The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

‘Jettison Society’s Toxic Values and Embrace the Beautiful You’

Posted on | January 14, 2015 | 38 Comments

See, that’s the way to fix your problem: Realize that there is nothing wrong with you. You are perfect, a Special Snowflake, a Rainbow Unicorn who is nothing but pure 100% perfection. Whatever you think might be wrong with you is perfectly OK. The only problem is that society — that is to say, everybody else in the world, whose “toxic values” blind them to the Rainbow Unicorn Special Snowflake beautiful perfection of you — is entirely wrong:

If you listen to most mainstream media, the new year is all about finding the new you. But what’s wrong with the old you?
We want to break away from the soul-crushing onslaught of negative New Year’s resolutions – eat less, lose weight, spend every waking moment at the gym – and promote feeling good about the skin you’re in.
While weight loss and fitness conglomerates would have you believe “healthy” looks like a size 6 or bulging biceps, good health doesn’t discriminate based on size or body shape. Wellness is about respecting and caring for the body you’re born with, not forcing it into an unrealistic cookie-cutter mould.
On many fronts, 2014 was a great year for the body-positive movement and diversity in general.
The rise of androgynous and genderless fashion represents society’s increasing acceptance of the LGBTQ community, as well as body types that don’t read as traditionally “masculine” or “feminine.”

See? It’s society’s problem for rejecting your unique beauty. The “mainstream media” trying to force you into an “unrealistic cookie-cutter mould,” even to the point of trying to make you have a “body type” that is traditionally “masculine” or “feminine”? Haters!

Stay strong, Special Snowflake — you’re beautiful just the way you are!



38 Responses to “‘Jettison Society’s Toxic Values and Embrace the Beautiful You’”

  1. M. Thompson
    January 14th, 2015 @ 10:37 pm

    I think I want to puke after seeing that cover.

  2. gothamette
    January 14th, 2015 @ 10:42 pm

    Try getting away with that fat acceptance stuff in Paris, or Milan.

  3. Zohydro
    January 14th, 2015 @ 10:50 pm

    Just as well… I don’ believe there are cookie-cutter moulds large enough for those two barges anyway! Still, I should be content if the trannies were to love the bodies they were born with…

  4. concern00
    January 14th, 2015 @ 11:35 pm

    “Wellness is about respecting and caring for the body you’re born with…”

    …and absolutely nobody is born with a body quite like that!

  5. John Rose
    January 15th, 2015 @ 12:49 am

    “Stay strong, Special Snowflake — you’re beautiful just the way you are!”


    No, you’re not.

  6. Kirby McCain
    January 15th, 2015 @ 1:09 am

    Cake pan, I’m thinking cake pan.

  7. Kirby McCain
    January 15th, 2015 @ 1:12 am

    Bundt cake.

  8. RKae
    January 15th, 2015 @ 1:22 am

    It never seems to hit home with these idiots that they’re constantly shouting about society trying to force a notion of normal on us all… while they themselves are trying to grab the steering wheel of society so that THEY can tell us what “normal” is.

  9. RKae
    January 15th, 2015 @ 1:25 am

    “Respecting the body you’re born with…” unless the body you’re born with is male and you’re delusional enough to believe that you’re female.

    In which case, you need a surgeon to chop up your body and make it into an imitation female.

    And, of course, we need to force everyone else to go along with your fantasy.

  10. Jim R
    January 15th, 2015 @ 1:44 am

    There is something in the message. As a (ahem) gravitationally-challenged American, I know that losing weight would do me some good. I also know that we (and especially women) are constantly hectored to look a certain way. Think of the images we see in the checkout aisle alone: we men are supposed to have bulging biceps and six-pack abs, while the ladies are supposed to be size 0 with D cups. It’s insane, and pretty hard on some people, especially young girls.

    There’s a line between being hapy with who you are on the one side and being a special snowflake on the other. Being happy but always trying to improve, it seems to me, is the best thing.

  11. concern00
    January 15th, 2015 @ 2:37 am

    Congratulations. You have just identified another logical inconsistency in leftist dogma.

