The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

Voorhees Announces Late Entry to 2012 GOP Field; Huntsman Reportedly Worried

Posted on | October 24, 2011 | 10 Comments

T. Coddington Van Voorhees VII hears the call:

“With the President vulnerable and so many sensible government contracts at stake, they have persuaded me that the GOP electorate is yearning for the one voice in our party brave enough to consistently stand athwart the Tea Party lunacy. And, with the entire current Republican field variably afflicted with this madness, I could not help but relent to their entreaties. …
“And for my fellow sensible conservative Americans, let me assure you that in T. Coddington Van Voorhees VII you will now have a choice — not an echo. As the only Republican in this race who is dedicated to the future reduction in the rate of increase of the rate of increase of federal government, you can pull the lever in full confidence that your federally funded retirement and health care and education and automobiles and solar panel rebates will be preserved, in full accordance with conservative principles.”

We expect the Voorhees juggernaut will immediately challenge Jon Huntsman (Real Clear Politics average 2%) for the “margin of error” vote.

You may ask, what’s the difference between Coddy Voorhees and Jon Huntsman? Well, one of them is a complete joke.

And the other is a satirical character created by Iowahawk.


10 Responses to “Voorhees Announces Late Entry to 2012 GOP Field; Huntsman Reportedly Worried”

  1. Elize Nayden
    October 24th, 2011 @ 11:30 am

    TCVV7 Bumpersticker:

    “Give me moderation and compromise or deaths of mutinous peasants!”

  2. Anonymous
    October 24th, 2011 @ 11:32 am

    Actually they are both complete jokes, the difference is one of them is funny the other pathetic.

  3. Joe
    October 24th, 2011 @ 12:08 pm

    At least T. Coddington Van Voorhees VIII (or is it VII) knows the value and merit of a well made cocktail. 

    No that is not an anti Mormon slam, but establishment Republicans do find self medication with top shelf alcohol to be helpful in social and personal interactions. 

  4. Joe
    October 24th, 2011 @ 12:33 pm

    It helps them forget about abandoning all pretense of principle. 

  5. Joe
    October 24th, 2011 @ 12:34 pm

    I am not sure what method Huntsman uses…maybe self hypnosis. 

  6. ackvil
    October 24th, 2011 @ 2:22 pm

    Only one of them is a complete joke?

  7. Thurston Howell III
    October 24th, 2011 @ 3:22 pm

    I like the cut of his jib!  Finally, a candidate I can talk to my friends at the country club about.

  8. Joe
    October 24th, 2011 @ 5:19 pm

    So they finally got internet to the Island.  Okay, MaryAnn or Ginger?  (Don’t worry, I will not tell Mrs. Howell). 

  9. gahrie
    October 24th, 2011 @ 11:02 pm

    The Professor built a satillite phone out of some spare transistors and a dozen coconuts………

  10. Thurston Howell III
    October 25th, 2011 @ 1:02 pm

    A gentleman never tells, old boy.