Her Husband ‘Seemed Sensitive, Kind, Intelligent, Liberal, and Feminist . . .’

Posted on | March 28, 2016 | 67 Comments

Oh, that was a very bad omen, really. It is difficult for me to imagine what a “feminist” husband would be, considering that for more than four decades, feminists have argued against marriage, per se.

Exactly why would a feminist want a husband? This is the great riddle.

Fish don’t need bicycles and feminists don’t need men. Such was the doctrine proclaimed by Gloria Steinem, anyway, but nevertheless some women ignore these contradictions and thus, sadly, we have the phenomenon of The Feminist Man. These seem so rare they may be entirely mythical — unicorns, minotaurs, mermaids, Feminist Men.

In theory, a relationship based on a radical egalitarian ideology seems possible. However, feminism’s doctrinaire belief that men and women are fundamentally the same (androgynous) and that there are no natural distinctions between them, inevitably raises the question, “Why”?

That is to say, if men do not possess any specifically masculine traits or characteristics that she admires, why does she associate with him? What purpose does The Feminist Man fulfill? What is his value to her?

According to feminist theory, masculinity is an artificial product of patriarchy, socially constructed by the gender binary within the heterosexual matrix. The male has no essential raison d’être in the feminist scheme of things. He is entirely useless and irrelevant and it is impossible to imagine how a woman who finds males attractive — desirable and perhaps even necessary — could call herself a “feminist.”

Nevertheless, despite these ideological contradictions, The Feminist Man is alleged to exist, and here is the tale of a woman who married one:

I lived happily — blissfully unaware how happily — for 14 years with a man who seemed sensitive, kind, intelligent, liberal, and feminist. We were deeply in love and the kind of couple people looked up to. My marriage was permanent; it defined my future. Two years ago, I would have told you we were unshakable. I couldn’t imagine a scenario that could break us up. My husband was also, to all outward appearances, happy. He enjoyed life and was uniquely easygoing and content. Those qualities made him a joy to chat with, to vacation with, and to live with.
Then my husband woke up one day feeling a little “gender-fluid.” Within three months he developed the conviction that he was a woman and he “came out” to everyone he knew. . . .
He cried because someone “misgendered” him. He cried because his shoulders were too broad for his new dress. He cried because he couldn’t completely eradicate the stubble on his face. He cried because his new habit of flipping his hair back with a limp wrist had gotten him mistaken for a gay man. . . .
He got counseling and joined support groups, where he “learned” that he was “literally” a woman, and not just someone who identified as one. He announced to all comers that he’d found his “true self” and had become “happy” for the first time in his life. His alleged happiness didn’t stop him from spiraling into an even deeper despair. He became suicidal. He was prescribed antidepressants. He adopted bizarre beliefs and became hysterical if anyone questioned them.
All interests were abandoned for endless monologues about transgender rights and his “gender identity.”

Yeah, she married The Feminist Man, and when he turned out to be not actually a man at all — well, she was deeply hurt by this. She searched online forums of other women who had gone through a similar trauma:

This is just the transgender experience. Narcissism, sexual dysfunction, partner neglect, childishness, temper tantrums, lack of impulse control. Tell me again why this is a normal human variation?
It didn’t matter that I thought my marriage was stronger than most, that I thought that my husband was smarter and kinder than most. This was my inevitable trajectory.

Inevitable? Well, if you find The Feminist Man attractive — so “sensitive”! so “kind”! so “liberal”! — what do you really expect? Somewhere behind that “easygoing” façade, your husband was slowly losing his mind as he gazed into the abyss of existential despair. To repeat: The male has no essential raison d’être in the feminist scheme of things.

Feminism is a philosophy that declares men to be utterly useless. It is astonishing how so many women are eager to advocate “equality” — i.e., the eradication of all social distinctions between male and female — and yet do not follow this argument to its logical conclusion.

“Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools . . .”
— Romans 1:22 (KJV)

Once a society embraces certain ideas — syncretistic paganism, for example — the descent into madness is really just a matter of time.

It's amazing how many "educated" people apparently never studied logic or rhetoric, and thus cannot recognize dishonest sophistry.

— FreeStacy (@Not_RSMcCain) March 28, 2016

Category: Sex Trouble

Comments

67 Responses to “Her Husband ‘Seemed Sensitive, Kind, Intelligent, Liberal, and Feminist . . .’”

concern00
March 28th, 2016 @ 11:46 pm

Year after year progressives undermine and destroy yet another foundation, another edifice of Western civilization…white anting everything that is good and wholesome and strong. All of the investment of time and money that was originally made into real progression is slowly diverted into worthless projects that don’t build and contribute anything.

