Posted on | April 27, 2012 | 64 Comments
Granted, this could be a very long post, but I just happened to notice Dan blathering on about some artsy New Wave poseurs and felt a need to point out the Neutral Objective Fact that no genuinely great rock and roll music was recorded after Sept. 25, 1980, the day John Bonham died.
How awesome was Led Zeppelin? For the most part, the lyrics were incomprehensible gibberish. More often than not, Robert Plant sang flat.
And nobody f–kin’ cared, because it was so f–kin’ awesome.
Also, we were all stoned out of our minds, because it was the ’70s.
What callow punks like Dan Collins probably don’t understand is that Zep played some great dance music. Believe it or not, kids, back in the day, long-haired freaks used to dance to rock and roll. And it was beautiful, too, because you had these hippie-type chicks in floral midriff tops and hiphugger bellbottom jeans groovin’ to the crazy syncopated rhythms that Bonzo laid down.
Picture in your mind the multicolored blacklight day-glo posters on the wall, and a sweaty smoke-filled roomful of hippie-type girls — with long, long hair — shakin’ it to “Misty Mountain Hop”:
No, wait — better yet — “The Ocean”:
If you lack the imagination to realize how f–kin’ awesome that was, there’s no point in my trying to explain it to you. Kathy Shaidle recently asserted that The Who were better than Zep. But she’s Canadian, which is kind of a synonym for “retarded” anyway.
Back in the day, you could call people “retarded” without being accused of insensitivity. You never saw headlines like this:
Bite me, you faggot bitches.
See? You could say stuff like that back in the 1970s and nobody really cared, because everything was cool back then.
Until John Bonham died, and it’s all been going to hell ever since.