Objectified by the Male Gaze
UPDATE: Allegedly Heterosexual?

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By now, the entire Internet knows Charlotte Proudman (@CRProudman) hates heterosexual men:

I find your message offensive. I am on [LinkedIn] for business purposes not to be approached about my physical appearance or to be objectified by sexist men. The eroticisation of women’s physical appearance is a way of exercising power over women. It silences women’s professional attributes as their physical appearance becomes the subject.
Unacceptable and misogynistic behaviour. Think twice before sending another woman (half your age) such a sexist message.

Such was Ms. Proudman’s now-notorious reply to the unfortunate Alexander Carter-Silk, 57, who had made the mistake of telling the 27-year-old radical feminist lawyer that her LinkedIn profile photo was “stunning.” Before analyzing Ms. Proudman’s discourse about “exercising power over women,” let’s clear up the obvious question: Did the married middle-aged Mr. Carter-Silk intend his message as more than casual flattery? Was he hoping to get busy with her?

Ace of Spades concludes that he was, but that his compliment was “a pretty soft gesture of interest.” Alternative hypothesis: Mr. Carter-Silk is simply not used to encountering “stunning” young women in his queue of LinkedIn communications and, without really intending to “hit on” Ms. Proudman, found himself unable to resist the temptation to comment on her looks. This is admittedly a devil’s advocate defense, the most feasible explanation of Mr. Carter-Silk’s message as an innocent blunder — a careless lapse of decorum. It is bad manners and always in poor taste for a man to comment on the appearance of a woman with whom he is not properly acquainted. Such forward behavior is, of course, all too common in a society that has almost entirely abandoned traditional customs of courtesy, but who am I to complain of that? It’s not as if I’m a consistent model of polite behavior myself, and therefore it would be hypocritical for me to criticize Mr. Carter-Silk merely for being rude.

On the other hand, maybe Mr. Carter-Silk is a lecherous old goat who was guilty as charged, using LinkedIn as a means of pursuing adulterous liaisons, so that his praise for Ms. Proudman’s profile photo was an attempt to “score.” In that case, for reasons I’ve explained elsewhere (“Don’t Do This, Ever”), Mr. Carter-Silk is a damned fool. Using digital communication (texts, emails, social media) to pursue sexual relationships is always a mistake. Whatever the specific medium — including online dating apps (“Hit It or Quit It on Tinder”) — the participant in online romantic pursuit is creating a record of digital evidence that can have devastating consequences. The recipient of your email or other digital communication could forward it to others or, as Mr. Carter-Silk learned to his eternal regret, your private message can be published for the whole world to see. Therefore, as I have lectured my teenagers, don’t do this, ever. Never say anything in a private digital communication that you would not want to see on the front page of the New York Times. The downside risk is enormous, and people have actually committed suicide after their online misbehavior was revealed.

Well, then, what about Ms. Proudman’s feminist lecture about the “eroticisation of women’s physical appearance”? Is it really true, as she insists, that complimenting a woman on her appearance “is a way of exercising power over women,” so that all such compliments are inherently “offensive,” “sexist” and “misogynistic”? Daily Mail columnist Sarah Vine mocked that idea as absurd:

If that is what counts as ‘objectification’ and ‘misogyny’ these days, then the human race is in deep trouble. Not only does it beggar belief that Ms Proudman could have inferred any slight from such an innocuous missive, it also makes me fear for the next generation of women.
After all, heaven help the poor man who actually tries to ask her out on a date, let alone try to get her into his bed. He’d have better luck propositioning a porcupine.

This hits the nail on the head, and Sarah Vine further assert that “most normal women . . . would be delighted” to have a man praise their online profile photos, as “compliments are few and far between these days,” which is to say:

  1. Radical feminists are not “normal women”;
    and
  2. Many women don’t know how to deal with compliments because men “these days” are afraid to compliment women, as men may be accused of sexual harassment for doing so.

Feminists have deliberately created a climate of fear in schools, universities and workplaces, where any male who dares so much as speak to a woman is at risk of devastating accusations that he has “harassed” her. Even if he has done nothing that could plausibly be viewed as “hitting on” her, the male who says or does anything that a woman finds “unwelcome” or “offensive” could be charged with fostering discriminatory conditions. This involves what is known as the “hostile environment” theory of sexual harassment, which views any expression of male heterosexuality as a potential source of discrimination against women. Daphne Patai astutely examined this phenomenon in her 1998 book Heterophobia: Sexual Harassment and the Future of Feminism, which I highly recommend. A former Women’s Studies professor (co-author of Professing Feminism, which I also recommend), Dr. Patai called attention to how feminist discourse about “harassment” expressed a hostility toward normal male behavior, based in radical theories that interpret heterosexuality per se as oppressive to women.

