A. Charles Johnson

Posted on | June 27, 2010 | 106 Comments

Q. What’s more boring than soccer?

We might assume, arguendo, that regular readers have been following The Other McCain’s relentless mockery of the 2010 World Cup. However, for those who may have joined the mockery in progress and missed the set-up for this particular running gag, let’s recall how liberals have portrayed American contempt for soccer as inherently racist:

“I was reminded about why when the United States wins in international tournaments, it can bring a nasty undercurrent in its wake. . . .
“It’s yet another reminder why it is so important for progressives to not just thrill to the joys of sport but be conversant in the politics of sports. The right will forever try to pump the worst kind of racist, nationalist garbage through our play, even at moments that by all rights should be above and beyond politics and just about the electric thrill of the moment.”
— David Zirin, The Nation, June 23

Anyone who has read Thomas Sowell’s The Vision of the Anointed (as everyone should) recognizes in this a signature trope of elitist liberalism: “We are enlightened and sophisticated, whereas conservatives are benighted and bigoted.”

Sowell summarizes the danger of this tendency in his book’s subtitle: Self-Congratulation as a Basis for Social Policy. That is to say, liberals support certain policies not because those policies are demonstrably effective, but because supporting such policies makes liberals feel good about themselves.

This nonsense about conservatives hating soccer because we are xenophobic jingos is merely a variation on the argument that conservative opposition to nationalized health-care is motivated by racism. The liberal worldview needs to be mocked, and often, and by someone who knows how, which was the primary motivation of World Cup Fever — Catch It! — here:

6/13: World Cup Overkill: Associated Press Writes 1,068 Words About 1-1 Tie
6/14: Soccer May Be Gay, But At Least It’s Not Canadian
6/18: U.S. Robbed of Winning Goal in World Cup Soccer Game vs. Slovenia
6/20: The Goal That Wasn’t
6/22: World Cup: ¡Va La Argentina!
6/23: USA! USA! USA!
6/24: VIDEO: The Miracle on Grass
6/26: Sad Ending for USA in the Quadrennial ‘Let’s Make Fun of Foreigners’ Festival

This recap is not necessitated by any need to allay fears that I’m turning into a soccer-loving elitist faggot, but rather to set up the punchline:

At one point in our Twitter exchange, Johnson used the term “wetback,” and asked what slur I would apply to the Ghana team.

This demonstrated that he did not recognize the premise of the joke, i.e., to employ derogatory terms for various nationalities — French “frogs,” Irish “micks,” Italian “dagos,” etc. — whereas Johnson had in mind racial slurs, which terms I had of course avoided. At one point, I asked readers to suggest an epithet for Algerians, a situation where generic anti-Arab terms would not do.

Charles Johnson is simply too dull-witted to get the joke. Members of the Mexican soccer team are obviously not “wetbacks,” a term referring specfically to illegal immigrants. If they were “wetbacks,” they’d be playing for the USA and voting for Obama. Had the U.S. team ever played Japan, I might have been in trouble, but we need not waste much thought on that moot possibility now that America’s World-Class Losers have been eliminated.

Too bad Charles Johnson didn’t seek my advice before contacting R. Emmett Tyrrell Jr., as I might have warned Charles that it has been a standard policy of The American Spectator since its inception to report all disgruntled letter-writers to the FBI for investigation as subversives.

We’ll wait and see whether I collect that $20 from Weigel.

UPDATE (Smitty): Clarification of “s32porchmanque” can be located here. Summary: ya got nothin’. Keep trying.

UPDATE II: Well played, Admiral, well played, indeed! Smitty’s penchant for Carrollesque word-play is notorious, as his authorship of Oedipotus Wrecks and Waiting for O-Dough demonstrates. His choice of monikers when installing SiteMeter for the new WordPress version of the blog was, perhaps, not what I would have advised. Yet he did not seek my advice, so I suppose he must suffer whatever pun-ishment is apt.

Johnson’s obsession with the SiteMeter calls attention to an interesting fact: Little Green Footballs does not display a SiteMeter link, so that no one can study LGF’s traffic trends. Whereas, as recently noted, June has been the Best. Month. Evah! hereabouts, and anyone can study the SiteMeter to analyze the trend.

