The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

Yalie Aspires to ‘Change … What Heterosexual Sex Looks Like’

Posted on | June 25, 2014 | 24 Comments

Alexandra Brodsky (@azbrodsky) writes a lot about rape:

When someone attempted to rape me my freshman year, I asked my college, Yale University, for help, but instead I was basically advised to keep quiet. I shouldn’t formally report the assault, I was told. Despite my clear and repeated “no”, school administrators cast the whole event as a misunderstanding among friends.

In other words, the administration at Yale is pro-rape. This is the point of her anecdote, and if you are skeptical of Brodsky’s implication that officials of this elite institution do not take attempted rape seriously, then you must be pro-rape, too.

Without any knowledge of the details of the incident Brodsky describes, I suspect that — contrary to her implication — Yale officials were (and are) enormously sympathetic to the plight of Brodsky and other students like her. The problem, however, is that these types of incidents are typically a “he said/she said” situation, where she says she was the victim of an assault, he denies it and, because there are no witnesses or relevant evidence, it is impossible to determine guilt as a matter of criminal law. What can school officials do in such a situation? Stipulate that Brodsky is telling the truth about her “clear and repeated no”; also, however, stipulate that the incident did not actually result in intercourse. What is the difference between “attempted rape” and “she said no, so I stopped”?

Again, I don’t know the details of the particular case, but if Yale officials who did know the details saw it as “a misunderstanding among friends,” why? This question remains unanwswered, but Alexandra Brodsky is one of several plaintiffs in a federal civil rights lawsuit against Yale, and she now writes about rape with such frequency that some might say she’s parlayed this one incident into a career.

In a recent column at Feministing, Brodsky recounted a series of morning-after complaints she says she’s heard from women:

I don’t know. I mean, it’s not that bad, but he did that thing where he kept trying to negotiate with me when I said I wouldn’t sleep with him.
It’s not that bad, but when I wanted to leave he called me a cunt and blockaded his door.
It’s not that bad, but he was really rough, like choking shit, even after I told him it was too much.
It’s not that bad, but he took off the condom without telling me halfway through.

Complaint Number One is not a description of a crime. “Trying to negotiate” after an initial refusal is not attempted rape; otherwise the prison overcrowding problem would be even worse than it is.

Complaint Number Two is probably not a crime, either. It might be evidence that you’re dating a dangerous psychopath, but as long as you escaped without physical injury, you are not the victim of a crime. Are we going to start locking up every guy who slams doors and says rude things when he’s angry? And should we also lock up women who do the same thing?

Complaint Number Three is evidence that the guy you’re dating has watched too much porn and also may be a dangerous psychopath.

Complaint Number Four is evidence that you’re dating a liar.

It seems to me that Miss Brodsky may be trying to tell us that guys at Yale are all lying psychopaths who watch too much porn. Something about those high SAT scores just makes guys weird, I guess.

She’s not willing to stop there, however. No, sir. Miss Brodsky works herself up into a paroxysm of feminist fury that concludes thus:

But this isn’t a contained infection. We can’t just cut it out. It’s a cancer, a pernicious proliferation of what we already are: the “not that bad” is cordoned off from “real violence” only for our own convenience. So we will have to disrupt the whole body, and though all men can help, most won’t want to. Today’s allies might think it’s easy not to be a rapist but find it harder to accept that their desires are not paramount. The flowchart is less appealing when it demands, in successive boxes, Do you believe you are entitled to the fulfillment of your fantasies? Do you believe the women who refuse to oblige deprive you unjustly? Do you believe sex is yours? You do. You do.
It won’t be pretty or comfortable to change not only what heterosexual sex looks like but who gets to judge it and who is allowed to be angry in the morning. Who is allowed to stop excusing and forgiving and so who is no longer–endlessly, endlessly–forgiven and excused.

Suggestion: Maybe you should get yourself some cats, Miss Brodsky.

As for you single guys out there — especially you porn-addicted psychopaths at Yale — let me offer some advice: Assume that every girl you meet is a radical lesbian feminist. This is a pretty safe bet at Yale, probably, but if you happen to encounter a woman who seems interested in you, despite the fact that you have a penis, act as if you are surprised. React with stunned disbelief.

“What? You’re heterosexual? You’re kidding me, right? I mean, sure, I find you very attractive, personally, but when I pointed you out to my friends, they all said you look like a total lesbian.”

Will that work as a pick-up line? I don’t know, but at least you’ll have some interesting conversations. And if she’s absolutely determined to prove she’s heterosexual — hey, that’s consent, buddy.



24 Responses to “Yalie Aspires to ‘Change … What Heterosexual Sex Looks Like’”

  1. Jason Lee
    June 25th, 2014 @ 7:24 pm

    Too much freedom, too much responsibility, too much insecurity: Alexandra Brodsky would never admit it, but deep down she clearly wants to be part of a puritanical or Victorian society. Or a family with a strong patriarch. The long term side effects of the “Sexual Revolution” are driving young women crazy.

  2. Evi L. Bloggerlady
    June 25th, 2014 @ 7:27 pm

    #2 and #3 are both crimes. #2 is unlawful detention (the blocking of the door). #3 is assault (at a minimum). #4 is potentially a crime of assault (if he had an STD).

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  4. robertstacymccain
    June 25th, 2014 @ 7:40 pm

    Well, #3 is nothing I’ve ever been interested in, but this brutal BDSM-style stuff seems to be trendy with young people. If you want to throw all those freaks in jail, fine with me.

    As I said, #2 strikes me as evidence of a psychopathic personality. The possessive rage, the use of vile insults — guys who act like that are dangerous. However, as we all know, many girls go for the Bad Boy type, and who am I to tell them they shouldn’t have that choice? But again, as with #3, if you want to lock up every ill-tempered lout who commits #2, I won’t object, except to point out that door-slamming and cussing are fairly common in domestic quarrels.

