Please, Get Your Vagina Off My TV!

Posted on Comments

You know the ads I’m talking about: Lawyers seeking clients for a class-action lawsuit involving . . . um, gynecological problems:

Don’t get me wrong, ladies: I am pro-vagina and pro-health. If you’ve had some kind of problem with a “mesh implant,” I support your right to sue whoever you want to sue. But I don’t ever want to hear about this problem from a TV ad while I’m trying to watch the news.

24 comments

  1. All ads relating to the genital area of both sexes should be off limits.

    It’s ICKY. I don’t want those images in my head while waiting to be entertained.

    Do guys not know to use powder or where to buy jock itch creme? Do gals not know about tampons and pads? (well they seem to forget often enough. If it was me, I’d be timing that cycle with a stop watch.)

    Ads that add no information to our daily routine should be limited to no more than once an hour.

  7. What about laxative commercials? They seem to be more numerous than those cheesy ads for erectile dysfunction and vajayjay issues combined.

    Can we get some relief from getting relief?

  10. All this lawsuit trolling is funded by the legal settlements over tobacco and asbestos, mainly, which made several tort firms so rich they can manufacture other tenuous suits by getting a bunch of Obama voters (mooches) to sign up in the hope of getting paid. Then they can squeeze the companies and/or their insurers to settle.

    Here’s how it works, even if you are insured. The suit is filed, the insurance company figures how much it will cost to defend it, what the potential liability might be if they lose, and calculate what level of settlement makes it all go away. Even if the company WANTS to fight on, if they refuse to settle when the insurer wishes, the insurer is then off the hook and the company is on its own from there.

    It’s more sophisticated extortion than the Jesse Jackson method, but it ends up with millions more in ill-gotten gain for the trial lawyers – to fund more trolling ads and nuisance suits.

  14. Speaking of this advertising genre, I love how they always try to work the message into everyday situations.

    I used to walk in the woods and by the ponds with my late father, when he was still able. Sometimes we would talk about serious matters in the bucolic solitude. But somehow I can never imagine us having this conversation as the sun set over a pond while we waited for the ducks to come in:

    “Dad, something’s been bothering me.”
    “What is it, Son?”
    “Well, Dad, it’s just that . . . lately, sometimes I don’t feel so . . . fresh.”

  16. Back in the seventies, Richard Pryor had a bit where he went on about how nasty ads on TV were getting.

    He said something like: “pretty soon, you’re gonna be sitting at the dinner table, watching TV, and an add for toilet paper is gonna come on, where two guys are sitting on the john, and they both hold their toilet paper up to the screen, and the guy on the left says, ‘Look how much more sh*t my brand of toilet paper wiped off my a$$'”

    We are almost exactly there.

Comments are closed.