The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

Today’s News of the Weird

Posted on | December 12, 2011 | 15 Comments

From Alabama, with love:

A conservative Christian politician has a secret life as a sperm donor for lesbian couples – even though he has campaigned against gay marriage.
American politician Bill Johnson has spent most of this year in Christchurch [New Zealand] helping run the earthquake recovery, all the while using the online persona “chchbill” to meet women who want help to get pregnant.
Under that persona, he has discussed making donations to at least nine women without the knowledge of his family in the US.
Three of the women are now pregnant, and Johnson has assisted another three with donations in the past month. It is believed he has been in communication with at least another three women to discuss sperm donation.

Wait — it gets weirder:

He moved to Christchurch after the February quake without his wife Kathy, a two-time Mrs America finalist who has three children from a former relationship. . . .
The Herald on Sunday approached Johnson on Thursday at a restaurant in Christchurch where he had just finished dining with one of the women he had successfully impregnated.
He said the urge to become a biological father was “a need that I have”.
“I am married to the most beautiful woman in the world. When I married her I knew we couldn’t have any more children. She had a hysterectomy 10 years ago.
“There is nothing my wife would want to give me more in the world than a child of my own.”


We can safely predict that the soon-to-be-ex-politician will be hearing shortly from the lawyer for his soon-to-be-ex-wife. And then he’ll be free to donate sperm to whomever he chooses.


15 Responses to “Today’s News of the Weird”

  1. JeffS
    December 12th, 2011 @ 5:15 pm

    Apparently the dude needed a hobby, and coin collecting didn’t satisfy his needs.

  2. Adjoran
    December 12th, 2011 @ 5:20 pm

    Some people take “O Come All Ye Faithful” too literally.

  3. SteveG
    December 12th, 2011 @ 5:23 pm

    He was having dinner with one (or both?) of the lesbians?

    So, how were the donations delivered?

  4. Bosun349
    December 12th, 2011 @ 5:34 pm

    The big question is: why would anyone want their child to look like this:

  5. ThePaganTemple
    December 12th, 2011 @ 6:15 pm

    I don’t get it, why would a conservative Christian, especially a pastor, want to produce children to be raised by lesbians?

  6. Anonymous
    December 12th, 2011 @ 6:42 pm

    Turkey baster, of course….

  7. Edward
    December 12th, 2011 @ 6:46 pm

    Just like “Welcome aboard!” or “Is there anything I can get you?”.

    Jeesz you make one little mistake thinking people actually mean what they say and nobody will ever let you forget it…..

  8. Anonymous
    December 12th, 2011 @ 6:57 pm

    I wouldn’t write Bill’s future in politics off. Sure, he may never be governor himself, but he’s done wilder things than this before and then gone on to positions of influence. To name two:

    1) Flying to Pakistan then walking into Afghanistan to offer his services as a medic to the mujahadeen during the Soviet occupation in the 80s; and

    2) Recruiting me into the Libertarian Party while serving as its executive director in Missouri before he went back to Alabama and became a Republican (he was our US Senate candidate in ’94).

  9. JeffS
    December 12th, 2011 @ 7:48 pm

    Maybe Bill will move to New York next, and run for Congress there as a Democrat.

    After Hillary & Bill Clinton, not to mention Eliot Spitzer and Anthony Weiner, he’s got a great resume.

    New York is certainly fertile ground…….

  10. Charles
    December 12th, 2011 @ 7:58 pm

    Sleeper agents.

  11. Anonymous
    December 12th, 2011 @ 7:58 pm

    Ohhh . . . a Libertarian.

    Then this behavior is actually normal.

  12. Chefmojo
    December 12th, 2011 @ 8:02 pm

    Roll Tide!

  13. Anonymous
    December 12th, 2011 @ 8:05 pm

    No, not a Libertarian. Johnson returned to Alabama, left the Libertarian Party and went Republican in, I think, the late 1990s.

    He’s since gone very much “big-government Republican” (but I repeat myself), at one time heading up the Alabama agency that disbursed “faith-based initiative” corporate welfare.

    I’m at a loss to explain his transition from radical libertarian to mainstream Republican. I’d thought any immediately preceding accidents involving traumatic brain injury would have made the paper.

  14. Joe
    December 12th, 2011 @ 8:15 pm

    And Onan knew that the descendant would not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother’s wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give a descendant to his brother.

    Genesis 38:9

    Bill Johnson definitely did not spill it on the ground.  You have to give him credit for that! 

  15. M. Thompson
    December 13th, 2011 @ 3:09 am

    Well, he’s trying for the Genghis Khan/Victoria method of rule:  have the most descendants.