The U.S. Crumbles, While President ‘I’ Candy Couches It On ‘The View’

Posted on September 30, 2012September 30, 2012Comments

by Smitty

UPDATE: CNSNews dropped the page, for whatever reason. I updated my URL to point to Google, and my source article is the second link.

UPDATE II: Aha, a ruse! Thanks to Thane Eichenauer in the comments.

CNSNews reports the Lakota Sioux, led by Russell Means, have called it quits for the second time.

“We are no longer citizens of the United States of America and all those who live in the five-state area that encompasses our country are free to join us,” long-time Native American radical leader Russell Means said. The move potentially impacts the states of Nebraska, South Dakota, North Dakota, Montana and Wyoming.

Insults Too Grievous to Be Borne Gladly

Posted on May 2, 2012May 2, 2012Comments

The dark mood is on me again, and I keep stumbling across occasions to remember injuries and insults heaped up like a gigantic mountain of humiliation. An inferno of rage burns in my gut, and restraining it takes a constant, conscious effort that exhausts me.

Serial betrayals by backstabbing two-faced “friends” — well, I must put it out of my mind, if possible.

Today, I’ve got business offline that will keep me away from the blog most of the day, and I’ll try to cool my temper. Eventually, some liberal will say or do something stupid, and will regret it: Looks like you done pissed off the wrong redneck today, buster.

Meanwhile, remember me in your prayers.

UPDATE: So now I’m blogging from a coffee shop in downtown D.C. — got a few meetings today — and what’s the first thing I see when I log on?

Troglopundit wants some of this pent-up rage. Listen here, you overgrown Pleistocene throwback: It’s not my fault the diminutive hipster douchebag Sean Hackbarth moved to D.C. and thereby deprived you of your status as the Second Ugliest Blogger in Wisconsin. Stop blaming me for everything, OK? Blame Telford!

UPDATE II: Helpful advice from Bill Quick:

Well, try not to strangle anybody in the business deal. That’s usually a deal breaker.

Thanks, Bill. Such a reaction would probably be frowned on by the guys with wires in their ears. Kind of an important meeting. IYKWIMAITYD.

A Venn Diagram Might Be Helpful

Posted on October 19, 2011October 19, 2011Comments

LAS VEGAS, Nevada
Last night at the CNN debate, somebody said, “Hey, have you seen Erik Telford?”

“No, is he here?”

“Yeah. He was on Twitter asking who was coming to Vegas for the Western Republican Leadership Conference.”

Well, I’d been busy covering the debate and hadn’t seen the Twitter message, and by the time I hit my deadline for The American Spectator, the fact that Telford was in town had slipped my mind.

Fast-forward to this morning. I had to go down to the drugstore to buy a razor, and was walking through the lobby of the hotel when a familiar figure walked past me. So I reached out and slugged Telford in the arm.

“Dude, why didn’t you call me?”

“I didn’t know you were in town — until you slugged me in the arm.”

“It wasn’t exactly a secret that I was coming to Vegas,” I said. “But I guess nobody reads my blog.”

“Well,” Telford said. “I figured you wouldn’t get invited.”

“Yeah, I invited myself. Because nobody ever invites me anywhere. Like BlogCon — can you believe Tabitha Hale left me off the list?”

Telford laughed. Because, of course, I’m always left off the list, unlike Stephen Kruiser, Katie Harbath, Cord Blomquist, Peter List, Frank Keegan, Dana Loesch, Larry O’Connor, John Nolte, Meredith Dake, Matthias Shapiro, Will Franklin, Brandon Stewart, Bill Beutler, Michael Sandoval, Ari Armstrong, Todd Shepherd, T.L. James, Kelly Maher, Andrew Malcom, Melissa Clouthier, Michelle Malkin, Steven Crowder, Jim Pethokoukis, Dean Clancy, Max Pappas, Ed Morrissey, Deneen Borelli, Ace of Spades, Kristina Ribali, Russ Walker . . .

Just like Telford didn’t call me when he got to Vegas — because nobody wants to hang out with me, right? — Tabitha didn’t invite me to BlogCon because she wants it to be a fun, exciting event featuring people who are actually important, influential and popular.

In an effort to understand this situation, I mentally envisioned Tabitha’s worldview as a Venn Diagram:

There is no “Set AB,” because these are non-intersecting sets.

Ergo, the very fact that you’re reading my blog means that you are not important and don’t really matter.

UPDATE: Tabitha accuses me of harassment? A historic first: Harassment with Venn Diagrams.

Meanwhile, this might be a good time to remind you that I’ll be speaking Oct. 29 at the Maryland Conservative Action Network’s “Turning the Tides” conference in Annapolis.

