The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

BREAKING: Elizabeth Warren 3.1% Saintly Victim, 96.8% Evil Oppressor UPDATED: Her 1/32nd Legacy of Shame UPDATED: Her Confederate Heritage?

Posted on | May 1, 2012 | 42 Comments

Quick, give this lady a casino license:

Desperately scrambling to validate Democrat Elizabeth Warren’s Native American heritage amid questions about whether she used her minority status to further her career, the Harvard Law professor’s campaign last night finally came up with what they claim is a Cherokee connection — her great-great-great-grandmother.
“She would be 1?32nd of Elizabeth Warren’s total ancestry,” noted genealogist Christopher Child said, referring to the candidate’s great-great-great-grandmother, O.C. Sarah Smith, who is listed on an Oklahoma marriage certificate as Cherokee. Smith is an ancestor on Warren’s mother’s side, Child said.

UPDATE: On behalf of the conservative blogosphere, I would like to apologize to Professor Warren Redbone for our previous skepticism — indeed, cruel mockery — of her claim to be a Native American.

Just because she’s blonde and makes a half-million dollars a year, doesn’t mean she’s not a victim of racist oppression. I’m sure when she was growing up, she faced vicious schoolyard taunts — “squaw” and “1/16th half-breed” — which so many children must endure.

UPDATE II: Sources in Boston say Democrat strategists have come up with a new theme song for Professor Redbone’s Senate campaign:

UPDATE III: “The other children always laughed at me …”

UPDATE IV: Donald Douglas points out that the Boston Globe is also reporting on Professor 1/16th Half-Breed’s legacy of shame:

A record unearthed Monday shows that Senate candidate Elizabeth Warren has a great-great-great grandmother listed in an 1894 document as a Cherokee, said a genealogist at the New England Historic and Genealogy Society.

Eighteen ninety-four? Professor Warren’s ancestors were victims of racism 70 years before Jesse Jackson marched in Selma!

Meanwhile, we are unable to verify this e-mail we just received from Warren campaign headquarters, informing us that “the White Man’s Law” prevents them from accepting contributions of wampum beads, although “donations of blankets and firewater are especially appreciated.”

UPDATE V: Professor Glenn Reynolds Redskin has twice as much Native American ancestry as Professor Warren.

UPDATE VI: While we await our casino licenses — we’ve all got a Cherokee ancestor somewhere in our family trees, right? — I’ll point out that the Cherokee Nation allied itself with the Confederate States of America, and fought under Gen. Stand Watie, C.S.A.

This means that Professor Warren is almost certainly eligible for membership in the United Daughters of the Confederacy.

Let’s hope those Yankees in Massachusetts will forgive and forget . . .


42 Responses to “BREAKING: Elizabeth Warren 3.1% Saintly Victim, 96.8% Evil Oppressor UPDATED: Her 1/32nd Legacy of Shame UPDATED: Her Confederate Heritage?”

  1. RefudiateObama2012
    May 1st, 2012 @ 10:29 am

    There are probably tens of millions of us who are at least 1/32 Native American.  My wife is 1/8 Cherokee and I’m 1/16 Cherokee. We don’t list our race as Native American. 

  2. E-Mail From Bert the Samoan Lawyer : The Other McCain
    May 1st, 2012 @ 10:41 am

    […] of Pocahontas or something?Elizabeth Warren’s Indian name: Loses Like Coakley.UPDATE: BREAKING: Elizabeth Warren 3.1% Saintly Victim, 96.8% Evil Oppressor /**/ […]

  3. Laurence
    May 1st, 2012 @ 10:42 am

    George Zimmerman being 1/8th black made him a white Hispanic. Elizabeth Warren being 1/32th Native American made Ward Churchill jealous.

  4. richard mcenroe
    May 1st, 2012 @ 10:47 am

    Is there such a thing as a “sixteenthoroon?”

