The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

The Deadly Menace of Fake Boobs

Posted on | December 21, 2011 | 20 Comments

Some critics have dismissed my oft-stated preference for natural breasts as mere ignorant bigotry against artficial enhancement, but now at last I’ve been vindicated by science:

Thousands of women ‘should’
have breast implants removed
Around 45,000 British women are known to have had Poly Implant Prothese (PIP) implants, which have since been found to have contained industrial silicone and have not passed medical regulations.
Authorities in France are expected to call in all women there who have been given PIP implants in order to have them removed and replaced.
British experts said that women here should consider having them removed for ‘peace of mind’ as they have a high risk of leaking.
Investigations have been conducted after some suspicious cases of cancer were found in women with the implants . . .

Thanks to Dan Collins for the e-mail tip. There should be no need to remind readers that Dr. Collins and I are co-founders of The Collins-McCain Institute for Therapeutic Breast Staring, and are available to assist or advise America’s women in all matters breast-related.

THE COLLINS-McCAIN INSTITUTE
We’re Here for You.  Because We Care.™

Category: Science

Comments

20 Responses to “The Deadly Menace of Fake Boobs”

  1. Anonymous
    December 21st, 2011 @ 3:59 pm

    I’m in your club. Nat boobs or none at all!

  2. Dell Hill
    December 21st, 2011 @ 4:49 pm

    Reposted – in the interest of women’s health, of course – over at my place.

  3. Anonymous
    December 21st, 2011 @ 5:01 pm

    I think of it as a public-service announcement.

  4. Boobs in the News
    December 21st, 2011 @ 5:16 pm

    […] chronicled at Stacy’s place, doctors in the UK are advising that tens of thousands of women have their silicone breast implants […]

  5. Lance McCormick
    December 21st, 2011 @ 5:33 pm

    This post is worthless without images.

  6. Dan Collins
    December 21st, 2011 @ 5:34 pm

    Consider 3 foods never to eat your illustration.

  7. Dan Collins
    December 21st, 2011 @ 5:35 pm

    And while I’m on the subject . . . do you know what hitting Stacy’s tip jar is? A Mutually Beneficial Relationship.

  8. JeffS
    December 21st, 2011 @ 5:49 pm

    I volunteer my services to screen female breasts to insure their continued safe function. 

    No charge, I am merely concerned for the welfare of my fellow (female) human beings. 

    I merely ask that pictures (in color, and covering from the waist  to the top of the head) be sent with the appointment request, so that I can, ummmmmm, prioritize my workload.

  9. Dell Hill
    December 21st, 2011 @ 5:54 pm

    And, if you noticed, that’s exactly how it was reposted – as a public service for women’s health world-wide.

  10. Anonymous
    December 21st, 2011 @ 5:59 pm

    We’re counting on Bob Belvedere to handle the photographic side of this story.

  11. jwallin
    December 21st, 2011 @ 6:23 pm

    More than a handful’s a waste.

  12. kellsbells
    December 21st, 2011 @ 6:30 pm

    Here’s a little TMI, but, it’s my nature. So I actually got a reduction. But can you believe the bozo doc wanted to “fill” the girls out with some silicone? I told him, hey! double DD is plenty big! Yes, they are real and yes, they are fabulous 🙂

  13. Garym
    December 21st, 2011 @ 6:40 pm

    How about if a double mastectomy were involved and wife wanted to feel like a woman?
    Also, I agree, real is/are much better.

  14. kellsbells
    December 21st, 2011 @ 7:34 pm

    Gary, any gal that’s had a mastectomy deserves to have the tits of her dreams. Sadly, I have penis envy and I don’t think that could be arranged…..

  15. Charles
    December 21st, 2011 @ 7:38 pm

    I saw what you did there:
    Category: Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, Democrats

    The Deadly Menace of Fake Boobs

  16. Garym
    December 21st, 2011 @ 7:57 pm

    Dooohhhh!!

  17. K-Bob
    December 21st, 2011 @ 11:43 pm

    Does this mean I have to sell off my inventory of (ahem) “Woodeze” silicone sealer and ZipLoc® sandwich baggies?

  18. Adjoran
    December 22nd, 2011 @ 12:41 am

    Count me in the “prefers natural to bigger” group, but I always liked Adam Corolla’s snap line:  “If I can touch them, they are real.”

  19. M. Thompson
    December 22nd, 2011 @ 1:36 am

    I’m quite sure we all would much rather have natural to bigger, unless she’s a cancer survivor who wants what she used to have back.

  20. Quartermaster
    December 22nd, 2011 @ 8:26 am

    natural for me too.

    Your motto “We’re Here for You.  Because We Care.™” needs some work. Just doesn’t have the ring of “We Scare because we care.” How about “We stare because we care.” Not all that original, but sounds better.