“Send me your links and tips! No really, I mean that. If you’re in Tampa and reporting on the convention, I’d love to link your stuff. Tweet it to me @tabithahale, or shoot me an email at [email protected].”
— Tabitha Hale, “Convention Watch”
Category: Tabitha Hale
DON’T MISS IT: Steven Crowder Will Speak at BlogCon 2012 in Charlotte, N.C.
That’s right: My close personal friend Steven Crowder — follow him on Twitter — has been honored with an invitation to speak at BlogCon 2012, April 20-21, at the fabulous Hilton Center City in Charlotte, North Carolina. Here is Steven’s latest video, produced in association with the National Center for Public Policy Research:
Trust me, folks, you don’t want to miss BlogCon 2012. All the important people in conservative New Media will be there. IYKWIMATIYD.
Troglopundit Is Not Only an Acromegalic Sideshow Freak, But Is Also Wrong
My friend Lance Burri was once famous as the second ugliest conservative blogger in Wisconsin. That was before Sean Hackbarth and his ludicrous hipster soul-patch moved to Washington, D.C., however, and the Towering Man-Mountain of Cheeseland has since ascended to the pinnacle. But I digress . . .
Troglopundit has wasted several thousand pixels in defending the folly known as The Rick Perry “Only Conservative Who Can Beat Mitt” Bandwagon and, because his wrongness is so transcendently self-evident, I thought I’d link it, denouncing the Trog as a worthless varmint.
Just because he is my friend.
If Lance were my enemy, I’d praise him, and then he would be added to the Official Tabitha Hale List of Unimportant Bloggers™ on which list my own name is permanently foremost.
‘Get Crazy With The Cheese Whiz’
by Smitty
Pat in Shreveport sums it up for us: “I Suck”. I blogged from Afghanistan for much of 2011; Stacy’s gonzo efforts continue to this day. Yet we’re still clocking in somewhere between haggis and chopped liver on Director Blue’s roundup.
Last night, reached for comment at ~2300 EST, Stacy allowed he was on the way to crash “The Raucous Before the Caucus,” though he was dubious as to whether or not Tabitha Hale had been invited. At the mention of Director Blue’s post, Stacy recalled a diagram:
Cue the Beck:
I might also mention that I overheard a GPS unit in the background of Stacy’s cel phone, a severe blow to his Luddite cred.
Update: Nice Deb at least noticed us. 🙂
Congratulations, @PinkElephantPun!
Tabitha Hale has been hired by the Franklin Center, which means she is now a colleague of Erik Telford, forming an alliance of historic proportions: Lenin and Trotsky, Saccho and Vanzetti, Leopold and Loeb, Molotov and Ribbentrop, Hale and Telford.
The Franklin Center is a non-profit institution evidently dedicated to ensuring that I am never invited to speak on a conference panel.
When Tabitha sent the news to an e-mail list, I replied:
Congratulations, Tabitha. Of course, you can never be replaced, but which one of my worst enemies will fill the job opening at FreedomWorks? If anybody on the list is applying, let me know, and I’ll pre-emptively denounce you, which should count in your favor. On the other hand, if I hate you, I’ll give you a good recommendation that will permanently taint your reputation.
— RSM
Because I’m helpful like that.
#OccupyFail at #BlogCon11: What Fun!
For the second consecutive year, Tabitha Hale didn’t think I was important enough to be invited to participate on a panel at BlogCon.
Or maybe Tabitha just hates my guts.
Either way, she subsequently offered me a “scholarship” to attend BlogCon, a consolation prize I was too proud to accept.
Pity is no substitute for respect, and if nothing I have accomplished in the past three years is worth respecting, I’d rather not be there in person for a repeat of the humiliation Tabitha inflicted by leaving me off the BlogCon agenda last year.
Like I said, maybe she just hates my guts and I could deal with that, if she would admit that it’s her personal contempt for me that explained the repeated exclusions. Instead, she permits my peers (and readers) to believe that the exclusion represents the inadequacy of my professional accomplishments. People say I shouldn’t take it that way, but I can see no other explanation.
Either (a) my blog sucks or (b) my blog’s good and Tabitha hates me.
Anyway, the Occupy Denver crowd descended on the hotel where all the really important and popular bloggers are hanging out:
There’s about 20 of them. They’re fairly young and dirty and speak in a strange jargon like the Oasis Tribe in Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome.
Now they’re doing that “mike check” thing, and are chanting.
When the hell are the cops going to get here?
Also, when will the attendees at BlogCon realize that by confronting the Occupy scum, they’re imperiling their own health?
Good thing I’m not popular or important, or else I might be at BlogCon, contracting an incurable contagious disease.