  12. Adjoran
    January 15th, 2015 @ 4:30 am

    About 15 years ago, the periodic international testing of childhood education across industrialized countries found that at age 8, American students were at or near the top in the STEM and language arts, but by age 13, they had declined to around 15th among the measured nations. But they had progressed to clear first in “self esteem.”

    The old fashioned way of gaining self esteem was to earn it. Now they teach you it is your right, you don’t need to do anything positive at all.

    Hard to blame this on parents, since presumably they had the same parents five years later.

  13. Rick McGinnis
    January 15th, 2015 @ 6:03 am

    I worked for NOW magazine for 12 years, Robert. You have NO idea. Some nice people there, but at the top – a Trotskyite madhouse.

  14. RS
    January 15th, 2015 @ 7:36 am

    There’s nothing inherently wrong with being content with who you are. That is, with the person God made you to be. The problem with is that the reaction to societal ideals about body image is more about creating a new class of victims than actual contentment. They seek to trade their disaffection with their appearance for disaffection with society and thereby assume the mantle of the oppressed in order to obtain all the perks and privilege that status entails.

  15. Phil_McG
    January 15th, 2015 @ 7:47 am

    That cover should come with a health warning. Note the use of the word “brave”. Morbidly obese people are “brave” for continuing to stuff food in their maws. Right.


    Now, I’ve been to Toronto. And I’m wondering: why is a Chinese city obsessed with race?

  16. Evi L. Bloggerlady
    January 15th, 2015 @ 9:07 am
  17. Evi L. Bloggerlady
    January 15th, 2015 @ 9:08 am

    Bingo. Which is why you should home school your kids or alternatively find a good private school.

  18. Dana
    January 15th, 2015 @ 9:24 am

    I’m somewhat surprised by the article, given your previously expressed support for Melissa Seidemann, the very much not-skinny player for the US Olympic Water Polo team, and condemnation of ESPN’s “body issue” for excluding her from the glamour photos of the team.

    Yeah, obese is not exactly my biggest turn-on when it comes to women — pun most definitely intended — but some people are simply going to be overweight, and they might as well try their best to be as happy as they can about it.

    The water polo team, sans Miss Seidermann:

  19. Bumr50
    January 15th, 2015 @ 10:24 am

    There’s a HUGE difference between being comfortable with who you are and blaming everyone else (“society”) for your insecurity, IMHO.

    The Left is trying to vanquish the ENTIRE concept of shame in an attempt to garner more “victims.”

    This is dangerous.

  20. Bob Belvedere
    January 15th, 2015 @ 11:18 am

    Any Society that sees being oppressed as a badge of honor is a Society that is in the Decline Stage.

    When being a Victim is considered being a Hero by the majority in a Society, said Society has degenerated into a mental illness.

  21. Fail Burton
    January 15th, 2015 @ 11:21 am

    I find it amusing that all these PC supremacist movements can’t actually display any supremacy, and that is the key to their rhetoric: it isn’t themselves that are broken but whatever finished in first place.

    That brings us to the newest catch-all umbrella ideology for every last place nag that ever ran at Pimlico: Intersectional gender feminism.

    Whether it’s being slender, able-bodied, or successful in the least way, it is smugly written off as a Jim Crow-like “normative” oppression. Black culture has no problems even though it is the only thing affected, rather it is the failings of whites. The Third World are unlucky rocket scientists prevented from landing rovers on Mars only by lucky Laurel and Hardy colonialists. Women haven’t formed tank divisions because of patriarchy. Radical psychotic gay feminists aren’t really an ecological cul-de-sac, I and my baby-making magic is. Islam isn’t broken, it is the failure of the clever clockwork-making West that suffers from spiritual emptiness. In upside-down-land, what is broken is not and what is not, is. Fat models one could sentence to death by ordering them to play a softball doubleheader just need me to start wearing societal beer-goggles and like a funhouse mirror they’ll be scrambling up volcanoes and running the 40 yard dash in no time. If I put Chevrolet fins on a pig it’ll excede Mach 5, especially if I adjust the speedometer so that 1 mile an hour reads as Mach 5.

