The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

YOLO .341, ‘F–K THE HATERS,’ and Other Evidence of Encroaching Madness

Posted on | September 6, 2013 | 61 Comments

Oliver Darcy has the mug shot of Samantha Lynne Goudie, who famously had a Breathalyzer-measured blood-alcohol content of .341 when she was arrested at a football game last week:

“Just went to jail #yolo,” Goudie, using the Twitter handle @Vodka_samm, tweeted.
“Blew a .341 in jail,” she added, saying “I’m going to get .341 tattooed on me because its so epic.”
Goudie, later tweeting “F**K THE HATERS,” deleted or deactivated her Twitter account sometime on Tuesday.

Goudie is a “student” at the University of Iowa, and one wonders what sort of academic rigor is possible when consuming such brain-damaging quantities of booze. She’s into tattoos.

Do girls usually get tattoos when they’re sober? I think not. Is there a correlation between drunkeness and sexual promiscuity? I think so.

Just checked the 2012 exit polls: 60% of voters ages 18-24 voted for Obama. What do you want to bet @Vodka_samm is a Democrat?

Michigan teacher Neal Erickson is probably a Democrat, too. And is now in prison, where Democrats belong.

Mary McCarthy, an editor at Russ Smith’s Slice.com, seemed offended by my “fat lesbian crisis” post. Years ago, I wrote a few pieces for Russ’s epic tabloid, NY Press, but he sold that and the legendary era of the late ’90s NY Press is now just a fading memory.

Trust me, it was awesome, unlike Mary McCarthy:

I’ve been a professional writer for nearly 20 years, including work in the Washington Post, Philadelphia Inquirer, Baltimore Sun, Victorian Homes magazine, many regional magazines in Maryland (two as Editor: What’s Up Eastern Shore and Chesapeake Family) and several newspaper humor columns (‘Quite Contrary’ for Frederick Gazette and Centreville Record Observer). . . .
I’ve appeared as a speaker at national conferences including BlogHer (’10, ’12), BloggyCon (’11, ’12), and the regional Bay to Ocean Writers Conference (’10, ’11, ’12, ’13, ’14). This fall, I start as a teacher in blogging and social media at The Writer’s Center in Washington, DC.

So I could slag her, but then my Twitter feed would fill up with angry people who want to tell me how wonderful Mary McCarthy is, and what an awful person I am for saying bad things about her, and threatening to sue me for defamation, harassment, etc.

And she’s too boring to deserve that. YOLO.

Freshman orientation for university students in Nova Scotia apparently includes Introduction to Canadian Poetry:

Y is for your sister
O is for oh so tight
U is for underage
N is for no consent
G is for grab that ass

Even in Canada, some people are upset about that:

Colin Dodds, president of the University, released this statement: ‘A recent Orientation Week event involving student leaders chanting inappropriate and offensive lyrics is completely inexcusable and violates our University’s commitment to upholding the values of equality and respect.
‘My colleagues and I were shocked by this incident and are deeply sorry that our students, and now the community at large, were exposed to disturbing sexually charged material.
‘The University regrets that this was allowed to occur and we apologize unreservedly.
‘I am taking measures to ensure it does not happen in the future.’

As bad as that particular sample of Canadian poetry was, was it really that much worse than the average Neil Young song?

Law-abiding citizens with guns? What an excellent idea!

Oberlin College? Not such an excellent idea.

Is pornography killing the economy? Well, it’s not helping Anthony Weiner.

Hey, remember when liberal celebrities were against war and stuff?

Do you really want to read more about Syria? Life’s too short. YOLO.

 

Comments

  • Cube

    Nothing says “No Marketable Skills” like bragging about a 0.341 BAC. And you know that picture will come back to haunt her when she’s looking for a job, maybe for a very long time. Stuff I posted on a listserv 15 years ago still comes up when I google my name. Fortunately it’s work related.

  • M. Thompson

    Hem, hem.

  • unknown jane

    I’m of the opinion that this particular young woman didn’t really care what everyone saw, and I wouldn’t think she was too afraid of what God thought either.
    She seemed a bit beyond the fear stage of life…if anything she seemed rather disdainful and tired of those who were whispering.
    I suppose one could turn it around and say that her detractors were also putting themselves out there in front of God and everyone — and I’m not sure they came out the better for it.
    As I stated: one has to be quite careful of making appearance only based judgements — the literature of western civilization is replete with references to this.

  • Quartermaster

    My daughter did. She did it as a matter of rebellion so she could run my face in the fact that she wasn’t “under my thumb” anymore. It was actually part of her pattern of behavior that later saw he two kinds in my legal custody after social services took them from her.

  • Quartermaster

    First time I’ve seen the term. Alas, given the state of our society, I have a pretty good idea what it means.

  • Quartermaster

    When I was in the Navy, back in the days of Galleys, the only guys that got tats were snockered. The tat artists thought it was a great thing as it acted as an anesthetic for the pain of getting the tat.

  • Dana

    Admitedly, whilst I could guess, I di have to look up the definition of slampiece. My guess was pretty accurate.

  • Quartermaster

    Sure wasn’t Duck Dynasty.

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