This anti-male attitude — “Fear and Loathing of the Penis” — is pervasive within the academic institutions of the Feminist-Industrial Complex. In American universities, Women’s Studies programs and other forms of feminist advocacy are protected from critical scrutiny by Title X legislation, which has been interpreted in such a way that criticizing feminism can itself be considered evidence of discriminatory intent. Women’s Studies professors and other feminist activists on university campuses are effectively exempt from opposition or criticism, and thus are free to promote outright hatred of males without anyone being able to condemn them for it. The 21st-century campus is overtly hostile to males, a hostility evident in the fact that males are now a minority (43%) of college students. Universities now punish males on the basis of mere suspicion of “sexual misconduct,” defined so broadly as to include every possible expression of male heterosexuality. Ordinary flirtation is rapidly becoming a lost art because it is strongly discouraged, if not altogether prohibited, by these policies.

It is perfectly understandable that a young law school graduate like Charlotte Proudman finds it “offensive” to be complimented on her looks. All such compliments are streng verboten in modern academia. No college-educated young man would dare tell a woman she is “stunning” for fear of the kind of vindictive retaliation Ms. Proudman displayed. When feminists talk about “empowering” women, this is exactly the kind of power they have in mind — the power of women to inflict savage humiliation on men.

Because feminism is inspired by sadistic revenge fantasies, Ms. Proudman’s public scolding of Mr. Carter-Silk was greeted with enthusiastic applause by young feminists, who dream of the opportunity to crush and embarrass men in such a manner. Any young man who attempts to flirt with a woman now risks the destruction of his reputation and career, and depriving men of professional employment opportunities is what feminist “empowerment” is ultimately about.

Milo Yiannopoulos suggests Ms. Proudman would have been flattered by a compliment from a young good-looking man:

On a related note, I suspect that if the male lawyer looked like George Clooney, Ms. Proudman wouldn’t be complaining. But you’re not supposed to say that, are you.

Unfortunately, this suggestion presumes Charlotte Proudman is heterosexual, a presumption for which we have no evidence at all. In fact — if you will re-read what Ms. Proudman wrote — her denunciation of “sexist men . . . exercising power over women” does not even permit us to imagine the possibility that any expression of male admiration would be acceptable to her. We may interpret Ms. Proudman’s discourse as saying that all men who are attracted to women are misogynists, because male heterosexuality requires the “eroticisation of women’s physical appearance,” which is “offensive” to her. Ms. Proudman expanded on this hostile theme in a subsequent Twitter harangue:

“Widespread, casual, demeaning behaviour directed towards women is a form of social policing, gender control & a hidden form of social violence.”

To call a woman “stunning” is, according to Ms. Proudman, “demeaning behavior,” “gender control” and “social violence.” Does this strike you as something a heterosexual woman would say?

It is one thing to say a man’s unsolicited compliment to a woman is inappropriate, but accusing him of “social violence”? This kind of rhetorical overkill is an expression of radical feminism, which condemns heterosexual intercourse as “the pure, sterile, formal expression of men’s contempt for women” (Andrea Dworkin), claiming “women have to be coerced into heterosexuality” (Marilyn Frye), because men “control women through heterosexuality” (Joyce Trebilcot) in order to “encourage women’s subservience” (Susan Shaw and Janet Lee).

Hatred of males defines feminism to such an extent that it could be considered an insult to accuse a feminist of heterosexuality. A woman who calls herself a feminist is more likely to agree with Julie Bindel that all men should be put in “some kind of camp.” Certainly, no one should be surprised that Charlotte Proudman celebrated International Women’s Day in March by posting a photo with the caption: “Fantastic evening with so many amazing women speaking about radical feminism.”

In case anyone was under the mistaken impression that feminism simply means equality, Charlotte Proudman wrote a entire column in February explaining why you’re wrong:

I am a feminist and I do not strive for equality. I support liberation. . . . Equality takes the male status quo as the standard to which women aspire. . . .
It is impossible to alter male spheres, which are resistant to outside interference, because women are a minority that could be cut out at anytime, and men have vested interests in preserving the status quo.
The Equality Act 2010 . . . was designed to give the false impression that women’s subjugation had been legally acknowledged. . . .
The equalist debate is one way of preserving patriarchy, whereas feminism seeks to give power to women on their own terms — not mens. This is why I am a feminist, not an equalist. . . .
Men hold the balance of power. Power is granted in the wrong ways, and used for the wrong ends. Change can come about by redefining and redistributing power, breaking down hierarchal structures, and reevaluating the criteria designed by men.

You see? Equality is bad, because it “takes the male status quo as the standard” and equality does not “give power to women on their own terms.” Feminism is about “redefining and redistributing power” and ending “women’s subjugation.” If you think feminists give a damn what men think about anything, you have made a stunning mistake.