  5. Pathfinder's wife
    May 1st, 2012 @ 10:52 am

    Yeah, it’s called being an American mutt (which is a compliment in my eyes; mutts are loveable, unassuming, and have hybrid vigor 😉 ).

  6. richard mcenroe
    May 1st, 2012 @ 10:59 am

    Elizabeth Warren’s campaign jingle:

  7. richard mcenroe
    May 1st, 2012 @ 11:00 am

    Where’d all the comments go?

  8. Pathfinder's wife
    May 1st, 2012 @ 11:11 am

    Gotta admit: my German husband could more easily pass for part Cherokee than this chick.

    And as somebody who did spend a lot of her childhood harassed for being “dark” let me be the first to say: I find her apparent inability to get a good tan offensive.

  9. GAHCindy
    May 1st, 2012 @ 11:11 am

    My children are 1/16 Cherokee. I’ll be sure to remind them they’re oppressed at least six times before breakfast every day. Wouldn’t want them to go through life without capitalizing on racial resentment. What would the neighbors think?!

  10. Bob Belvedere
    May 1st, 2012 @ 11:17 am

    Damn!…you beat me to the Redbone reference [at least, you stole my Cher one].

  11. Bob Belvedere
    May 1st, 2012 @ 11:18 am

    We no want blankets unless comely squaws come with them.

  12. Bob Belvedere
    May 1st, 2012 @ 11:20 am


  13. joethefatman
    May 1st, 2012 @ 11:35 am

     you and me both.twhat  my family calls  pure heinz 57 Pathfinder’s wife calls American mutt

  14. Pathfinder's wife
    May 1st, 2012 @ 11:53 am

    No Heinz! I refuse to take up the lexicon of the Teutonic hordes!

    Besides, I like homemade ketchup better anyway.

  15. Pathfinder's wife
    May 1st, 2012 @ 11:59 am

    Hey, speak for yourself Runs With Linguine…I want Chief Red Corn (or one of those rugged, young rugby players…).

  16. Quartermaster
    May 1st, 2012 @ 12:02 pm

    She could be enrolled with the Cherokee Nation of Oklahoma. A blood quantum is not required for membership. You simply have to able to trace your ancestory to the Dawes roll and you are in.

  17. Pathfinder's wife
    May 1st, 2012 @ 12:38 pm

    But it could be a cause of embarrassment if, after claiming all these years, none of her forebears showed up on the thing…

  18. Evi L. Bloggerlady
    May 1st, 2012 @ 1:08 pm

    Who knows, I may have a few bison genes in my back ground.  

    I linked you against Stacy.  Great videos.

  19. Evi L. Bloggerlady
    May 1st, 2012 @ 1:09 pm

    Do your children claim “oppression” when you ask them to do their homework or clean their rooms?  

  20. joethefatman
    May 1st, 2012 @ 1:32 pm

     i don’t even like ketchup

  21. GAHCindy
    May 1st, 2012 @ 2:06 pm

     Oh, absolutely.

  22. Elizabeth Warren: Daughter of the Confederacy « Andrew J. Patrick
    May 1st, 2012 @ 2:10 pm

    […] Stacy McCain points out a startlingly pertinent fact: That the Cherokee were allied with the Confederacy during the Civil War, and Warren may thus be elgible to join the United Daughters of the Confederacy. "We are Good […]

  23. Pathfinder's wife
    May 1st, 2012 @ 2:51 pm

    Don’t like ketchup?!?  At least hot sauce or bbq???

    [by the way, I level my racist poking at the Teutonic hordes with love in my heart and a smile on my face, which should acquit me just as readily as Slick Willy of any charges]

  24. Mahtomedi
    May 1st, 2012 @ 3:41 pm

    There are lot of poor Sioux in my state (Minnesota), who even look like Crazy Horse himself, but can’t get a nickel of the casino money.  Probably because of  some kind of  ‘pull up the ladder’ policy amongst the tribe leaders. 

