Great Advertising Gimmick; Also, Stupid

Posted on | October 30, 2011 | 19 Comments

by Smitty

Proudly announcing a ‘Real Food Revolution – Paleolithic cuisine!’, there is no cheese, bread or sugar available, only fare accessible to our hunter-gatherer ancestors more than two million years ago.

How, short of a time machine, do we really know anything about what went on that long ago, pray tell?

It’s not to say that archeologists are stupid or anything, but we tend to assert that the ancients didn’t know much until we find some evidence that shows people were not morons before Isaac Newton. Flipping the discussion around, if there was evidence that they had produced a Taco Town Taco, would that make the ancients smarter, or dumber?

Looked at yet another way, if the Noble Savage Myth is valid, why aren’t these #OWS losers really going primitive? Put up or shut up, clowns.

via Drudge

Category: Uncategorized

Comments

19 Responses to “Great Advertising Gimmick; Also, Stupid”

JeffS
October 30th, 2011 @ 6:37 pm

I didn’t see any grubs on the menu. Or raw liver, or other internal organs that contain a great deal of vitamins and minerals

Nor do I see any cooking on a genuine wood fire. Not to mention, unhygienic living conditions. Modern kitchens are a blessing, as anyone who has cooked in the woods will tell you.

Something tells me that these loves of “Stone Age cuisine” would run screaming from Charred Elk On A Stick.
ThomasD
October 30th, 2011 @ 6:37 pm

No beer.

That’s pretty much deal breaker.
Anonymous
October 30th, 2011 @ 6:40 pm

Cool. I wonder how much of a steak dinner I can buy with a flint rock, some moss, and a string of non-hallucinogenic hemp? And is this a “casual, come as nude as you are” establishment, or is peltwear required?
Erik McA
October 30th, 2011 @ 6:40 pm

Smitty,

I use this to download youtube videos: http://www.bestvideodownloader.com/ might make your content a bit cleaner… HILARIOUS video, I love those guys.
Dianna Deeley
October 30th, 2011 @ 7:31 pm

I don’t know; if they run screaming, there’s more for those of us who aren’t scared by Charred Elk on a Stick. If they don’t, and we hang back, we can avoid the chance of the prions in Mad Elk getting to us.

Is that a win-win, or what?
Jason Rideout
October 30th, 2011 @ 7:42 pm

Come on, Smitty. You’re smarter than this, aren’t you???

It’s really, really, REALLY easy to figure out which foods can be found in nature, and which are products of agriculture and/or industry. I mean really easy. Seriously, like… n0-brainer, stoopid-easy.
Joe
October 30th, 2011 @ 7:46 pm

Althouse had this article the other day. A hipster fest, but it did have a grain of truth–entrees mostly suck (the exception being steak houses and sushi restaurants). Of course sushi is a meal of appetisers, so that is not a fair point. And I know plenty of fish that tastes awesome cooked (a well made paella or bouillebaise is really outstanding entree). But it is true nothing quite satisfies consistently and reliably as a properly prepared steak.

And what tastes even better: Going hunting or fishing and having what you got that day.
Joe
October 30th, 2011 @ 7:47 pm

Ask Stacy about the KIA deer. I bet that was some of the best meat ever. He was bitter about the van, but at least he was able to eat the problem.
Joe
October 30th, 2011 @ 7:49 pm

You can cook well in the woods. Some of the best fish and fowls I ever had were grilled “butterflied” on some sharppened sticks over a wood fire. You do need salt. And pepper.

And some fine adult beverages help too.

Okay, maybe this cave man thing is over rated.
chuck coffer
October 30th, 2011 @ 7:56 pm

Cave men were cannibals too. Does the menu reflect that?
McGehee
October 30th, 2011 @ 8:07 pm

I’m of the opinion ancient man developed fire so he could make alcohol when he wanted instead of waiting for berries to ferment. He found out meat tasted better cooked purely by accident.
Dave C
October 30th, 2011 @ 8:42 pm

So are they going back to a stone/pottery age type of kitchen to serve food or going to stick with a modern kitchen and stick with an easier menu?

[side of buffalo, coming right up.]
DaveO
October 30th, 2011 @ 8:50 pm

Prior to the big breakup at Babel, cavemen and women created Ur-food:

burritos
tacos
beer
distilled spirits
dumplings
steak
beer
& sports, which would go on to inspire many more foods.
Anonymous
October 30th, 2011 @ 9:16 pm

The fact that your starving by the time the work of getting food to plate is done makes it taste better. A healthy appetite resulting from exertion makes a tasty sauce.
Joe
October 30th, 2011 @ 9:55 pm

Quest for Beverage!
Joe
October 30th, 2011 @ 9:56 pm

It is a sin to char elk.

And to avoid the prions, don’t have elk sweet meats. Frankly I prefer the steaks anyway.
Anonymous
October 30th, 2011 @ 10:05 pm

I don’t know if what they’re serving actually conforms to what our Paleolithic ancestors were scarfing down, but I will say that avoiding the bread, sugar and other grain-based foods has done wonders for my blood sugar and my weight. Abstaining from cheese is right out, though.
Adjoran
October 31st, 2011 @ 1:41 am

Yeah, but if they were really Paleolithic they wouldn’t be cultivating vegetables. They don’t eat grains or legumes, although some forms of both could be “gathered,” but plant and farm other crops.

Sounds like a bunch of hippy crap to me.
Adjoran
October 31st, 2011 @ 1:45 am

“Paleolithic food at yuppy sucker prices!”