UPDATE: Ms. Proudman has been quoted thus:

“My partner gets messages asking if he wants a job at hedge funds, I get propositions from men asking me out. I want a public apology.”

Somehow I overlooked that quote earlier — Ms. Proudman using the male pronoun to refer to her “partner” — which is evidence that she might actually be heterosexual. If true, this would raise the questions, “Why?” and “How?”

That is to say, if Ms. Proudman is filled with such generalized rage toward “women’s subjugation” within the “male status quo,” why would she be fraternizing with the enemy? And how would such a bundle of fiery anti-male anger attract a boyfriend, or reconcile her politics with the enactment of her, uh, “subjugation”? Stipulate that, during my depraved youth — I was a Democrat then, remember — some of my girlfriends must have been feminists, e.g., the Cranston delegate. Thankfully, however, we didn’t have the Internet in 1984, so women didn’t have a global platform to spew their beliefs to the world, and therefore if there were any contradictions between a woman’s personal preferences and her political theory, nobody knew it.

Hypothetically, a guy might be dating the kind of liberal woman who was on the Democrat primary ballot as a delegate for the Alan Cranston 1984 presidential campaign, and if she also liked to do it doggy style — well, who knew?

Yet we are not here to indulge in hypothetical speculation, and as a respectable conservative Republican, I condemn the very idea of young Democrats engaging in carnal knowledge. My point is that the Internet has narrowed the gap between the personal and the political, which makes me wonder how any young man could keep from laughing out loud while he’s hooking up with a feminist like Charlotte Proudman.

I’d bet £10 she likes it doggy style, too.




 

114 comments

  2. Question: What’s the difference between Charlotte Proudman and an Islamic terrorist?

    Answer: You can negotiate with the terrorist.

  4. Agreed, and another British lawyer on the media rolodex said she’d likely blacklisted herself, both because she made public a private communication and because of her general boorishness.

    I think Mr. Carter-Silk’s specialty (patents, trademarks, and copyright) is sufficiently distant from her’s (which appears to be some mix of subpecialties) that he would not have been sending many cases. However, other lawyers who might have would be warned off.

    Interestingly, she’s on leave right now working on a doctorate at Cambridge.

  5. She’s a ‘barrister’ not a ‘solicitor’, so she does not have any ‘partner’s’ per se. She belongs to a ‘chambers’. The head of her chambers is apparently a fat old red. I suppose it would be uncharitable to figger he banged ’em like William Kuntsler back in the day (or would have liked to if he hadn’t be ugly).

  6. I’m as laid back as can be. The main thing is…don’t get excited.

    By the by, where in Florida are y’all? I’m in the Tampa area for a while. 🙂

  7. a whole lot of ‘feminists’ are really Marxist Revolutionaries FIRST
    and anything else second. See the writings from the Weather Underground. They disapprove of getting pregnant or taking care of children because it reduces their effectiveness as ‘true revolutionaries’ – kinda hard to do street fighting when you are pregnant.
    And other feminists buy into what the ‘true revolutionaries’ say.

  8. Indeed. Whether she got that name from her father or from a patriarchically inclined cismale spouse, she seems to have no qualms about carrying around a name that celebrates patriarchy overtly as well as by implication.

  9. That’s Miss Proudman — though I’m uncertain why it hasn’t been changed to Proudperson or Proudwoman — and not the repulsive Ms Proudman; Ms is an “honorific” which is disgusting, repulsive and an offense to the Lord.

    Of course, I note that Miss Proudman no only wore makeup for her Linkedin photo, but has tweeted photos of herself in quite feminine attire, proudly displaying her feminine charms . . . both of them. 🙂

  12. Proudman? Really? Irony is so ironic.
    Also, she is a big, fat liar. If she didn’t want male attention she wouldn’t go out of her way trying to make herself so “stunning”. Even so, I don’t think she’s all that cute. What’s with that ridiculous wig?

  13. …I know of a dozen of normal women that would be happy to receive the type of attention this hater got. Is she a Lesbian or just insane or both!

  16. I’m stunned by her touchy over the top reaction. Not by her looks, which are oh so ordinary. Is that sexist?

  18. Nope. When a male understands that feminism hates him and works tirelessly to destroy him…..there isn’t a social contract anymore. You see, men can’t rely on women any longer. So, let feminists get killed by whoever wants to kill them. The quickest way for ISIS to get higher approval among white men……behead some of our trash.

  21. As a barrister, Charlotte Proudman may want to take a look at the LinkedIn User Agreement and count up all the ways she violated it.