UPDATE: Da Tech Guy risked his health by getting close enough to interview one of the Occupiers:
UPDATE II: Denver’s KUSA-TV reports:
DENVER – Denver Police responded to the Crowne Plaza Hotel Friday afternoon where several Occupy Denver protesters reportedly caused a disturbance.
According to reports, a group of conservative bloggers are at the hotel, which may have incited the chanting.
Did you catch that? The presence of “a group of conservative bloggers” at a hotel incited the disturbance — as if the Occupy Denver riffraff were just minding their own business until those nasty bloggers provoked them.
UPDATE III: The unpopular and unimportant Jeff Goldstein:
The Occupy Denver kiddies got wind of the conference and naturally have to protest it. Because, you know — well, because, uh, KOCH BROTHERS RACISM HATE HATE HATE!
Hundreds of bloggers with video-capable phones, and these morons decide we’re to be the target of their disjointed, intellectually scattershot “protests”?
That’s some strategy, that is.
UPDATE IV: “I am really starting to lose faith in the hippies of my generation.”
UPDATE V: Denver police: Not nearly brutal enough. Why aren’t they beating these hippies unmercifully?
Because hippies are white. And Denver cops are racist.
Refute that!
UPDATE VI: John Hawkins:
About 15 scruffy looking protesters arrived in the lobby with, as far as I can tell, no intention other than disrupting the conference.
They succeeded — but, not in the way they expected because after they started chanting, bloggers poured out of the conference to take pics and videos. Soon, there were 30 bloggers surrounding 15 Occupy people and chanting things like “We love Koch money” and “Breitbart, Breitbart!” There was lots of chanting, lots of yelling, and Steven Crowder got shoved by one of the female Occupiers.
Now a Memeorandum thread.
UPDATE VII: Sister Toldjah posts video:
UPDATE VIII: “Denver HS Teacher Brings Students to Join #OWS Mob As They Storm Conservative Conference (Video).”
A Venn Diagram Might Be Helpful
LAS VEGAS, Nevada
Last night at the CNN debate, somebody said, “Hey, have you seen Erik Telford?”
“No, is he here?”
“Yeah. He was on Twitter asking who was coming to Vegas for the Western Republican Leadership Conference.”
Well, I’d been busy covering the debate and hadn’t seen the Twitter message, and by the time I hit my deadline for The American Spectator, the fact that Telford was in town had slipped my mind.
Fast-forward to this morning. I had to go down to the drugstore to buy a razor, and was walking through the lobby of the hotel when a familiar figure walked past me. So I reached out and slugged Telford in the arm.
“Dude, why didn’t you call me?”
“I didn’t know you were in town — until you slugged me in the arm.”
“It wasn’t exactly a secret that I was coming to Vegas,” I said. “But I guess nobody reads my blog.”
“Well,” Telford said. “I figured you wouldn’t get invited.”
“Yeah, I invited myself. Because nobody ever invites me anywhere. Like BlogCon — can you believe Tabitha Hale left me off the list?”
Telford laughed. Because, of course, I’m always left off the list, unlike Stephen Kruiser, Katie Harbath, Cord Blomquist, Peter List, Frank Keegan, Dana Loesch, Larry O’Connor, John Nolte, Meredith Dake, Matthias Shapiro, Will Franklin, Brandon Stewart, Bill Beutler, Michael Sandoval, Ari Armstrong, Todd Shepherd, T.L. James, Kelly Maher, Andrew Malcom, Melissa Clouthier, Michelle Malkin, Steven Crowder, Jim Pethokoukis, Dean Clancy, Max Pappas, Ed Morrissey, Deneen Borelli, Ace of Spades, Kristina Ribali, Russ Walker . . .
Just like Telford didn’t call me when he got to Vegas — because nobody wants to hang out with me, right? — Tabitha didn’t invite me to BlogCon because she wants it to be a fun, exciting event featuring people who are actually important, influential and popular.
In an effort to understand this situation, I mentally envisioned Tabitha’s worldview as a Venn Diagram:
There is no “Set AB,” because these are non-intersecting sets.
Ergo, the very fact that you’re reading my blog means that you are not important and don’t really matter.
UPDATE: Tabitha accuses me of harassment? A historic first: Harassment with Venn Diagrams.
Meanwhile, this might be a good time to remind you that I’ll be speaking Oct. 29 at the Maryland Conservative Action Network’s “Turning the Tides” conference in Annapolis.
Major National Gathering of Conservative Bloggers Will Include Everyone But Me
These are the announced speakers and panelists at BlogCon 2011, Nov. 11-12, at the luxurious Crowne Plaza Denver Downtown Hotel in Denver.
Discussions about my attendance concluded abruptly after Tabitha Hale rejected my suggestion that I moderate a panel entitled, “Suckage 2.0: How to Become Completely Irrelevant as the Universal Laughingstock of the Conservative Blogosphere.”
Maybe next year . . .