They never build anything of worth to replace what they tear down and destroy. All they leave behind is a void and the abyss.
RKae
March 29th, 2016 @ 12:28 am

Fish don’t need bicycles and feminists don’t need men.

But someone’s gotta kill the spiders and open the jars.
GruntOfMonteCristo
March 29th, 2016 @ 12:41 am

They don’t need men, but they do need servants. And, those servants cannot be drawn from among equals. Hence…
Fail Burton
March 29th, 2016 @ 5:30 am

I Married a Monster from Outer Space was a good movie. Should’ve won an Oscar. I cried like a baby. Of course I was a baby, but I’m just sayin’…
RS
March 29th, 2016 @ 6:21 am

This is just the transgender experience. Narcissism, sexual dysfunction, partner neglect, childishness, temper tantrums, lack of impulse control. Tell me again why this is a normal human variation?

And so, we see a glimmer of recognition. Years of philosophical indoctrination designed to eliminate the ability to discriminate between positive and negative; normal and abnormal; good and evil, lead inevitably to despair and heartache. Is there any doubt that before she experienced this trauma personally, she would have gladly affirmed others within her salons expounding about “gender fluidity” and transsexual “rights,” while alternating between laughing at and condemning the rubes who insist upon maintaining a traditional view of reality? You cannot have it both ways. You cannot participate in the destruction of society while still enjoying its benefits.
CrustyB
March 29th, 2016 @ 7:33 am

This blog will soon become a speakeasy. Sane people like us will come here, knock on a green door, utter a password, and come in to enjoy sanity and normalcy with other sane people. Just outside the door the Feminist Homosexual PC Untouchables will be watching us through pink Dora The Explorer binoculars, ready to raid us. When they bust the joint we’ll have trouble distinguishing between the make-up wearing men and the women with their short haircuts, plaid shirts and heavy-rimmed glasses.
Evi L. Bloggerlady
March 29th, 2016 @ 7:42 am

Meet Reek:
Jeanette Victoria
March 29th, 2016 @ 7:44 am

LOL I read the header and knew where this was going……
physicsnut
March 29th, 2016 @ 7:49 am

// hits the nail on the head
// George Carlin – PC is fascism dressed up as manners = GOT THAT RIGHT
Fail Burton
March 29th, 2016 @ 8:18 am

The daffy Betty Friedan who used the feminist movement as her own therapist’s couch thought gay feminism was so damaging she suggested more than once it was a CIA plant to destroy the movement. Friedan herself did as much as anyone to create an atmosphere where her Frankenstein’s monster she inadvertently created could flourish. Like the monster, gay feminism would’ve killed Friedan if it had any balls, which it doesn’t.
JeffWeimer
March 29th, 2016 @ 8:41 am

Women are equal to men. Men are worthless.

What does that make women, then?
Jeanette Victoria
March 29th, 2016 @ 8:55 am

Scratch a sensitive, kind, loving, feminist husband and look what one finds
Liza
March 29th, 2016 @ 10:19 am

Women need to tell their daughters in no uncertain terms that cross dresser are not okay as marriage material. None of this crap about sometimes adults “play” and “just a little” no. These fetish driven men destroy lives–toxic narcissism. None of these women have mentioned the role porn played. I am betting not a small one.
Liza
March 29th, 2016 @ 10:22 am

Transgender is made up. This seems to be the best explanation for a large number of these guys: “Autogynephilia is defined as a male’s propensity to be sexually aroused by the thought of himself as a female. It is the paraphilia that is theorized to underlie transvestism and some forms of male-to-female (MtF) transsexualism. Autogynephilia encompasses sexual arousal with cross-dressing and cross-gender expression that does not involve women’s clothing per se. The concept of autogynephilia defines a typology of MtF transsexualism and offers a theory of motivation for one type of MtF transsexualism. Autogynephilia resembles a sexual orientation in that it involves elements of idealization and attachment as well as erotic desire. Nearly 3% of men in Western countries may experience autogynephilia; its most severe manifestation, MtF transsexualism, is rare but increasing in prevalence. Some theorists and clinicians reject the transsexual typology and theory of motivation derived from autogynephilia; their objections suggest a need for additional research. The concept of autogynephilia can assist clinicians in understanding some otherwise puzzling manifestations of nonhomosexual MtF transsexualism. Autogynephilia exemplifies an unusual paraphilic category called ‘erotic target identity inversions’, in which men desire to impersonate or turn their bodies into facsimiles of the persons or things to which they are sexually attracted.”