What Tabitha Hale Said

Posted on September 9, 2010September 9, 2010Comments

I had called the Interactive Media Coordinator for FreedomWorks to explain why I wouldn’t be able to attend BlogCon — Where All the Important Bloggers Will Be — and, although I wasn’t taking notes, the conversation went something like this:

TABITHA: Hi, Stacy! I’m sitting here having lunch with some friends of yours. We’re laughing behind your back.
ME: Of course you are.
TABITHA: Because you’re not here. Hahaha!
ME: Yeah, I kinda wanted to talk about that.
TABITHA: OK, talk to me, loser.
ME: Well, I’m looking at the Blog Con schedule here, and I see you’ve got Stephen Kruiser hosting your opening session . . .
TABITHA: Yeah, Stephen is so much fun! Everybody likes him.
ME: Uh, yeah. And then your speakers there Saturday morning are Mary Katharine Ham, Melissa Clouthier, John Hawkins and Jim Hoft . . .
TABITHA: Isn’t that a great lineup? All the really good bloggers, the ones who have talent and stuff like that.
ME: Right. And then there is this panel on how to use Twitter, with Melissa Clouthier and Stephen Kruiser . . .
TABITHA: Because they’re the best!
ME: No argument there, I guess. So you’ve got this 10:45 a.m. panel tomorrow on “Investigative Blogging” with Will Lutz and Philip Klein . . .
TABITHA: Isn’t that awesome? I mean, wow, Phil writes for The American Spectator. He’s like an actual reporter, y’know. That was a big coup for us, to be able to get a real honest-to-goodness professional journalist for Blog Con, to tell people how to do that kind of important reporting stuff that Phil knows how to do.
ME: Obviously. And then you have that 2:45 p.m. “Humor in Blogging” panel.
TABITHA: Exactly! I mean, Ace of Spades, Caleb Howe, Lori Ziganto and IowaHawk, right? Those guys are hilarious! They just totally crack me up. ROTLMAO, IYKWIMAITYD.
ME: Uh . . . of course. Who am I to disagree? But, I mean, wasn’t there anything you felt like I might be able to talk about?
TABITHA: You?
ME: Yeah. Couldn’t you have found some excuse to put me on one of your panels?
TABITHA: You’re kidding me, right? Stacy, don’t you understand that this is a conference for important bloggers? We had to have panelists who were qualified — you know, good bloggers who actually do stuff that matters.
ME: But . . . I thought we were friends.

And then, without warning, she hung up. Well, Steve Eggleston and Da Tech Guy are at Blog Con, so I guess they’ll be blogging about all the awesome fun that everybody’s having, laughing at me behind my back . . .

Where All the Important Bloggers Will Be

Posted on September 9, 2010September 9, 2010Comments

FreedomWorks made sure that only the very best bloggers were invited to speak at this weekend’s conference:

Erick Erickson, Matt Kibbe, Steven Crowder, Stephen Kruiser, Mary Katharine Ham, Melissa Clouthier, John Hawkins, Jim Hoft, Bill Whittle, Steve Green, Scott Ott, Matt Lewis, Caleb Brown, Will Lutz, Philip Klein, Lee Doren, Jason Mattera, Cord Blomquist, Max Pappas, Ace of Spades, Caleb Howe, Lori Ziganto and IowaHawk.

You wouldn’t want to miss that, would you?

As much as I’d like to absorb valuable knowledge from professionals who actually know how to do good blogging — to study at the feet of the masters, as it were — there is the problem of transportation. (I’m pretty sure it was Erik Telford who sent that deer to attack my car.)

Mrs. Other McCain says I’d have to rent a car for the weekend and I certainly don’t know enough about blogging to figure out how to pay for a rental car, do I?

Event To Build Character Scheduled On Ann. Of Famous Speech On Character Denounced By Those Lacking Character

Posted on August 18, 2010August 18, 2010Comments

by Smitty

This blog is looking forward to having a fine, American, a-political time at Glen Beck’s 8/28 event.

From the 8/28 page:

What can I bring?
You can bring small umbrellas, bottled water (plastic bottles only please), bag lunches, snacks (e.g. Stacy’s vanilla pudding), lawn chairs, cameras, blankets, small coolers, backpacks, and flags. Also, we advise that you bring hats (say, a fedora) and sunscreen.

