Not only would he have saved money by shopping our Amazon “Black Friday Deals Week” specials, but he’d probably still be alive:
SOUTH CHARLESTON, W.Va. (WSAZ) — A man collapsed while doing some Black Friday shopping in a crowded store, and people nearby continued to shop.
Witnesses tell WSAZ.com some shoppers walked around and even over the man’s body.
Family members tell WSAZ.com that Walter Vance, of Logan County, W.Va., passed away after being taken to the hospital.
It happened at Target in the Southridge Shopping Center in South Charleston about 12:15 a.m. Friday.
Our condolences to the family and friends of the deceased. While my major motivation in promoting Amazon “Black Friday Deals Week” specials is capitalist greed — I get a small commission on each sale — humanitarian idealists can comfort themselves with the knowledge that they’re preventing senseless holiday shopping tragedies.
Shop Amazon: The Life You Save May Be Your Own!
UPDATE: In the interest of public safety, let me point out some of the great bargains you can get at Amazon this week:
- Up to 60% off exquisite luxury watches
— Cartier, Baume & Mercier, Victorinox, Chopard and many other brands, both for men and women.
- Save 36% on a 42-inch HD TV
— Regularly $799.99, now only $509.98 and eligible for free Super Saver shipping!
- Madden NFL 12 for XBox 360
— Just $39.99 (a savings of 33%) for this exciting game the whole family can enjoy.
It’s a fact: Nobody has ever died while shopping our Amazon links.
UPDATE II: More life-saving bargains:
- Awesome jewelry savings
— Hey, you don’t have to tell her you only paid $44.99 for those diamond earrings
.
- Special Offers in Amazon’s Grocery and Gourmet Store
.
- Finally, for you thrill-seekers — OK, we understand that not everybody cares about safety. But instead of risking your life on the way to the mall, how about trying this Scooter X 163cc Sport Kart Go Kart for $810
?
Don’t worry, though: Amazon also sells motorcycle helmets
LOL
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RIP, my thoughts and prayers for his family and friends.
But like mountain-climbing, Black Friday shopping entails known risks. People were trampled to death the last two years prior, and a large number of injuries typically sustained – including accidents and assaults.
The way these sales are promoted resembles throwing handfuls of currency into the air in a crowd: someone is likely to get hurt.
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