  25. Alborn
    May 1st, 2012 @ 3:56 pm

    My Native American lineage is Seminole not Cherokee. Many in the Southeast AL and FL have Seminole ancestors and should be able to help the rolls for minority status for employers. I knew there was some reason I was not one of the 1%. Now I know, racism.

  26. Peter Ingemi
    May 1st, 2012 @ 4:32 pm

    As I recall Waite was the last Rebel General officer to surrender.

    But rest assured Former Obama Administration official oops I’m sorry I mean chief “Plays the victim” will not be questioned about that slightly confederate past

  27. Maurice
    May 1st, 2012 @ 4:58 pm


  28. Bob Belvedere
    May 1st, 2012 @ 5:07 pm

    I’m also part German, so watch it, baby.

  29. Bob Belvedere
    May 1st, 2012 @ 5:07 pm

    More importantly: where have all the flowers gone?

  30. Bob Belvedere
    May 1st, 2012 @ 5:09 pm

    At least get my Injun name right: Dances With Pulchritude

  31. joethefatman
    May 1st, 2012 @ 5:45 pm

    Not so much on the bbq sauce, but i make a killer hot sauce. Habenero,cayene and jalepeno peppers are just to get started. After all I’m in east by God TEXAS!

  32. joethefatman
    May 1st, 2012 @ 5:47 pm

     My God, what a visual…. anyone got some brain bleach!

  33. Dai Alanye
    May 1st, 2012 @ 6:05 pm

    I have an ancestor named Osceola. Never realized what a big deal this was. (It was his first name, so maybe that doesn’t count.)

  34. Charles
    May 1st, 2012 @ 7:17 pm

    I suspect this wouldn’t have been a problem for Elizabeth Warren had she gone back to her native Oklahoma to run for Senate. Doesn’t everyone in Oklahoma claim to be part Cherokee?

    Instead she picked Massachusetts, the one state where people might hold this against her. There is some poetic justice in that.

  35. Pathfinder's wife
    May 1st, 2012 @ 8:09 pm

    Bob…my husband is 100%,   and sprechen; straight off the boat.

    I find him incredibly…exotic…rowrrr 😉

  36. Matthew W
    May 1st, 2012 @ 8:10 pm

    I had a g-g-g-g grandfather marry a Cherokee around 1800.

    Yippee for me !!!

  37. JeffS
    May 1st, 2012 @ 8:14 pm

    OK, I just noticed this, and I’m surprised no one else here has either:

    “BREAKING: Elizabeth Warren 3.1% Saintly Victim, 96.8% Evil Oppressor”

    3.1% + 96.8% =  99.9% ? 100%

    So, what’s the missing 0.1%, Stacy?  Confederate scion?

  38. Mike G.
    May 1st, 2012 @ 8:28 pm

     Ich bin sprechen sie ein bisschen  Deutsch. How!

    We are what is called euphemistically, a European gang bang. But as is the case with most Americans who were in this country back in the day, one of our ancestors was probably raped and pillaged by Indians. So, yeah, I’m part Native American.

  39. Bob Belvedere
    May 2nd, 2012 @ 7:46 am

    Actually, even before I knew I had Cherokee blood in me, I called myself Native American – Hell, I was born in America, so I’m a bloody native. 

    It always drove the Bolshes mad [which is a very good thing].

  40. Bob Belvedere
    May 2nd, 2012 @ 7:48 am

    Those Sioux should sue.

  41. Bob Belvedere
    May 2nd, 2012 @ 7:49 am

    So that’s where you got the recipe for bacon-infused firewater, eh?

  42. Elizabeth Warren Cites Father’s High Cheekbones as Proof of Cherokee Heritage | The Lonely Conservative
    May 3rd, 2012 @ 9:04 am

    […] By Lonely Conservative No comments yetI’ve been so busy this week I haven’t had time to join in the fun with regard to Elizabeth Warren’s Cherokee heritage. She said she only listed herself as […]