The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

‘Adrenochrome-Rich Young Girls’

Posted on | October 27, 2022 | Comments Off on ‘Adrenochrome-Rich Young Girls’

“There’s only one source for this stuff,” Raoul Duke tells Doctor Gonzo in Hunter S. Thompson’s Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, when his Samoan attorney offers him adrenochrome. “The adrenaline glands from a living human body. . . . It’s no good if you get it out of a corpse.”

Thompson insisted that Fear and Loathing was a novel, a work of fiction, although it is loosely based on two separate trips to Vegas he made with the notorious radical lawyer Oscar Zeta Acosta. There’s a long story behind the inspiration, but the point is that what Thompson wrote about the origins of adrenochrome — that it involved murdering people to harvest their adrenaline glands — was false, a literary device he created for the sake of the novel, in the same way he invented the teenage runaway “Lucy,” whom Doctor Gonzo savagely molested.

OK, I don’t know that “Lucy” was entirely fictional. Oscar Acosta was a dangerous character, and in the doped-out hippie era in which Fear and Loathing was conceived, there were plenty of stray adolescents who’d do just about anything for their next high. So we can’t rule out the possibility that Oscar Acosta did sexually exploit an aspiring teenage artist at some point during his and Thompson’s Vegas escapade. However, people weren’t being murdered in 1970 for the sake of extracting adrenochrome from their organs, but this wild detail from Fear and Loathing somehow became newsworthy a few years ago because of QAnon.

It was alleged (if anyone actually takes wild tales from the fringes of the Internet seriously enough to call them “allegations”) that the depraved Hollywood elite were murdering children in Satanic rituals to use them as sources of adrenochrome. This claim was utterly crazy, of course. However depraved the Hollywood elite may be –and there’s no sinister misdeed of which I would doubt them capable — and even if they’ve turned to adrenochrome in search of psychedelic thrills, there’s no need to murder children to get it. After this crazy QAnon conspiracy theory surfaced, some reporter at the Daily Beast felt compelled to investigate and found that, while the FDA has not approved adrenochrome for medical use, it’s available to researchers for as little as $55 per dose.

What does this have to do with Joe Biden sniffing little girls?

Nothing, actually, but Ace of Spades started having fun with the adrenochrome conspiracy theory while mocking Associated Press reporter Zeke Miller’s fawning feature article about what a swell guy Biden is in one-on-one personal contact situations:

[Miller’s AP article] Still, Biden insists that time be built into his schedule so he can interact with people at his events — such encounters seem to energize him…

[Ace] I know, Zeke. It’s called “adrenochrome.” It’s what he’s sniffing for.
It excites all his tumescent glands.

… There can occasionally be awkward moments, too, such as when a presidential quip lands poorly, that in today’s partisan environment are often broadcast online by his political rivals.

Just his rivals. Only his rivals notice that he frequently speaks in cthonic tongues unknown to surface-dwelling man or begins to wander around in strange patterns as if he’s trying to communicate with invisible bees about where the closest adrenochrome-filled flower can be found.

But [Biden’s “awkward moments”] are outnumbered by the positive interactions that have defined Biden’s career and tested the stamina of his aides.
“He outlasts us,” White House deputy chief of staff Jen O’Malley Dillon told The Associated Press of Biden’s penchant for spending 30 minutes, an hour, sometimes longer shaking hands.

Wow, he spends a full half hour shaking hands, sniffing hair, rubbing his pelvis into the hindquarters of adrenochrome-rich young girls.

Classic AOSHQ humor there and he explains:

I’m making the joke not because I believe in any of that, but because 1, I think it’s kind of funny to just joke about “adrenochrome-rich children,” because 2, pearl-clutching faggots like Jake Tapper will freak out if you make Forbidden Jokes and I like upsetting pearl-clutching faggots like Jake Tapper.
Not to ruin the joke by explaining the joke, but a big part of humor is trying to find out what you’re Not Allowed to Joke About and then joking about it.

Which is what Hunter S. Thompson was doing, really. The idea of Lucy, a teenage religious freak from Montana who specializes in Barbra Streisand portraits, getting brutally banged by a gigantic Samoan high on adrenochrome — this was a Forbidden Joke in literature in 1971, although perhaps less so than today, because statutory rape was more-or-less commonplace during the Swinging Sixties Peace-and-Love Scene, which ended shortly after Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas went to press, as radical feminists didn’t think statutory rape was very funny.

Was it really fiction, though? We’ll never know, because Oscar Acosta went missing shortly after Thompson’s novel was published, and Thompson never commented on the “Lucy” scenario before his death in 2005, but if “Lucy” was based on an actual person, she’d be about 70 years old now. Maybe the drugs permanently scrambled her memory of the savagery she endured in Las Vegas, and she probably has no idea that the fat Chicano who molested her in the Flamingo Hotel was anybody important. If she’s still alive, “Lucy” is probably a kindly old grandma, living in a cabin in Montana, and voting Republican.

Because the truth is always stranger than fiction . . .



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