While you’re mentally extrapolating November’s traffic based on a trend of April 106K to June 165K, take a gander at The Rules, a/k/a “How to Get a Million Hits.” Among the growth strategies advised is Rule 3: “Make Some Enemies.” So I guess that worked pretty good.

This recent drama — including an evidently authentic comment by Mad King Charles himself — occurred while I was briefly asleep. Donald Douglas at American Power displays the unfunny cartoon that one of the lizards composed.

We now have a Memeorandum thread, so I suppose I’ll be drinking free next time I run into Dave Weigel. Many conservatives have asked me about Dave — “How can you be friends with that dirtbag?” — and I admit that this is becoming a difficult thing to defend. But I’m averse to the Total Vengeance mode of blogging, the compiling of Enemies Lists, trying to get people fired, and so forth.

The propaganda of dehumanization, turning individuals into symbols — Emmanuel Goldstein in the Two-Minutes Hate — is what incites such episodes as Michelle Malkin being swarmed by an Alex Jones-led mob in Denver. Having been vilified in that manner, I don’t hate the player, I hate the game.

Charles Johnson has played the game so long that he has forgotten it’s a game. He is now just a semi-professional bully. As I said of his vindictive campaign against Pamela Geller, if CJ was a Sioux, his tribal name would be Fights With Girls.

Bullies are not attractive, except to people who admire sadism. And I wasn’t raised that way. Generosity and kindness ultimately triumph over selfish cruelty, and honesty over lies. I don’t owe Bob Belvedere a hat-tip for this lesson.

“And they went up on the breadth of the earth, and compassed the camp of the saints about, and the beloved city . . .”

We know how that story ends.

Category: Blogging, Charles Johnson, Foreigners, humor

Comments

106 Responses to “A. Charles Johnson”

Charles Johnson
June 27th, 2010 @ 11:47 pm

If I ever catch you impersonating me buzzsawmonkey you will rue the day. Figures I would find you here though, slumming with the wingnuts and raaaaacists.
Charles Johnson
June 27th, 2010 @ 7:47 pm

If I ever catch you impersonating me buzzsawmonkey you will rue the day. Figures I would find you here though, slumming with the wingnuts and raaaaacists.
Rodan
June 27th, 2010 @ 11:48 pm

RS,
I sent an email defending you to American Spectator.

I listed his support for Communists with links and his call for Abortions for Africans.

The Blogmocracy got you back!

Go Argentina!
Rodan
June 27th, 2010 @ 7:48 pm

RS,
I sent an email defending you to American Spectator.

I listed his support for Communists with links and his call for Abortions for Africans.

The Blogmocracy got you back!

Go Argentina!
Charles Johnson
June 27th, 2010 @ 11:50 pm

The heroic dear hero Barack Obama compared to Hilter. This is how wingnuts mock our leader.
Charles Johnson
June 27th, 2010 @ 7:50 pm

The heroic dear hero Barack Obama compared to Hilter. This is how wingnuts mock our leader.
song_and_dance_man
June 28th, 2010 @ 12:03 am

Foster – Master Projectionist in the Theater of the Absurd.
song_and_dance_man
June 27th, 2010 @ 8:03 pm

Foster – Master Projectionist in the Theater of the Absurd.
DEZ
June 28th, 2010 @ 12:10 am

RS, Chuckles is worried about your site traffic.
Just for the record, Google has something to say about it.
LGF Google Page Rank “4”
The Other McCain Google Page Rank, “6”
Poke him with a stick.
DEZ
June 27th, 2010 @ 8:10 pm

RS, Chuckles is worried about your site traffic.
Just for the record, Google has something to say about it.
LGF Google Page Rank “4”
The Other McCain Google Page Rank, “6”
Poke him with a stick.
buzzsawmonkey
June 28th, 2010 @ 12:46 am

If #26, posting as “Charles Johnson,” really is Mad King Yertle himself, then get this: YOU, in your fortified turtleswamp, have already falsely accused me of “impersonating you”—and (not for the first time) lied to your cultish slaves about it.

I came here, for the first time in my life, merely in order to set the record straight: I would not be caught dead impersonating you.

