The Other McCain

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More Arizona Sex Freaks in the News

Posted on | February 14, 2014 | 7 Comments

After we recounted the case of allegedly incestuous Tucson teacher Christine Mazzarella — “Yeesh,” says Dan Riehl — one of our commenters pointed out that there have been several other strange sex-crime cases in Arizona lately. In case you’ve forgotten, sociopath “Dr. Essay Anne Vanderbilt” (neé Stephen Krol) chose Gilbert, Arizona, as the scene of her final fraud, so it could be that the state is becoming a sort of weirdo-magnet, like Florida. Anyway, here are a couple of recent bizarre stories from Arizona:

Double trouble for Rudy Torres, 24, and Juan Sahagun, 21. Police say the two suspects didn’t know each other, but they had something in common: Both of them were having sex with the same underage girl. They met her via the Internet and apparently the two-timing Tucson teen temptress liked Juan better, because he was charged with seven counts, while Rudy was only charged with four.

While the Latino lotharios were getting lessons in the meaning of the word “jailbait,” a teenage boy was learning the word “cougar”:

Pinal County Sheriff’s officials say 34-year-old Keri Gonzalez was arrested after she jumped out a second-story window when the mother of a 15-year-old boy found Gonzalez naked in her son’s bedroom.

Gonzalez, who broke her ankle in her bid for escape, was arrested on a charge of sexual misconduct with a minor and “also is being held on suspicion of providing false information to a peace officer.” The boy’s mother “told authorities that she had previously warned Gonzalez to stay away from her son.”

Allegedly — did I forget to include the word “allegedly”? Because the alleged boy-banging window-jumper says she is not guilty:

An Arizona woman accused of jumping out of a window naked after having sex with a 15-year-old boy says the allegations are untrue.
“That’s not what I am at all,” Keri Gonzalez, 34, told Fox 10. . . .
Gonzalez told Fox 10 . . .  her own son went to the teen’s home to see a girl who also lived there. Once there, she says:

“We were talking and hanging out and one of the guys that was around 18 was pushing me onto the 15-year-old and continued to do it over 10 times and I was just trying to get my keys from them and leave. I said I had a headache and they gave me something and then I started feeling really weird and dizzy and they were like, you can come lay down and so they showed me up to a room.. woke up to banging and screaming at the door and it was the boy’s mom and when I woke up, I didn’t have pants on and while he was talking to her, I jumped out the two story window because I didn’t even know what was going on in my mind at the time. If I was in my right mind, I wouldn’t have jumped out the window.”

Uh . . . yeah, whatever you say, Keri.

FOX 10 News |


Lots of innocent people just start “hanging out” and then wake up naked in a teenager’s room. Although I am not a lawyer, my advice would be, if the prosecutor offers a plea bargain, take the deal.



7 Responses to “More Arizona Sex Freaks in the News”

  1. ThomasD
    February 14th, 2014 @ 8:22 pm

    What’s with the cloth around the neck in all these AZ mug shots?

    Some new policy?

  2. DaveO
    February 14th, 2014 @ 8:32 pm

    Tucson has the highest concentration of Democrats in Arizona. Pinal County is Republican, but the Democrats are using the Colorado blueprint of rebranding hardcore Dems as Republicans in order to take over the county. Anyone mapping these outbreaks of child-sex-plague?

  3. Zohydro
    February 14th, 2014 @ 8:58 pm

    Covering the gang tats?

  4. RS
    February 15th, 2014 @ 7:45 am

    . . .We were talking and hanging out and one of the guys that was around 18 was pushing me onto the 15-year-old and continued to do it over 10 times . . .

    A million to one shot, doc. Honest!

  5. skhpcola
    February 15th, 2014 @ 7:04 pm

    She doesn’t look too bad with make-up and her hair did, but sumbitch, does she have lunatic eyes. The cray cray is pouring off of her in tsunami-sized waves.

  6. Kirby McCain
    February 15th, 2014 @ 9:00 pm

    Keri Gonzales is a slut. A over the hill stripper living in section 8 housing slinging Xanax and booze to teenage horndogs. Just a guess.

  7. Russians: What the Puck? | Regular Right Guy
    February 16th, 2014 @ 2:21 pm

    […] More Arizona Sex Freaks in the News […]