The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

Like Egypt, Charlie Sheen’s Problems Have Finally Reached Crisis Stage

Posted on | January 29, 2011 | 9 Comments

His hookers-and-blow lifestyle has at last become too much even for Charlie.

The Hosni Mubarak of Hollywood bad boys has entered rehab and CBS says Two-and-a-Half Men is “on hiatus.”

Anyone familiar with bipolar disorder would recognize Sheen’s symptoms: He cut a $30,000 check to a porn star Wednesday as a sort of down payment on her joining the “porn family” he was planning:

During the boozefest, Charlie agreed to rent out George’s giant estate for four months — at the rate of $250k per month — while George goes away on an upcoming trip to Thailand.
And why does Sheen need an extra mansion? Charlie explained that he wants to start a “porn family” — and he wants the “actresses” to all live in the same house.

What luck for 22-year-old porn star Kacey Jordan to encounter a millionaire in the midst of a manic episode, huh? TMZ has video of Kacey describing her evening with Charlie Sheen (which I link just so you don’t succumb to the temptation of Googling “Kacey Jordan video”). TMZ calls her a “high-end porn star,” because you wouldn’t want to think the star of a CBS prime-time hit show was partying with low-end porn stars, would you?

How out of control did Charlie get? Lindsay Lohan was worried about him.

Also worried about him: Ex-wife Denise Richards. Can you imagine her trying to explain this to their kids? “No, Daddy won’t be taking you to Chuck E. Cheese this weekend, because he’s too busy snorting up a briefcase full of coke with some porn stars.”

Personally, I think Charlie should have been institutionalized the minute he split with Denise. Letting her get away? Obviously, he was crazy.

So now Charlie’s in rehab and porn star Kacey is lawyered up, which means no more really fun Hollywood news for while.

Oh, wait, no — Demi Lovato just got out of rehab.

Maybe the fun has just begun.


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