    I have no Chevrolet fins or Orwellian speedometers for fat PoC gay gender feminists from Syria devoted to Islam. China and Russia have no great trend of PoC gender studies so they are unlikely to fight with one hand tied behind their back and more than likely to rip off one’s Chevrolet fins. Life isn’t Halloween.

  22. DeadMessenger
    January 15th, 2015 @ 11:30 am

    This picture explains everything…

  23. Finrod Felagund
    January 15th, 2015 @ 11:46 am

    Enh, I’m fairly androgynous-looking myself, the difference is that I don’t need anyone to pump up my self-esteem.

  24. Sort-of-Mad Max
    January 15th, 2015 @ 12:15 pm

    Next week’s headline: “The Oppressors Within; Or How You Can Get Your Blood Pressure And Lipids Count To Stop Fat-Shaming You!”

  25. RKae
    January 15th, 2015 @ 12:19 pm

    I’ll accept the award from you, but I won’t pretend that finding inconsistencies in leftist dogma is any sort of toil.

  26. Jerry Beckett
    January 15th, 2015 @ 12:36 pm

    I would love to hear your story of how you a) came to work for NOW magazine and b) what made you leave (escape from?) NOW magazine. Sounds like you’ve seen the abyss and lived to tell about it…

  27. daialanye
    January 15th, 2015 @ 12:41 pm

    Two rules even thin folk should consider:
    1. Use clothing to cover unsightly body parts.(And stay warm.)
    2. Do not draw attention to unsightly parts by application of tattoos or piercings.

  28. ‘Jettison Society’s Toxic Values and Embrace the Beautiful You’ |
    January 15th, 2015 @ 12:46 pm

    […] RSM—See, that’s the way to fix your problem: Realize that there is nothing wrong with you. You are perfect, a Special Snowflake, a Rainbow Unicorn who is nothing but pure 100% perfection. Whatever you think might be wrong with you is perfectly OK. The only problem is that society — that is to say, everybody else in the world, whose “toxic values” blind them to the Rainbow Unicorn Special Snowflake beautiful perfection of you — is entirely wrong:  MORE  […]

  29. Dana
    January 15th, 2015 @ 1:02 pm

    Do not draw attention to even the sightly parts by application of tattoos or piercings.

    There are two very cute sisters who work at the local diner. The older one (about 25) treats patrons to a fairly nice display of her feminine charms — both of them — but the younger sister, alas! had her chest all tatted up, and has to wear a high necked shirt to keep her job. She has just as nice a body as her older sister (slightly better, actually) but she has to hide one of her most sightly parts.

    I did point out to my daughters as they were growing up that when someone gets tired of a piercing, he can just remove it, but tats are forever. Fortunately, at ages 26 and 23, neither of them has either one. Maybe I didn’t do too bad a job as a father.

  30. Daniel Freeman
    January 15th, 2015 @ 1:40 pm

    Well. Maybe not the same dad.

  31. Daniel Freeman
    January 15th, 2015 @ 1:58 pm

    It is possible to mock both the haters and the victimhood pimps, without contradiction. Don’t leave the chunky girl out of the team photo, and don’t censor Facebook memes that make fun of her.

  32. Daniel Freeman
    January 15th, 2015 @ 2:14 pm

    Two words: Harrison Bergeron.

  33. K-Bob
    January 15th, 2015 @ 2:52 pm

    When it’s my turn to be supreme being, I’m damn well gonna make sure all snowflakes look exactly the same.

    Also, that all receipts clearly show the relevant date in the upper right hand corner.

    As for all the rest, you’re on your own.

    (This is now part of K-Bob’s Codex.)

  34. K-Bob
    January 15th, 2015 @ 3:20 pm

    I showed my kids what old sailor’s tattoos looked like when they’d been on their skin for forty years. I also pointed out that piercings are targets in bar and street fighting, and you can’t run when your pants are down below your waist.

    I would tell them it was my goal to make it into the box the same way I came into the world.

    That didn’t prevent all ink, but it made sure they didn’t do any of that stuff till age 24,

  35. daialanye
    January 15th, 2015 @ 3:24 pm

    Agreed. Even in the Marine Corps, way back when, excessive tattoos were laughed at.

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