What can I NOT bring?
As a security precaution, the following items will be prohibited from the event sites:

NO signs (political or otherwise) as they may deter from the peaceful message we are bringing to Washington.
Firearms (either real or simulated)
Ammunition
Explosives of any kind (including fireworks, to the chagrin of Stacy McCain)
Knives, blades, or sharp objects (of any length)
Mace and/or pepper spray
Helium balloons
Sticks or poles
Pocket or hand tools, such as “leatherman”
Packages
Large bags (anything larger than a backpack)
Duffle bags
Suitcases
Weapons of any kind
Aerosols
Laser pointers
Animals other than service/guide dogs
Structures (i.e tents)
Alcoholic beverages
Other items that may pose a threat to the security of the event

Who are the speakers?
The speakers include representatives from SOWF, Glenn Beck, Sarah Palin, Dr. Alveda King and Marcus Luttrell. Jo Dee Messina will be performing as well.

Character vs. ‘characters’

Beck was quoted in the comPost as saying:

. . .whites don’t own the Founding Fathers. Whites don’t own Abraham Lincoln. Blacks don’t own Martin Luther King. Humans, humans embrace their ideas or reject their ideas. Too many are rejecting the Founders’ ideas. Too many have forgotten Abraham Lincoln’s ideas and far too many have either gotten just lazy or they have purposely distorted Martin Luther King’s ideas of judge a man by the content of his character. Lately, in the last 20 years, we’ve been told that character doesn’t matter. Well, if character doesn’t matter, then what was Martin Luther King asking people to judge people by?

The WaPo goes on to say:

Beck’s choice of day and place for the rally “is insulting, is what it is,” Marc Morial, president of the National Urban League, said in an interview Monday. “August 28 is something special. It is a day that means something in American history because it was the demonstration in the United States in support of civil rights.”
Beck’s plans are “an effort to embarrass and poke a finger in the eye of the civil rights community because Glenn Beck and his public utterances don’t necessarily demonstrate a consistency with the vision of King.”
Sharpton, who has planned a march that day to commemorate King’s legacy, says Beck’s rally contradicts King’s legacy. Sharpton said he began planning in April for his “Reclaim the Dream Rally,” which is scheduled to begin at Dunbar High School in Northwest Washington and end at the planned site of the King memorial on the Mall. The event, supported by the NAACP, the Urban League and Martin Luther King III, “is not a countermarch to Beck,” nor will the rally be about confrontation. U.S. Secretary of Education Arne Duncan will be among the participants, according to a news release from Sharpton’s National Action Network.

As you say, Rev. Sharpton. You and the NAACP just stay classy.

In Closing

Why Stacy McCain wasn’t invited to speak at the 8/28 event is not exactly clear. There may not be enough time for him to get back from speaking at the Gay Vanilla Pudding Manufacturers of Bulungi Convention in Yabba-Dabba. Perhaps he can catch an earlier flight out of Primo-Ganja Airport, but it’s probably too late to book him. Blame Erik Telford, and remember the Gooey Shoe Leather fund.

We cannot over-emphasize the falsehood of the Leftist attempts to tear down America and Americans, but we should certainly attend events like this and give it a solid American try, honor of those who’ve gone before us, and do everything positive and possible to return our country to its founding ideals.

‘When I Was Younger, So Much Younger Than Today . . .’

Posted on July 29, 2010Comments

On this date in 1965, the second Beatles movie, Help! premiered in London:

Of course, I found out about this on Twitter. Something else I saw on Twitter was this article by my young friend Chris Moody:

With the turn of a phrase, Minnesota Rep. Michelle Bachmann seemed to sum up last weekend’s RightOnline conference, an annual gathering of conservative activists.
“The sleeping giant is awake,” she declared, drawing a thunder of applause and cheering that could be heard across the fifth floor of the Venetian Hotel in Las Vegas, where the two-day event was held.
For years, the progressive Netroots Nation conference had monopolized the discussion about online activism. Republicans held the White House and Congress until November 2006, a reality that sparked a fury on the left and motivated them to dominate the online world.
The election of Barack Obama, however, turned much of that on its head.
For the first time ever, conservative blogs hold the top two slots in Technorati.com’s politicsl blog ranking, pushing The Huffington Post, the long-reigning champion, to the fifth slot. Conservative blogs also make up half of the top ten political blogs on the Web, while the distinctly liberal blogs only claim two spaces.

I had written a long post connecting these two thoughts, but the computer ate it. I blame Erik Telford.

Right Online: Seen and Heard

Posted on July 24, 2010July 24, 2010Comments

Just a few photos from the Right Online conference at the fabulous Venetian Resort Hotel.

Matt Lewis of Politics Daily gives a seminar on blogging, Twitter and other forms of online communication.

With Andrea Shea King of The Radio Patriot and Barbara Espinosa of American Freedom.

Hot Air’s Ed Morrissey said Allahpundit couldn’t make it to Right Online. Of course, the mysterious Allah could possibly show up and we wouldn’t know it.