The Other McCain

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Exhausting the Blitzkrieg Metaphors

Posted on | July 9, 2014 | 19 Comments

Everyone who watched Tuesday’s World Cup semifinal match between Germany and Brazil was astonished by the historic 7-1 destruction the Germans inflicted on the host squad:

It is not Brazil, alone, that is in shock after the greatest humiliation in World Cup history.
Those of us who have held the 1970 Brazil team of Pelé, Gérson, Tostão, Carlos Alberto and others as the pinnacle of how soccer can and should be played must now put Brazil’s capitulation on Tuesday as the nadir.
Germany was good — very, very good in trouncing the Seleção 7-1 in one of its own stadiums Tuesday. But we cannot yet know how good because this was not, as some have said, a ruthless German exhibition of modern soccer. It is a Germany team that has been six years in the making, a squad that has coasted through this World Cup so far.
In Belo Horizonte, Germany met no opposition. Brazil, shorn of its poster boy Neymar because of an injury and deprived of its defensive leader Thiago Silva because of a suspension, simply rolled over like a puppy afraid at the sight of a Rottweiler.

By halftime, Germany was ahead 5-0 and the humiliation of Brazil was so intense it sparked fears of rioting and political instability:

The aftermath of Brazil’s defeat could turn ugly. There were reports of a mass robbery at a fan party in Rio de Janeiro and of fans setting fire to Brazilian flags in the streets of São Paulo even before the match was over. Local organizers and government officials have been concerned for weeks about the possibility that demonstrations — which have, for the most part, been subdued — would become more intense if Brazil were to be eliminated.
Many Brazilians have been upset about the billions of dollars spent on new stadiums and other World Cup-related projects. The success of the national team provided a natural balm, but now those emotions may become more inflamed.
“The time of bread and circus is over,” said Lisa Rodrigues da Cunha Saud, who attended the game with her brother. “Instead of stadiums, we need hospitals and schools,” she added.

Anyway, another occasion for Twitter sarcasm.



19 Responses to “Exhausting the Blitzkrieg Metaphors”

  1. Michael
    July 9th, 2014 @ 11:38 am

    I hadn’t one side surrender and give up at the sight of Germans since the French in the 1940s.

    The Germans had a extra large serving of kraut, garlic, and onions. No Brazilian player wanted to come within 5 feet of one of them!

    Rumor has it that the Brazilian coach asked the German coach if he could hitch a ride on the German bus out of the stadium. Not after the game. At halftime.

    As someone who views Brazil like the New York Yankees (whenever they lose, GOOD!), I could keep going all day.

  2. Evi L. Bloggerlady
    July 9th, 2014 @ 11:55 am

    The Germans are saving the Brazilians’ tears and using them to salt their pretzels.

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  4. M. Thompson
    July 9th, 2014 @ 12:33 pm

    So, where’s the German Rule 5?

  5. Evi L. Bloggerlady
    July 9th, 2014 @ 1:12 pm

    I had a German soccer fan in this one.

    But I agree a German World Cup Rule 5 is warranted (and probably Argentina too since they will likely both be in the finals).

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  7. Buffalobob
    July 9th, 2014 @ 2:22 pm

    What surprised me was the fact that they had numbers that went up that high for a soccer/foootball score board.

  8. DaTechGuy on DaRadio
    July 9th, 2014 @ 2:46 pm

    I think that comparison is unfair to the french who put up a better fight in 1941 than Brazil did yesterday

  9. Quartermaster
    July 9th, 2014 @ 3:53 pm

    If Brazil had been beaten by the Argies, the end would never be heard about. There might even have been war.

    The pic of that blond, blue eyed beauty is clearly a subliminal ad for White Supremacism. I denounce you.

    She is cute, however.

  10. Quartermaster
    July 9th, 2014 @ 3:53 pm

    One article I read about the loss, the Krauts were asking “what happened?”

  11. texlovera
    July 9th, 2014 @ 4:16 pm

    The Brazilians never should have used the Maginot formation; fails every time…

  12. JeffS
    July 9th, 2014 @ 4:28 pm
  13. Finrod Felagund
    July 9th, 2014 @ 5:22 pm

    I saw this one-word summary in a web comment– it’s horrible, but also funny:


  14. K-Bob
    July 9th, 2014 @ 6:21 pm

    Wait, what????

    Oh. Soccer.

  15. Quartermaster
    July 9th, 2014 @ 7:41 pm

    This Kraut couldn’t care less either.

  16. M. Thompson
    July 9th, 2014 @ 9:57 pm

    She’s a very nice Football Fraulein.

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