Since you seem to be trolling here, however, here’s some light reading for you. Enjoy:

Your Last Posting
(Los Angeles)

–apologies to Robert Browning and “My Last Duchess”

That’s your last posting ever on this blog,?
And henceforth your account is blocked. You’ll dog?
My site no further with your words; your nic
?Is banished, and I gave your posts the stick.?
You know I’ll call your banning here a “flounce”
Though I’ve been waiting for some time to pounce
On your account, and with prevarications
Distort and demonize your observations.
The Toad Hall where you reveled, if you please’ll
Be given entire to the stoats and weasels,
?My countenance beaming on each one that
Comes to me bearing tales of Mole or Rat,?
Or Badger, or…sockpuppet. No, ‘t was not?
This writing only, placed you on the spot?
And caused me to invoke the ban: perhaps?
You chanced to differ with my own claptrap
And stick to your position, or dispute
Conventional wisdoms to which repute?
I’ve lately granted. Don’t you dare to say?
That I or my site might have lost their way
Obsessing on my personal vendettas;
?I am neither forgiving nor forgetter,?
And will not brook a failure of obesiance?
By anyone I feel owes me allegiance.
Yes, I took Rather down, on grounds that he
Could not support what he claimed factually;
But now I set my sights at lower bar
(On personalities, not things that are)
While I squat ‘midst the wreckage I have made
Like mad Kurtz ruling from his bush stockade,
Ringed ’round with skulls. For I no longer deign
To weigh a fact itself; instead, maintain?
That source determines truth, and to that end
The nature of veracity I bend,
Citing to midden-heaps of rankness such?
That I would not long since have scorned to touch.?
A turtle is a lizard in a shell,
And I, lord of my self-created hell?
Remain King Yertle of the Turtle Stack
?Exalted on my Posting Turtles’ backs–
Yet conscious, as I proclaim my renown
?It’s just posting turtles, all the way down,
?Which is why I respond with rage and fear?
Should anyone mouth what I deem a sneer?
Or contradiction. So I flip a switch,
And all posts stop together, with a bitch?
Given reign of my elegant designs.?
Yet, if I still retained but half a spine?
I would despise appearing to be led?
As I now seem to, by the lesser head.?
Hark! Look you! See how Glenn Beck weeps!?
Do you not loathe the company he keeps
Regardless of whatever he might say?
Here is the global warming word today; ?
Do not dissent, the banning stick is toward
I care for no voice save that of accord!
buzzsawmonkey
June 27th, 2010 @ 8:46 pm

If #26, posting as “Charles Johnson,” really is Mad King Yertle himself, then get this: YOU, in your fortified turtleswamp, have already falsely accused me of “impersonating you”—and (not for the first time) lied to your cultish slaves about it.

I came here, for the first time in my life, merely in order to set the record straight: I would not be caught dead impersonating you.

Since you seem to be trolling here, however, here’s some light reading for you. Enjoy:

Your Last Posting
(Los Angeles)

–apologies to Robert Browning and “My Last Duchess”

That’s your last posting ever on this blog,?
And henceforth your account is blocked. You’ll dog?
My site no further with your words; your nic
?Is banished, and I gave your posts the stick.?
You know I’ll call your banning here a “flounce”
Though I’ve been waiting for some time to pounce
On your account, and with prevarications
Distort and demonize your observations.
The Toad Hall where you reveled, if you please’ll
Be given entire to the stoats and weasels,
?My countenance beaming on each one that
Comes to me bearing tales of Mole or Rat,?
Or Badger, or…sockpuppet. No, ‘t was not?
This writing only, placed you on the spot?
And caused me to invoke the ban: perhaps?
You chanced to differ with my own claptrap
And stick to your position, or dispute
Conventional wisdoms to which repute?
I’ve lately granted. Don’t you dare to say?
That I or my site might have lost their way
Obsessing on my personal vendettas;
?I am neither forgiving nor forgetter,?
And will not brook a failure of obesiance?
By anyone I feel owes me allegiance.
Yes, I took Rather down, on grounds that he
Could not support what he claimed factually;
But now I set my sights at lower bar
(On personalities, not things that are)
While I squat ‘midst the wreckage I have made
Like mad Kurtz ruling from his bush stockade,
Ringed ’round with skulls. For I no longer deign
To weigh a fact itself; instead, maintain?
That source determines truth, and to that end
The nature of veracity I bend,
Citing to midden-heaps of rankness such?
That I would not long since have scorned to touch.?
A turtle is a lizard in a shell,
And I, lord of my self-created hell?
Remain King Yertle of the Turtle Stack
?Exalted on my Posting Turtles’ backs–
Yet conscious, as I proclaim my renown
?It’s just posting turtles, all the way down,
?Which is why I respond with rage and fear?
Should anyone mouth what I deem a sneer?
Or contradiction. So I flip a switch,
And all posts stop together, with a bitch?
Given reign of my elegant designs.?
Yet, if I still retained but half a spine?
I would despise appearing to be led?
As I now seem to, by the lesser head.?
Hark! Look you! See how Glenn Beck weeps!?
Do you not loathe the company he keeps
Regardless of whatever he might say?
Here is the global warming word today; ?
Do not dissent, the banning stick is toward
I care for no voice save that of accord!
buzzsawmonkey
June 28th, 2010 @ 12:52 am