Copyright © 2011 S. Karger AG, Basel.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/22005209
ChandlersGhost
March 29th, 2016 @ 10:42 am

Hahahahahahaha…hahahahaha.
Daniel Freeman
March 29th, 2016 @ 10:59 am

Then my husband woke up one day feeling a little “gender-fluid.”

She misspelled “mentally ill.”
Quartermaster
March 29th, 2016 @ 11:07 am

There you go again! Keep noticing these H8tey H8 facts and you’ll be off to the re-education center.
DeadMessenger
March 29th, 2016 @ 12:51 pm

What could you possibly know? You’re a white patriarch, so I dismiss your point as irrelevent. And intolerant. And rapey.
DeadMessenger
March 29th, 2016 @ 12:54 pm

That’s disgusting. Can’t you find a picture of a shirtless patriarch chopping wood, while his kids play in the background??
DeadMessenger
March 29th, 2016 @ 12:58 pm

BWAHAHAHA!
Daniel Freeman
March 29th, 2016 @ 1:18 pm

Sure, but considering the late onset and list of symptoms, maybe this guy just developed low(er) T. Effeminacy, emotional lability, self-obsession, sexual dysfunction… Instead of a support group, he should’ve tried a testosterone boost.
Jeanette Victoria
March 29th, 2016 @ 1:25 pm

That would NOT be a feminist husband
Liza
March 29th, 2016 @ 1:27 pm

He is a fetish driven cross dresser and liar. He was mostly likely doing it for years and wanted to pleasure himself in Lady Face not have sex with his wife.
Liza
March 29th, 2016 @ 1:32 pm

He was mostly likely crossing dressing and using porn for years behind her back or at times with her knowledge. These men are huge liars.
RS
March 29th, 2016 @ 1:44 pm

The horrific thing is that those who realize their fetish is a problem are precluded from seeking or obtaining the help they need to live normal lives. The reason? The current LGBTQXYZ mafia has made it a crime to address these issues as mental health problems. The perpetrators do not wish to be seen as mentally ill, so they require others to play along with their warped reality. It’s the Emperor’s New Clothes writ in sexual perversion.
Daniel O'Brien
March 29th, 2016 @ 1:55 pm

3% BS
Daniel Freeman
March 29th, 2016 @ 1:59 pm

I think she means for brain bleach. I don’t have any pictures like that, but I could use a mental cleanser too…
Jeanette Victoria
March 29th, 2016 @ 2:05 pm

I don’t need to tell you what the LGBT crowd often sends me………
Jeanette Victoria
March 29th, 2016 @ 2:06 pm

And true
Liza
March 29th, 2016 @ 2:33 pm

This started with the APA and perhaps when this becomes a liability and damages issue they will change their tune. LGBT is also a pathological group but they do not want to spend all their money supporting middle aged, middle class heterosexual fetishists–and T knows that. Hence timely Stonewall drama. It may not crash until some of the kids they have used grow up and speak out. These men are scary and violent and need to be called out publicly as liars–the second anyone backs down to “bigot and hater” game over. The deserve to be mocked and shamed and rightly called men every second they are in public until they leave women and kids alone.
JeffWeimer
March 29th, 2016 @ 3:14 pm

I denounce myself.
Robert What?
March 29th, 2016 @ 4:01 pm

This is my pure speculation, but they probably didn’t have sex for years and he went crazy. Feminist women may find feminist men “a joy to chat with” but they don’t have sex with them.
Kevin Fleming
March 29th, 2016 @ 4:39 pm

I posted on her blog:
“He is a narcissist, but narcissism is the current baseline personality in the US.
Feminists are similar narcissists.
So are the entitled babies wailing about safe spaces in colleges when they are exposed to contrary ideas.

The anger here is against a man who wants to be a female narcissist.
Physically, he cannot.

But in the modern academia-created idea that ‘gender binary’ is entirely a social construct, he can be.
Because his feelings trump his biology.

And worst of all, you can’t complain about it and remain tolerant, or, really, remain a feminist.
Gender norms had a purpose, one of which was providing social utility for married males.

But that’s all been upended by cultural Marxism, e.g., feminism.
So what makes a “woman” as you have thus far defined it is no longer in fact true.
“Woman” is whatever someone says it is.

So I pray for you in this hard time, because I read your terrible pain and betrayal and my heart hurts for you.

Repeatedly, I notice that the words you write here evince a discomfort with his violating gender norms and roles (father, husband, family, work).
I admonish you to recognize your own role in destroying those selfsame norms.

