The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

Fear And Smitty In Las Vegas

Posted on | October 1, 2011 | 19 Comments

by Smitty

[Updated to emphasize future tense.]

The Western Republican Leadership Conference will be hosting, with CNN, a debate at the Sands Expo on 18 October. That’s a little over two weeks away.

Now this blog may be Eastern, highly critical of Republicans, and think that leadership is just one of them book learnin’ concepts you talk about in lieu of delivering a jolly flogging to the foe, but there is only one correct response to the mention of an excuse for a Vegas trip:

This debate occurs while I have a bit of time, and the wife hasn’t spent all of the deployment savings on… wherever it goes. Whether we can do anything about Stacy’s roulette problem remains to be seen:
We’re trying to explain to Stacy that he is not the President, and these numbers on the felt do not represent green energy companies, but, once a Democrat, always a Democrat, they say.

Stacy is burning the cel phone tower down calling all of our left coast chums. He might be staying for several days, breaking news at the conference in his inimitable fashion. Most likely my time will be curtailed to two days, as the World’s Youngest Blogger and Mrs. The Other Smitty have me on a short leash.

Update: use of Smitty in the title means that I should show up somewhere in the post:

The Machismo burrito bar is really in Norfolk, VA, but this is a recent mug.

Consider hitting the freaking tip jar: frogskins make the Gonzo flow!


19 Responses to “Fear And Smitty In Las Vegas”

  1. robertstacymccain
    October 1st, 2011 @ 7:31 pm

    A fortune teller told me my Vegas winnings will, one day, be hundreds.

    I do believe in fortune tellers. Once one told me I would be coming
    into money. Next day, I met a girl named Penny and had sex with her. Isn’t that spooky?

  2. smitty
    October 1st, 2011 @ 7:46 pm

    Not as spooky as the tale told by a cross-dresser named Peregrine, but it’s unrelated. I hope.

  3. Anamika
    October 1st, 2011 @ 7:47 pm

    Too bad the girl’s name wasn’t Angel.

    Coming into money is one thing.

    But coming into something divine is a hell of a lot better.

  4. Anonymous
    October 1st, 2011 @ 8:18 pm

    WHOA! Some imposter troll hacked my account and posted something I just deleted.

  5. Quartermaster
    October 1st, 2011 @ 8:20 pm

    As I scrolled down, I expected to see a Pic of Smitty relaxing and sluffing off the stress of clearing the Afghan Sea of our enemies only to find a pic of that McCain fella.

    Tell me, Smitty, how did that McCain fella cheat you out of your well earned R&R in sin city?

  6. smitty
    October 1st, 2011 @ 8:33 pm

    I thought it sounded a bit out of character.

  7. smitty
    October 1st, 2011 @ 8:34 pm

    No cheating; we’re taking advantage of my leave for some mad adventures.

  8. Anonymous
    October 1st, 2011 @ 8:38 pm

    It seems the way the post was written conveys the idea that we’re already IN Vegas, rather than planning a trip for Oct. 18. This may explain the lack of tip-jar action, since the readers might get the idea that their contributions would be paying to bail me out for my roulette losses. In fact, the photo of me at the table (seated across from Ali) was posted during my now-legendary winning night in March 2010.

    Perhaps an update to clarify?

  9. SDN
    October 1st, 2011 @ 9:32 pm

    So which of you is playing Oscar Acosta?

  10. Thomas Knapp
    October 2nd, 2011 @ 12:28 am

    “Whether we can do anything about Stacy’s roulette problem remains to be seen”

    Having written the (e-)book on the subject (not a pun), I’ll happily souvenir each of you a copy. Just get back to me with your email addresses (I think you have mine, or there’s a contact form on my blog). 

    Problem solved.

  11. McGehee
    October 2nd, 2011 @ 12:46 am

    With Stacy as Frank and Smitty as Dino, who are the other nine helping out with the heist?

  12. Anonymous
    October 2nd, 2011 @ 3:10 pm

    Neither of us is a lawyer, although I’ve always thought Smitty seemed vaguely Samoan.

  13. Anonymous
    October 2nd, 2011 @ 3:36 pm

    I’d think Detective Paco would be a natural for Duke Santos.

  14. Bob Belvedere
    October 2nd, 2011 @ 8:27 pm

    Are you Samoen by any chance?

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