Odd. A few extra question marks seem to have mysteriously appeared through the magic of cut and paste.
buzzsawmonkey
June 27th, 2010 @ 8:52 pm

Odd. A few extra question marks seem to have mysteriously appeared through the magic of cut and paste.
song_and_dance_man
June 28th, 2010 @ 12:56 am

buzz

No matter- the content and message was not harmed.
song_and_dance_man
June 27th, 2010 @ 8:56 pm

buzz

No matter- the content and message was not harmed.
Charles Johnson
June 28th, 2010 @ 1:10 am

Damn you buzzsawmonkey, you are banned from the internets! You insolent cur.
Charles Johnson
June 27th, 2010 @ 9:10 pm

Damn you buzzsawmonkey, you are banned from the internets! You insolent cur.
Charles Johnson
June 27th, 2010 @ 9:20 pm

Since white supremacist blogger Robert Stacy McCain has been tweeting all day about how little traffic he received from my link to his hate hole (which makes sense, because decent people don’t want to visit racist websites), I thought I’d check to see if he had a Sitemeter account, and have a look at his traffic numbers. Turnabout’s fair play, right?

For the record, he’s been letting people post comments using my name (classy!), except when it is me, but trust me I monitor it regularly to keep on top of it, and deleting any comments criticial of him, except when it is me, and one of the people who used my name at his site posted a link to LGF. Total number of visits from that link: 6. Yes, that’s SIX. Which is, uh, pathetic. I can gin up a dozen easy. That is just how good I am.

But even more interesting, when I searched his source code for “sitemeter,” I discovered the username he registered for his Sitemeter account:

s32porchmanque

Well, isn’t that lovely. “Porch Monkey.” A disgusting Southern slur for black people. McCain obviously thought he was being clever. Oh wait, manque means this.

In the racist world of Robert Stacy McCain, this is what passes for good clean silly fun — just like calling Mexicans “beaners” and Brits “faggots,” and then trying to pass it off as a joke. I don’t read his hate site, I just post here occasionally, so I didn’t know that McCain and his sycophants have been laughing it up over their “porch monkey” joke for quite a while.

Strange how the “jokes” McCain finds so funny all seem to involve racist slurs.
Charles Johnson
June 28th, 2010 @ 1:20 am

Since white supremacist blogger Robert Stacy McCain has been tweeting all day about how little traffic he received from my link to his hate hole (which makes sense, because decent people don’t want to visit racist websites), I thought I’d check to see if he had a Sitemeter account, and have a look at his traffic numbers. Turnabout’s fair play, right?

For the record, he’s been letting people post comments using my name (classy!), except when it is me, but trust me I monitor it regularly to keep on top of it, and deleting any comments criticial of him, except when it is me, and one of the people who used my name at his site posted a link to LGF. Total number of visits from that link: 6. Yes, that’s SIX. Which is, uh, pathetic. I can gin up a dozen easy. That is just how good I am.

But even more interesting, when I searched his source code for “sitemeter,” I discovered the username he registered for his Sitemeter account:

s32porchmanque

Well, isn’t that lovely. “Porch Monkey.” A disgusting Southern slur for black people. McCain obviously thought he was being clever. Oh wait, manque means this.

