‘I’m Saying He’s Whacked Out’
Posted on | June 15, 2024 | Comments Off on ‘I’m Saying He’s Whacked Out’
The term “Florida man” has become a sort of punchline, but you probably won’t be laughing when you learn the details about this one. Before proceeding to the gruesome crimes for which Wade Wilson was recently convicted by a jury in Lee County, Florida, let me ask, what’s the first thing you notice about Wade Wilson? Before you answer that question, let’s zoom in that picture just a wee bit:
Yes, he’s got a swastika tattooed on his face, which of course had to make it into the headline in the New York Post:
Man with swastika face tattoos
found guilty of brutal strangling
of two Florida women just hours apart
A crazed Florida man with swastikas and a skeleton smile tattooed on his face has been convicted of murdering two women just hours apart — including a mom he repeatedly ran over and bragged about leaving “like spaghetti” on the road.
Wade Wilson, 30, remained motionless Wednesday as he was convicted of two counts of first-degree premeditated murder in the killings of Kristine Melton, 35, and Diane Ruiz, 43, in October 2019.
It took the Cape Coral jury just two hours to reach the verdict, which leaves him eligible for the death penalty. . . .
(To clarify, it wasn’t a “Cape Coral jury.” The trial was held in the Lee County courthouse in Fort Myers. Cape Coral is another Lee County community where Wilson committed the heinous murders.)
Wilson took Melton home from a bar on Oct. 7, 2019, then strangled her and left her tied up in her home.
(Ladies, don’t leave a bar with a guy who’s got face tattoos.)
Ruiz was reported missing the same day — and Wilson told his dad that she got into his car when he asked for directions.
(Ladies, don’t get in a car with a guy who’s got face tattoos.)
He then admitted strangling her, too, before throwing her out of the car — just to get back in and run her over “until she looked like spaghetti,” jurors were told.
“I choked her out until she couldn’t breathe anymore,” Wilson had told cops of one of the murders. “I came across my mind to murder, just kill, kill, kill.”
Look, I’m not saying that every guy with face tattoos is a homicidal maniac, but the overlap on the Venn diagram between Set A (guys with face tattoos) and Set B (guys who want to “just kill, kill, kill”) is perhaps large enough to be statistically significant. By the way, that quote in the headline? It’s from Wade Wilson’s defense lawyer:
Even one of Wilson’s own attorneys did not hold back on the tattooed maniac, who had bragged during police interviews that he “would do it again.”
“None of this was not depraved,” [attorney Lee] Hollander told Fox 4, saying the defense had only argued that the crimes were not premeditated.
“I’m not arguing insanity, I’m just arguing that state’s claimed premeditation. And I’m saying he’s whacked out, he’s just out of his mind for any of this.”
Honestly, the most surprising part of this story was that it took the jury two whole hours to vote to convict this guy. C’mon, man — he’s got a swastika tattooed on his face! Practically begging for a guilty verdict.
You think you’ve already heard the craziest part of this story, but wait — there’s more! While in jail awaiting trial, Wilson told local Fox affiliate WFTX-TV he had been framed for the crimes:
“I did not commit those murders and I am innocent,” he said.
Over the last year he has continued to reach out and has stuck to that claim, though he’s since shared new details.
Earlier this year [in 2020] he told FOX 4 that he used to be connected to a high-level human trafficking ring and that he would groom women for them.
He says when he tried to leave the ring last year, the group framed him for these murders as punishment.
This is known as “The QAnon Defense,” which is even less effective than the “My Client Is Whacked Out” defense. My brother has thoughts:
An excellent opportunity for me to remind you that I support capital punishment.https://t.co/g0S72rlN1S
— Sam Elliott's Mustache ?????? (@KirbyMcCain) June 14, 2024
In case anyone’s forgotten: Crazy People Are Dangerous.
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