In a gender fluid society, i.e., one aimed solely at affirming the self, why shouldn’t he be an utterly worthless preening narcissist?
Kevin Fleming
March 29th, 2016 @ 4:40 pm

She replied:
“I think you have a reading comprehension problem. I don’t give a shit about gender roles. A woman is a person with a vagina.”

I replied:
“I greatly appreciate your response.

But I disagree that you don’t care about gender roles.

Because that’s nearly the entire discussion you wrote about in “What Do I Expect from Him?”

And it’s chock-a-block with textbook Feminism 101-speak.

“how the gender binary harms women. I expect him to notice that the roles and behaviors assigned to women are not equal to (or even merely different from) the roles and behaviors assigned to men, but are specifically designed to extract women’s service for the benefit of men”
“ugly, male-supremacist system, …the sexualized, vain, subservient role created for women”
“to agree that we are those things patriarchy has said we ar …that it is our job to serve and worship men, that it is our lot to accept the subservient life men have chosen for us”
“I expect him to hold his fellow males accountable for the untruth of these gender roles”
“…prioritize the lived experience of the oppressed sex class”
“internalized patriarchy”

I actually agree with your conclusions that he is wrong and he is a malignant narcissist, and that it is is dangerous to let these people share locker rooms and toilets with women and girls.

However, this is the expected end-result of cultural Marxism.
How do you think this came about anyway?
100-plus years of destroying religion, the family and gender roles has had its desired effects on those bulwarks of civilization.
But you don’t like this ugly aspect of that destruction.

“A woman is a person with a vagina.”
Sorry, not anymore.
I work in a hospital, and now they ask “Gender assigned at birth?” rather than ‘Gender?.’

You are far too late to object, and ethically wrong by the very framework of the cultural relativism.
I would get fired for agreeing with you.”
Kevin Fleming
March 29th, 2016 @ 5:20 pm

Looks like I’ve been booted.
She wrote:
“The “rules” for what a woman “should be” come from you, religionists and transgenderists, two sides of the same coin. They do not come from feminism. You’re done here, as you haven’t done the requisite reading.“
JosephBleau
March 29th, 2016 @ 5:36 pm

I share my “gender fluid” with my wife on a regular basis, and she doesn’t seem to have a problem with it.
DeadMessenger
March 29th, 2016 @ 5:44 pm

This is very true. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/1df6a342c9be9946607b235bfe81df55f02d9001de2015131175b2334fc77332.jpg
DeadMessenger
March 29th, 2016 @ 5:46 pm

Your problem is evidently the unwanted thinking that you’re doing.
Bert
March 29th, 2016 @ 6:39 pm

You had me up to the last sentence. Exhibit “A” for the opposition: Al Gore. Remember, no one makes rules for himself. Rules are always made for other people.
RS
March 29th, 2016 @ 8:10 pm

Certainly there will always be an “Inner Party,” which insulates itself from the horrors inflicted upon others. Another example is those who clamor for unrestricted immigration but live in gated communities with private security to protect them from roving mobs of unassimilated foreign hooligans or rapist Muslim thugs.

That said, however, the vast majority of those who go along with the ride, in order to signal their virtue and sit at the “cool kids” table at lunch inevitably suffer the fate predicted by the rest of us. There is only one Al Gore with his 40,000 square foot, well-heated house. There a hundreds of thousands of people pining away for polar bears who will pay 5 times what they should for electricity because they think they’re doing the right thing. I believe the phrase is “useful idiot.”
feeriker
March 29th, 2016 @ 8:34 pm

Hard to imagine any “man” worthy of the name WANTING sex with a creature like that. Of course if he had even a shred of residual masculinity left in him, he could have found some other woman with whom to cheat on her, something which is an almost effortless accomplishment for even the most Delta of men with even a shred of masculine self-respect remaining. Unfoftunately for this one it would appear that all vestiges of such a trait had long since been surrendered and purged.
Joe Joe
March 29th, 2016 @ 9:32 pm

There are apparently two types of transgenders: a tiny group (10%) of very effeminate gay men, who may truly be gender disphoric; and the majority (90%) are STRAIGHT men who are autogynephilic. The effeminate gay men are in fact the kind of trans. who feel that they have always been female and have a childhood (prepubescent) history of preferences for all things girly. The straight autogynephiles don’t have those childhood experiences (although they will often revise their own histories later). The autogynephile starts getting turned on by himself in women’s clothing during puberty, when he starts masturbating wearing women’s clothing. The straight autogynephile may be a cross dresser or cross dressing masturbator for years, until the problem gets acute, usually in middle age, right around the mid life crisis.