In the racist world of Robert Stacy McCain, this is what passes for good clean silly fun — just like calling Mexicans “beaners” and Brits “faggots,” and then trying to pass it off as a joke. I don’t read his hate site, I just post here occasionally, so I didn’t know that McCain and his sycophants have been laughing it up over their “porch monkey” joke for quite a while.

Strange how the “jokes” McCain finds so funny all seem to involve racist slurs.
Carolina Girl
June 28th, 2010 @ 1:48 am

Oh, Snowball, Snowball….let us not remember your little troll KKKilgore Trout leaving his little turds on the Hot Air website and you opening your lizard arms to welcome him back in the fold and justifying his actions.

And the misgynist rape fantasies of one Cato the Elder anytime the name Sarah Palin is mentioned. Yeah, you run a class outfit.

By the way, are you linked ANYWHERE anymore?
Carolina Girl
June 27th, 2010 @ 9:48 pm

Oh, Snowball, Snowball….let us not remember your little troll KKKilgore Trout leaving his little turds on the Hot Air website and you opening your lizard arms to welcome him back in the fold and justifying his actions.

And the misgynist rape fantasies of one Cato the Elder anytime the name Sarah Palin is mentioned. Yeah, you run a class outfit.

By the way, are you linked ANYWHERE anymore?
Kilgore Trout
June 28th, 2010 @ 1:49 am

Ready to man battle stations Lord Charles. Do you want me to tweet someone? Or should I sneak in and post some racist comments in the night to show what a racist RSM and the wingnuts are? Anything for you my liege.
Kilgore Trout
June 27th, 2010 @ 9:49 pm

Ready to man battle stations Lord Charles. Do you want me to tweet someone? Or should I sneak in and post some racist comments in the night to show what a racist RSM and the wingnuts are? Anything for you my liege.
Kilgore Trout
June 28th, 2010 @ 1:51 am

Charles, I pledge I will not let you down like Sharmuta and Wild Irish Rose did. But they are women and do not understand real men like us.
Kilgore Trout
June 27th, 2010 @ 9:51 pm

Charles, I pledge I will not let you down like Sharmuta and Wild Irish Rose did. But they are women and do not understand real men like us.
CGHill
June 28th, 2010 @ 1:53 am

CJ @26: At least you got the correct number of A’s in “raaaaacist.”
CGHill
June 27th, 2010 @ 9:53 pm

CJ @26: At least you got the correct number of A’s in “raaaaacist.”
The Osprey
June 28th, 2010 @ 2:09 am

So, Charles Johnson, the net.dweeb that always moans about “stalkers” is examining the html code of RSM’s webpage for traces of raaaaaacism??? (Did I get the number of “a”s right?)

I think that makes you the codestalker, Chuckles.
The Osprey
June 27th, 2010 @ 10:09 pm

So, Charles Johnson, the net.dweeb that always moans about “stalkers” is examining the html code of RSM’s webpage for traces of raaaaaacism??? (Did I get the number of “a”s right?)

I think that makes you the codestalker, Chuckles.
Rush
June 28th, 2010 @ 4:06 am

What’s up with the disingenuous smear tactics, Charles? You once made me an honorary Lizardoid, then did a 180 and attempted to use quotes from years before that to smear I, the great El Rushbo. Could it be that you’re just an opportunistic, intellectually dishonest, self-serving, middle-aged loon with no core values? Thought so.
Rush
June 28th, 2010 @ 12:06 am

What’s up with the disingenuous smear tactics, Charles? You once made me an honorary Lizardoid, then did a 180 and attempted to use quotes from years before that to smear I, the great El Rushbo. Could it be that you’re just an opportunistic, intellectually dishonest, self-serving, middle-aged loon with no core values? Thought so.
Observer
June 28th, 2010 @ 4:09 am

The Husky Blogger has the hots for you, and is soliciting for helpers to get involved in a twitter campaign.

He seems like the emotional equivalent of a thirteen year old girl.

Yeah, Husky Blogger…you go, girl.
Observer
June 28th, 2010 @ 12:09 am

The Husky Blogger has the hots for you, and is soliciting for helpers to get involved in a twitter campaign.

