The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

$17.76

Posted on | June 20, 2020 | 5 Comments

Whenever it comes time to, uh, celebrate shameless capitalism here, the suggested donation is $17.76, because we love America.

Of course, our patriotic readers know what happened in 1776, and also know that this is why the Fourth of July is celebrated annually.

Because we love America. And we love tradition. So our family has a traditional celebration of our national independence. Which is to say that we shoot off a metric buttload of fireworks. Which cost money.

 

We don’t own slaves, and we don’t topple statues. We don’t engage in arson or looting. We have no “autonomous zone.” We just need more money to complete our massive Fourth of July fireworks display.

 

As a convenience to our readers who are near-sighted (but generous and patriotic) we have brought back the Big Yellow Button. And we remind you that the Five Most Important Words in the English Language are:

HIT THE FREAKING TIP JAR!

UPDATE: According to no less authority than Nikole Hannah-Jones of the New York Times, fireworks are “part of a coordinated attack on Black and Brown communities . . . to disorient and destabilize the #BlackLivesMatter movement.” So please give me money for more.




 

Category: Fireworks, Shoe Leather Fund

Comments

5 Responses to “$17.76”

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    June 21st, 2020 @ 9:11 am

    […] $17.76 […]

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    June 22nd, 2020 @ 11:29 pm

    […] course, if fireworks are “part of a coordinated attack,” you’ll want to help support my family’s Fourth of July fireworks show. Because […]

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    June 25th, 2020 @ 9:25 am

    […] has accumulated a supply that would probably send us to prison in New York. We are grateful to readers who support this patriotic […]

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    […] $17.76 Bacon Time EBL […]

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    July 3rd, 2020 @ 11:22 am

    […] tomorrow is the Fourth of July — $17.76, baby! — now seems like a good time to recall the words of our Declaration of Independence. Because […]