  23. Whenever I’m a the grocery and am done putting my stuff in my truck I always make a point of taking one woman’s empty cart from her on my way to the cart rack- just my one good deed a day thing.
    The more I read here the more I wonder if some of them might think that I’m belittling them or “hoping to score” by being civilized.
    Craziness. (them not me)

  24. “Stupid knot-headed rednecks are a constant reminder of why I spent most of my adult life being a criminal” – A. Criminal

  25. I agree. I’ve constantly seen remarks from SJWs about why we seem to only go after that story. The truth is it’s the perfect SJW epitome of stupid.

  27. Fortunately, for Mz. Proudman (wouldn’t a true feminist change her name from “Proudman”), Ron White could not be reached for comment….

  28. I often see who around me might need help. Often, there is a mother with small children or an elderly person struggling with unloading the cart. I never quite know what to expect when I offer to help….

    But, I offer anyway because I try to be a gentleman.

  29. “ALLEGEDLY HETEROSEXUAL”
    Maybe that should really be “Begrudgingly Heterosexual”

    I pity the poor milk toast that was chosen to be her “partner.”

  34. Ah, but you see, Ms. Proudman now has a foolproof strategy.

    If any solicitors refuse to hire or pay her, she’ll just accuse them of “backlash” or “retaliation” for her internet rant and sue them.

    It’s a standard leftist/feminist method. Litigate your way into business success!

  36. ” It is bad manners and always in poor taste for a man to comment on the appearance of a woman with whom he is not properly acquainted. Such forward behavior is, of course, all too common in a society that has almost entirely abandoned traditional customs of courtesy…”
    –RSM

    This, is in fact, the real issue. Because we have lost our bearings in morals and manners, all behaviors are allowable, though not necessarily welcome.

    As a result, the language of politics and “civil rights” becomes a substitute for the world of politeness and formality that the baby boomers, in their overwhelming and ceaseless stupidity, threw away.

    The situation of campus “rape” is much the same thing.

    Real rape is a horrific, devastating crime that leaves its victim traumatized. (I’ve had several friends who have been raped: their lives were permanently changed by it, even with years of therapy.)

    Campus “rape” is largely a matter of manners and mores: Even if a drunk girl says she wants sex, it is not gentlemanly to take advantage of the situation. A gentleman makes sure the young woman gets home safely and has a female companion watching over her. Society used to reward a gentleman who acted in such a manner with a good reputation and priority in relationships.

    But when you take away manner and morals, there is nothing to guide a young man’s behavior and no rewards for doing the “right” thing. Into the void left by the rejection of self restraint jumps the government, the activist groups, and the wholesale politicization of relations between people. Every personal interaction must be policed so that there is, in fact, a downside to bedding down every drunken girl who asks for it.

    Feminists like Ms. Proudman bear much of the blame for destroying the system of politeness and manners, which, itself, rose out of a system of personal and societal ethics and morals. This system allowed the freest people on earth to interact with a minimum of government interference.

    When second wave feminists yelled at men who opened doors for them, they obliterated a code of respect that had taken centuries to perfect. Proudman and her ilk have driven us headlong into the new barbarity which will eventually require a permanent government babysitter.

  37. I believe that Miss Proudman is suffering from a common ailment among young women, which I call “Romulan Cloaking Device Dysphoria.” This particular delusion, often seen in women wearing bikinis, booty shorts, yoga pants or other revealing attire, convinces the sufferer that she is invisible to any man who is too young, too old, too fat or insufficiently prosperous. She can only be seen by fit, wealthy, attractive men of the proper age. The cloaking device, however, can be defeated only by that most dreadful superweapon, The Male Gaze…

  42. That is to say, if Ms. Proudman is filled with such generalized rage toward “women’s subjugation” within the “male status quo,” why would she be fraternizing with the enemy? And how would such a bundle of fiery anti-male anger attract a boyfriend, or reconcile her politics with the enactment of her, uh, “subjugation”?

    People are often very good at compartmentalising their beliefs. So someone can believe that Group X is full of evil rotters, whilst also believing that every actual member of Group X they know is quite nice really, without ever really confronting the dissonance between these two positions. It’s the same sort of dynamic you get when an outspoken racist has black friends.

  43. Palm Bay, the event horizon of the abyss of Revelation.

    Spent a bit of my childhood on a big property in Lutz though, out in your neck of the woods. I recall picnicing in Lowry Park back when it was nice. And I remember Busch Gardens back when it was a brewery tour and some flower gardens, and a couple of trained parrots. : )

  44. The social pact between men and women has been broken. Real men don’t need to protect feminists. They can fight or die by themselves.

  46. I ain’t from here…just working here. In November, we will be working Palm Bay area when we do our Christmas tree gig. Palm Bay is my daughter’s territory.

  49. That’s right.
    Caution: when I do these types of things I always announce myself from a distance, rather than just walking up on them.
    Since it’s a bit out of the ordinary these days, I don’t want to startle them or get shot while try to be a nice guy.

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