He seems like the emotional equivalent of a thirteen year old girl.

Yeah, Husky Blogger…you go, girl.
Dave C
June 28th, 2010 @ 4:35 am

Something about CJ’s constant claims of racism– excuse me– of RAAAAACISM reminds me something Ace said.

When your only tool is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
Dave C
June 28th, 2010 @ 12:35 am

Something about CJ’s constant claims of racism– excuse me– of RAAAAACISM reminds me something Ace said.

When your only tool is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
TR Sterling
June 28th, 2010 @ 5:18 am

Stacy,
Success! Goal! Demand the $20.
Your thread is on memeorandum as if one hour ago.
You changed the subject bro!
Sleep well troubadour.
TR Sterling
June 28th, 2010 @ 1:18 am

Stacy,
Success! Goal! Demand the $20.
Your thread is on memeorandum as if one hour ago.
You changed the subject bro!
Sleep well troubadour.
Chuckles the Clown
June 28th, 2010 @ 6:40 am

I demand a retraction! My words were taken out of context. You shifty devils.
Chuckles the Clown
June 28th, 2010 @ 2:40 am

I demand a retraction! My words were taken out of context. You shifty devils.
DaveP.
June 28th, 2010 @ 9:17 am

“Porch monkey”?

Someone here needs to pull up Clerks 2 on Netflicks…
DaveP.
June 28th, 2010 @ 5:17 am

“Porch monkey”?

Someone here needs to pull up Clerks 2 on Netflicks…
Robert Stacy McCain
June 28th, 2010 @ 11:05 am

Perhaps Smitty was thinking of that now-forgotten ghey pron classic, “Porsche Man Key.” NTTAWWT.
Robert Stacy McCain
June 28th, 2010 @ 7:05 am

Perhaps Smitty was thinking of that now-forgotten ghey pron classic, “Porsche Man Key.” NTTAWWT.
Robert Stacy McCain
June 28th, 2010 @ 11:13 am

And, just in case anyone hasn’t figured it out, Charles Johnson’s repetitive application of various “hate” labels to this blog is an attempt to deprive me of gainful employment and/or advertising revenue. This is of a piece with his repeated attachment of “Nazi” and “fascist” to the names of Geller, Spencer, et al.

Johnson does these things not as a childish Godwin’s Law stunt, but with full knowledge of the damage he seeks to inflict.

It’s the sadism, stupid.
Robert Stacy McCain
June 28th, 2010 @ 7:13 am

And, just in case anyone hasn’t figured it out, Charles Johnson’s repetitive application of various “hate” labels to this blog is an attempt to deprive me of gainful employment and/or advertising revenue. This is of a piece with his repeated attachment of “Nazi” and “fascist” to the names of Geller, Spencer, et al.

Johnson does these things not as a childish Godwin’s Law stunt, but with full knowledge of the damage he seeks to inflict.

It’s the sadism, stupid.
Jay Tea
June 28th, 2010 @ 11:42 am

I am reminded of the recent discussion vis-a-vis Wiegel and JournoList, and how the internet is making the documentation of “actual malice” considerably easier — which means that libel/slander lawsuits could be more fruitful. It’s clear, RSM, that Charles Johnson does hold considerable hostility for you — which could go a long ways towards reaching that “actual malice” standard.

And now you’re talking about how his actions could cause you real harm…

J.
Jay Tea
June 28th, 2010 @ 7:42 am

I am reminded of the recent discussion vis-a-vis Wiegel and JournoList, and how the internet is making the documentation of “actual malice” considerably easier — which means that libel/slander lawsuits could be more fruitful. It’s clear, RSM, that Charles Johnson does hold considerable hostility for you — which could go a long ways towards reaching that “actual malice” standard.

And now you’re talking about how his actions could cause you real harm…

J.
Peter
June 28th, 2010 @ 12:19 pm

if CJ was a Sioux, his tribal name would be Fights With Girls

And if Obama were a Sioux, his tribal name would be Worse Than Carter.
Peter
June 28th, 2010 @ 8:19 am

if CJ was a Sioux, his tribal name would be Fights With Girls

And if Obama were a Sioux, his tribal name would be Worse Than Carter.

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The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

A. Charles Johnson

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