Dear NYPD …
Posted on | September 30, 2011 | 47 Comments
NYPD resisted the temptation to kill this Commie douchenozzle
Permit me to praise you, courageous officers of the New York Police Department, for your admirable restraint in dealing with the smelly Marxist scum currently infesting your city.
While I haven’t previously bothered to grant any underserved publicity to the vermin involved in the “Occupy Wall Street” protests, I did notice some accusations of “police brutality.” For a few minutes Sunday, I wrestled with a sudden and nearly overwhelming urge to write an article recommending Medals of Meritorious Service for any NYPD officer who billy-clubbed or pepper-sprayed one of those protest pests.
My notorious tendency toward sarcastic hyperbole was resisted, however, until today Moe Lane linked an article by a progressive blogger praising the anti-capitalist creeps.
“The protesters are what you’d expect, a kind of hippie dippie group of students, anti-globalization activists, and antiwar movement actors. . . . They believe themselves to represent all Americans who are frustrated by politics and finance. Whether or not this is true, what is happening is that there is a belief that their actions matter, that they themselves are moral beings who have dignity and power simply by the very act of self-expression.”
– Matt Stoller, “former Senior Policy Advisor to Rep. Alan Grayson and a fellow at the Roosevelt Institute”
What super-human willpower your officers have hitherto exerted is now so apparent that I am compelled to send you this note of praise.
Also, speaking on behalf of decent Americans everywhere, I wish to offer in advance my sympathies for whichever member of your riot squad is the first to break under the unbearable strain. We hope the NYCPBA has provided counseling to officers struggling against the temptation to engage in the “very act of self-expression” by whipping out their 9mm Glocks, emptying the magazine into these advocates of “civil disobedience,” re-loading with a fresh clip, and continuing to fire for effect so long as there is ammunition available and fresh targets in sight.
However, there is only so much that can be accomplished by psychological counseling, and not even the iron discipline of the NYPD can forever suppress the basic instinct that will, I know, finally unleash the pent-up fury the hard-working men and women of your force must feel toward the “Occupy Wall Street” protesters. Whether the result is merely a few hippie skulls busted by baton-wielding officers or, as I greatly fear, something more like the Ohio National Guard’s historic 1970 victory over Viet Cong sympathizers at Kent State, I just want to say to the officers involved in the unfortunate incident: We understand. We care. We’re here for you.
Sure that I speak on behalf of a grateful nation, I remain
Sincerely yours,
Robert Stacy McCain

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