An effeminate gay man may or may not dress in women’s clothing, but the straight autogynephile always does–he needs to for auto erotic stimulation–and the clothing is always the most sexy, provocative clothing he can get away with. While the effeminate gay man is dressing to conform with how he feels internally, the straight autogynephile is dressing to conform to his straight male view of the erotic (pornographic) woman. Instead of making an erotic female sculpture, the straight autogynephile is sculpting himself.

The “cure” for the effeminate gay man may be surgery, and he is the type that would probably be no danger to women in a rest room. His erotic target has always been men and continues to be.

But the “cure” for the latter may be drastic testosterone removal, and supplementation with viagra for sexual relations with one’s wife. The autogynephile–90% of transsexuals–are STRAIGHT and their erotic object is women. They are narcissistic, love attention, and are jealous of the real women they are not. The autogynephile is the LAST person you want in a women’s restroom.
Joe Joe
March 29th, 2016 @ 9:40 pm

She may have been right. The trans agenda is coming right out of feminism and LGBT. When enough males overrun female public spaces–like restrooms and showers–women and girls will have to stay home for their own safety. In the same way that the CIA trained the Taliban (and look at how they treat women), the CIA seems to have been training trans/LGBT/feminism to drive real women out of the public square. Burqas, anyone?

Oh, and Gloria Steinem?
Joe Joe
March 29th, 2016 @ 9:45 pm

Actually, if you read her blog, they were having an active sex life until his obsession with becoming a woman kicked in. Then, he had no time for any woman but himself.
Liza
March 29th, 2016 @ 9:48 pm

Yes exactly everything you said. Except the 90% also get off in exhibitionism–Lady Face in public , attention whoring and demanding women recognize them as “women”. It is basically forcing women to role play in heterosexual men sexual arousal triggers in public and against women’s will. Their is also a lot of narcissistic male rage and a mosaic personality disorder. They also target children with easily influenced parents because pushing the laws claiming all the little baby Trans need to be in the girls rooms may distract people from noticing what is going on. They are very violent. They send all kinds of people death threats and harass and threaten suicide. It is the most toxic and violent group on the American Landscape. I do not know how they got this far and how to push back these bathroom laws–they will harm women and girls–no doubt about it and then girls will be told they can’t say anything because the little princess will kill himself or she risks total social isolation from peers because this movement uses social isolation against people as a tactic. Horrible and dangerous.
Joe Joe
March 29th, 2016 @ 9:57 pm

You’re right on target. The problem is that this information has not gotten out. All we have is the PC version, which is almost a complete lie (except for the 10% who are very effeminate gay men.)

LGBT types will tell you that this theory of autogynephilia has been debunked by a 1995 study on the brains of men, women, and transsexuals. The study found that in a tiny part of the brain, transsexuals were more like women: unfortunately for that theory, a 2007 study reexamined the data and found that the transsexuals tested in 1995 were ALREADY ON FEMALE HORMONES at the time of the study. That makes the study completely useless for transsexuals.

(Tell your liberal friends that (Lawrence, 2007b) debunks the 1995 study by Zhou et al.)

In other words, transsexuals (for the most part) are NOT essentially women and
do not have a woman’s brain. They are mentally ill straight men.
riverlifecallie
March 29th, 2016 @ 10:21 pm

“Shut up,” she explained.
Liza
March 29th, 2016 @ 10:26 pm

And what if was the other way. The Gay movement proceeded Feminism by 20 years. People just did not know about it. The first feminist came out of the gay movement as they men were deeply uninterested they brought it forward–and then the Freidan et al showed up and put a more pleasant face on it.
Liza
March 29th, 2016 @ 10:43 pm

You are right but everything is howling shrieking bigot hater and you can’t dare publish a thing against them–nobody will touch anything Transcritical. They destroy peoples lives with impunity. The thing is I do not think they can sustain themsleves because it is a fetish and a compulsion and so destructive. All their tales of victimization are nearly total lies People do not fact check. So they claim the biggest victims–all murdered every second–they each dies a 1000 deaths a year. It is the 10% and black ones working as prostitutes that get are killed. They constantly claim 1 in 12 is murdered here are my weak math skills. US Population is 321.3 Million

Transgender are 0.5% (from their source) so the US population of transgender is 1,606,500

20 Transgender women murdered a year (their source none in the locker or bathroom) so the

the chances a Transgender women being murdered is 1 out of 80,325
They seemed to have raped and killed over 1000 mostly women and kids. And also not a few men either. Rage driven. The APA should be held to some account for releasing it on children.
Joe Joe
March 29th, 2016 @ 10:56 pm

Do you have a link on that?