  5. Evi L. Bloggerlady
    June 25th, 2014 @ 7:47 pm

    I know you are being tongue in cheek (the old fashioned idiom, not some new piercing term), but it has been illegal for a long time to physically restrain someone against their will (I did not bring up the “c” word, while vile is not illegal). It has also been unlawful to choke someone against their will. However, if there were appropriate safe words in place, that might be a defense on the later…

    As Nancy Pelosi would say: Palamino!

  6. Jason Lee
    June 25th, 2014 @ 8:18 pm

    You could eliminate all the unlawful choking and “blockading” of doors in the whole wide world and this girl would still be unhappy. Because somebody, somewhere would be “negotiating” for sex. (Please pass the smelling salts).

    The real problem here is that this girl is hopelessly attracted to “dark triad” boys. And she probably doesn’t have a good father figure to provide the firm hand of guidance that she desperately needs.

    A feminist is never allowed to admit she needs help from the patriarchy, but that’s what she’s unwittingly crying out for.

  7. Kirby McCain
    June 25th, 2014 @ 8:20 pm

    Schools and resorts always want to keep down the negative news. But that’s the clever thing about the whole #rapeculture thing and the crack down on sexual assault on our nation’s campuses. Doesn’t this in house, non judicial, process actually help the schools keep this nasty business quiet?

  8. Jason Lee
    June 25th, 2014 @ 8:32 pm

    You’ll pry their non judicial processes from their cold, dead hands. Who wants to give up all that power? The left is fighting over control of their kangaroo courts. Feminists want a bigger piece of the cake. If this fight drives more men away from college and poisons heterosexual relationships, that’s icing.

  9. NeoWayland
    June 25th, 2014 @ 8:32 pm


    No rules of evidence, no paper trail, no appeal.

    All it takes is one accusation.

  10. Pablo
    June 25th, 2014 @ 8:56 pm

    This might sound crazy but maybe if the girls would stop throwing the pussy around like water the boys would stop expecting to get it wet.

  11. Jason Lee
    June 25th, 2014 @ 9:18 pm

    I’m afraid that even Ivy League girls are too immature and inexperienced to understand any of this. But the adults who should be providing guidance and perspective are probably just as confused; disoriented from decades of feminist thinking. Does Stein’s law apply here?

  12. Mike G.
    June 25th, 2014 @ 10:00 pm

    I used to work at Agnes Scott Womens’ College in Decatur, GA. There were lots of stories about that school that never made the papers.

  13. Severian
    June 25th, 2014 @ 10:35 pm

    Yale…. isn’t that the college with the infamous “Sex Week,” where they bring in porn stars and such to teach undergrads about deviant acts? No correlation, I’m sure.

  14. Evi L. Bloggerlady
    June 25th, 2014 @ 11:04 pm

    Just talking about it is enough to make Mike Nifong and Amanda Corey’s nipples get hard!

  15. It can be done
    June 25th, 2014 @ 11:57 pm

    Lest one think that Yale is only filled with radical lesbian feminists (they were a loud group when I was a student there 20 years back but certainly a minority) I do wish to say that even with such politically and otherwise unpromising territory one can still succeed in the mating game. I met my wife at Yale and we have four churchgoing children and we both vote Republican (McDaniel Republican not Cochran). Even in the midst of PC madness, there is hope if you have strong values.

  16. Phil_McG
    June 26th, 2014 @ 7:49 am

    It’s a curious thing. The rarer rape becomes – US rape statistics are now at a 38-year low – the more feminists shriek about rape.

    It’s like global warming – no recorded global warming since 1997, so environmentalists just scream louder about climate change.

    So when feminists cry about “rape”, they’re probably not much inteterested in rape. This isn’t about protecting women, it’s about parading their radical credentials.

    And perhaps all the shrieking and unlikely “almost raped” stories help obscure what, for them, is an inconvenient truth: girls at elite American colleges are among the most privileged and pampered women who have ever lived on this planet.

  17. Dana
    June 26th, 2014 @ 8:17 am

    Our esteemed host may not know the details of Miss Brodsky’s rape claim, but I’d bet you one week of Wombat’s gruel rations that alcohol and/or recreational pharmaceuticals were involved.

  18. NeoWayland
    June 26th, 2014 @ 9:06 am

    You made me snort my tea…

    ???? That was too funny early in the morning!!

  19. Eli Whitney
    June 26th, 2014 @ 9:12 am

    Yanno, as a CT resident, one of my memories of New Haven is watching the freshmen women at Yale integrate in Yale culture.
    It’s easy to spot the freshmen women in the fall: they look like women.
    But by the summer, they have disappeared, and all you can see are generic slobs with few gender-identifying characteristics. They stop doing their hair, wearing makeup, and wearing feminine clothes. Hygiene is also a casualty, which I know firsthand from having ridden the bus next to these women many times.
    And their brains get rewired too. If you have the misfortune to talk to one of these paragons of feminism, you will hear a lot of blather about narratives and paradigms and postmodernism.
    Yale has a history of kowtowing to feminism and persecuting male students on little evidence. So it is amusing to see this broad trying to act like that hasn’t been the reality for 20 years.

  20. Nan
    June 26th, 2014 @ 10:58 am

    It does and then they’re not perceived as an unsafe place to be; they never seem to be criticized as they bring money in to the town.

  21. Nan
    June 26th, 2014 @ 11:00 am

    That’s a sucker bet.

  22. Dana
    June 26th, 2014 @ 12:16 pm

    Well, from what I understand, one week’s ration of gruel for His Wombatness isn’t that large an amount; our host is guarding his loyal minion against obesity. At any rate, even this sucker bet is one you could afford to lose.

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