The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

Hollywood Rocked by Another Shocking Natalie Portman Body-Double Scandal

Posted on | April 18, 2011 | 14 Comments

Let’s see: Politics, taxes, Libya — yep, I’ve covered all those insignificant trivial stories today. Time for some really important news:

Her dance double for Black Swan has claimed that she did hardly any of the full body shots seen in the film.
And now it is claimed that Natalie Portman used yet another body double for her latest film Your Highness.
In fact, the actress is said to have avoided diving into an icy lake in Belfast and a local Irish girl was paid just £250 to take the plunge instead.
Caroline Davis from Ulster was paid the sum of money to jump into the cold waters meaning that Portman avoided braving the freezing lake.
The Irish student told The Sun: ‘I’m a film studies student so I jumped at the chance to be on set.’

In the interest of getting to the bottom of this scandal, I’m obliged to provide these photos to let readers examine the evidence for themselves:

While you study the evidence — and trust me, I’ve examined it very closely myself — I’ll share some other important news: Gary Busey got fired from Celebrity Apprentice:

UPDATE: Ace of Spades reviewed Your Highness:

I think Natalie Portman’s butt, which you see a lot (at least in a tiny thong), is in fact CGI.

This will require more careful study of the images. Meanwhile, Jimmie Bise Jr. predicts the Internet reaction to this shocking news:

UPDATE II: Yes, Professor Glenn Reynolds, I’m calling you a cynic. Because if you were an altruistic idealist, you would have linked me. (Life in an egocentric universe — where the only standard is whether I get more blog-traffic — makes such moral distinctions very simple.)


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