot if Obama was so “wrong”? Where is the strength of his argument? How many votes in OH will this performance earn Romney?

  • JeffS

    What about a baseball bat?

  • Evi L. Bloggerlady
  • JeffS

    Do you mean the spontaneous applause that started with Michelle Obama ….. and which was expressly against the rules both parties agreed to?

    If so, that’s a terrible job of cherry picking.

    If not…..hmmmmm, I don’t believe that it’s not. You’re JAFT.

  • JeffS

    PS: Please note that I never said word one about Candy Crowley being fat.

  • Evi L. Bloggerlady

    In Candy’s room, there are food wrappers all over the floor,
    but to get to Candy’s room, you gotta walk the darkness of CNN’s halls,
    Staffers from Obama, call my baby’s number and they bring her cheese,
    When I come knocking, she smiles pretty, she knows I wanna be Candy’s squeeze,
    There’s a sadness hidden in that pretty rounded face,
    a sadness all her own,
    with the hope the media can keep Obama safe.
    We eat a pizza,
    my heart burn coming back again,
    when I touch the last piece of pizza, She stabs a fork in my hand,
    I go driving deep into the light, in Candy’s eyes. She says,
    “Just wait for the Presidential Debate suckas!
    Talk about a death wish!”

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  • rosalie

    Why do you think we have these stupid formats with biased moderators? The Rupublicans should raise hell about them in the first place.

  • K-Bob

    IF Obama was right, why did he need help from the moderator? Why didn’t he state the exact phrase he used when Mitt asked him to, point blank? Where is the strength of his argument? Why does Obama hate coal miners and steelworkers in Ohio, who wouldn’t vote for him now, even if they died and were buried in Chicago?

  • K-Bob

    To add some heft to your statement, I, too would like to point out that the girth of the moderator, while substantial, has never been a part of any of the heavy load of verbage I’ve seen or participated in, regarding this debate..

  • AnonymousDrivel

    Al Goracles might be a contender. He’s certainly bloated with CO2.

  • Adjoran

    Um . . . we’re gonna need a bigger boat.

  • Adjoran

    The applause and the questions on Romney v Bush, women’s pay, contraception, and “assault weapons” proves that the audience was infiltrated by Democratic plants masquerading as “undecided” voters and moderated by a Democratic operative masquerading as William “Refrigerator” Perry.

  • Adjoran

    The one thing which hasn’t been addressed yet, that I know of: Crowley pointed to a transcript of Obama’s Rose Garden statement. Now, yes, we know the “terror” mention in that was not about Benghazi, but I have another question.

    Out of all the things she might have at her fingertips, WHY would she have that on her moderating desk? Did she know it would be needed? Did someone slip it to her? How was she able to put her finger on the exact statement so fast?

  • Evi L. Bloggerlady
  • Evi L. Bloggerlady
  • Rich Vail

    Hey guys, big girls need love too…

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  • johnlarosa

    I resisted the temptation to mock Barack’s bovine buddy…didn’t want to get called a “Girther”. I did call her out on Twitter for blatantly lying in defense of the President. That earned me a retweet from Ann Coulter and about 1,000 new trolls.

  • Becca Lower

    I know that it’s traditional here to let the trolls hang themselves, but can’t resist… James, the real question is: how many votes in OH did our president lose with his comments? ‘Cause Ohioans may yet be reeling on Nov.6 from the concept that low gas prices are a bad thing. Thanks for playing, though!

  • Ratspinkie

    I want to know how it was that BHO walked over to Kerry Ladka (the guy with the Benghazi question) and said “Hi, Kerry” BEFORE Kerry Ladka stood up and introduced himself. Is BHO communicating by way of telepathy these days?

  • Ratspinkie

    If you watch the debate again, you’ll notice that the “spontaneous applause” were led by Michelle Obama sitting in the back row wearing a bright pink dress. I don’t think Michelle realized that there was a camera in back of her. Or maybe she did but just didn’t care.

  • SDN

    Not if it involves crossing species they don’t.

  • SDN

    Because the whale they call Candy was in the way.

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