The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

Thanksgiving in Georgia

Posted on | November 26, 2021 | Comments Off on Thanksgiving in Georgia

We spent Thursday on the road, down I-81 and then went through the Smoky Mountains on I-26 before heading south into north Georgia, near the site of America’s first gold rush, to spend the holiday weekend with all of our kids and grandchildren — that’s six kids, one son-in-law, three daughters-in-law, one girlfriend, and five grandchildren. That’s a total of 18 people, plus both of my brothers, a good-sized crowd of McCains.

While I was out on the road, the news kept happening:

Violent death, sexual perversion, pandemic disease — the apocalypse keeps rolling along. And I’m in Georgia, enjoying a Thanksgiving feast.

We should be more grateful than we are for the blessings of a normal life, even if we are paying $1.20 more for a gallon of gas (#LetsGoBrandon).

It’s easier to complain about our misfortunes and disappointments — the Raiders beat the Cowboys and the Bills beat the Saints — than to be grateful that our lives are basically OK, in an age where it seems it’s becoming more difficult to be basically OK. My daughters just popped into the motel dining room where I’m working, then quickly departed to go do their Black Friday shopping. And I’m grateful they’re basically OK.

Our youngest daughter (Reagan) and youngest son (Emerson) are in college, while the next-youngest (Jefferson) is getting ready for law school next year (awaiting his LSAT scores). Emerson’s already married, as are our three oldest, all of whom are homeowners with kids of their own. All in all, our Victory Through Breeding™ agenda — the McCain Plan for Global Domination — seems to be working out.

Why aim for anything less that Global Domination? Sure, it could take a few generations before my descendants control the world — trust me, I’ve done the arithmetic — but as long as we keep this long-term goal in mind, our tasks in the short term become easier to understand.

The reason I bring this up, of course, is that the source of disappointment is the distance between expectation and reality. Even if our circumstances are objectively good — hey, we’re living the American Dream — we may feel disappointed because results fall short of our expectations, our hopes, our ambitions. The higher our expectations, the more likely we will be disappointed by the reality of our lives. It’s important to keep this in mind, attempting to view our lives objectively, no matter how high our ambitions may be. Considering that my ultimate goal is Global Domination — because why not? — it would be easy to get discouraged by short-term disappointments. For example, we haven’t had a new grandchild since Luca was born two years ago, which represents a lag in the Grandchild Production Quota. When you’re aiming at Global Domination, you tend to think of grandchildren with a statistical graph in mind, charting the output-per-unit calculations and so forth.

Objectively, you see, most people would think five grandkids to be a fine number, but the McCain Plan for Global Domination requires a perspective that evaluates this metric differently than “most people” (who, after all, are destined to be subjugated, according to the Plan).

All sarcasm aside, however, the point is that we have so much to be grateful for this Thanksgiving that any complaints would seem silly. Here I am, enjoying free coffee and free breakfast at the motel — with free Wifi even! — and certainly it would be churlish for me to complain.

“The truth is this: The march of Providence is so slow and our desires so impatient; the work of progress so immense and our means of aiding it so feeble; the life of humanity is so long, that of the individual so brief, that we often see only the ebb of the advancing wave and are thus discouraged. It is history that teaches us to hope.”
Robert E. Lee

When one considers the hardships and misfortunes that our ancestors endured, how easy and fortunate our lives seem by comparison. We ought never to let discouragement prevent us from working toward a better future — and, of course, by “better,” I mean Global Domination.

Did I mention that everything is “free” at this motel because three nights cost us $500? As always, I would be grateful for readers who remember that the Five Most Important Words in the English Language are:


Thanks in advance. This Global Domination stuff ain’t cheap.

UPDATE: Welcome, Instapundit readers!



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