Feminists, and How to Avoid Them

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Miriam Mogilevsky (@sondosia on Twitter) doesn’t like men, but evidently those sexist oppressors won’t leave her alone:

I started to understand my frustrations with my male friends, roommates, and partners much better, because these imbalances have touched every single relationship I’ve ever had with a man. Male partners have consistently ignored glaring issues in the relationship so that I had to be the one to start the difficult conversation every single time, even though they supposedly had as much of a stake in the relationship as I did. Male roommates have made me beg and plead and send reminder texts to do even the most basic household management tasks. Male friends have tried to use me as a therapist, or drawn me into worrying about their physical health with them while refusing to see a doctor even though they had insurance.
Well-meaning men of varying roles in my life have consistently ignored my nonverbal cues, even very visible ones, forcing me to constantly have to articulate boundaries that ought to be obvious, over and over. . . .
This is why being in relationship with men, even platonically, is often so exhausting for me. As much as I love them and care for them, it feels like work.

You can read the rest. Miriam Mogilevsky is a feminist because she doesn’t like men, and yet men won’t take the hint. This is a persistent problem. Some males actually believe that feminism is about equality. They think, “Well, I believe in equality, so I’m a feminist, too,” and then intrude themselves into the lives of feminists like Miriam Mogilevsky, who don’t want to be anywhere near a man, ever. Merely being in the presence of a male is “exhausting” to feminists. They have made abundantly clear what feminism requires of men:

A. Shut up;
and
B. Go away.

As soon as a woman indicates that she is a feminist, this should be a cue to any man to avoid her as much as possible. No male should ever speak to a feminist. In fact, the feminist expects males to be completely silent in her presence. How much more clearly can Miriam Mogilevsky make her point? Everything that men do is annoying to her. Attempts by males to befriend Ms. Mogilevsky are unwelcome. She is a feminist, and therefore dislikes having to share the planet with males, because of “the fear and anger with which some men respond to women’s emotional unavailability.” Ms. Mogilevsky is a feminist, and therefore has no emotion toward men except disgust and contempt. Why can’t these men understand what Miriam Mogilevsky is trying to tell them?

Emotional labor is reassuring my partner over and over that yes, I love him, yes, I find him attractive, yes, I truly want to be with him, because he will not do the work of developing his self-esteem and relies on me to bandage those constantly-reopening wounds. Emotional labor is letting my partner know that I didn’t like what he did sexually last night, because he never asked me first if I wanted to do that. Emotional labor is reassuring him that, no, it’s okay, I’m not mad, I just wanted him to know for next time, yes, of course I love him, no, this doesn’t mean I’m not attracted to him, I’m just not interested in that sort of sex. Emotional labor is not being able to rely on him to reassure me that it’s not my fault that I didn’t like the sex, because this conversation has turned into my reassuring him, again. . . .
Emotional labor is managing my male partners’ feelings around how often we have sex, and soothing their disappointment when they expected to have sex (even though I never said we would) and then didn’t, and explaining why I didn’t want to have sex this time, and making sure we “at least cuddle a little before bed” even though after all of this, to be quite honest, the last thing I f–king want is to touch him.

Miriam Mogilevsky does not like sex with men, because she does not like men, and she is tired of doing the “emotional labor” of pretending otherwise. She is tired of men with low self-esteem who expect her to pretend she is capable of “love” for a male and being “attracted” to a male, although no male “partner” ever does anything right.

Guys, what part of shut up and go away don’t you understand?

Emotional labor is when my partners decide they don’t want to be in a relationship with me anymore, but rather than directly communicating this to me, they start ignoring me or being mean for weeks until I have to ask what’s going on, hear that “I guess I’m just not into you anymore,” and then have to be the one to suggest breaking up. For extra points, then I have to comfort them about the breakup.

This is “because most men have been intentionally deprived of the language and tools to even think about these sorts of issues,” Ms. Mogilevsky complains of her ex-boyfriends. Even when the guy takes the hint — shut up and go away — he does it wrong.

Miriam Mogilevsky is 24 years old. She got her bachelor’s degree in psychology from Northwestern University in 2013 and recently completed a master’s degree in social work at Columbia University. She takes a sadistic pleasure in inspiring fear in men, and evidently believes that what the world needs most is more feminist lectures from Miriam Mogilevsky. She is a walking stereotype of the self-important narcissistic Millennial who expects us to be impressed that she is “passionate about social justice, feminism, sexuality [and] atheism,” as if there weren’t at least 10,000 young feminists exactly like her on Tumblr.

They are a dime a dozen, these fervent young progressives, providing an endless supply of “social justice” that far exceeds anyone’s actual demand. One wonders why they bother to go to college at all, as no special training is necessary to whine and complain, which is all they ever do. When they get out into the real world and discover how hard it is to make a living, they’ll whine and complain about that. Miriam Mogilevsky whines and complains that men are craving her companionship, compelling her to engage in “relationships” in which she is expected to perform “emotional labor.” And this a social injustice.

Guys: Learn to take a hint. Learn to walk away.

If a woman tells you she is a feminist, say nothing and walk away.

No feminist wants to hear what a man has to say, and life is too short to waste your time talking to feminists. Just walk away.

Leave feminists alone, and then they can complain about that.




 

115 comments

  4. So funny to see girls with Histrionic Personality Disorder claim to have a deep well of emotions from which to draw.

  5. “…men are craving her companionship.” No, they probably just want sex. Men are simple creatures.

  6. What is she doing with men? She obviously doesn’t like them. and then she whines about them. Life is hard–or impossible–when you believe it should work according to how you think it ought to be.

  7. In fairness to this poor little flower, her poor opinion of men is probably justly derived from the fact that she can only attract/select lower quality men for her social circles.

  8. Imagine the kind of men who attend Columbia University and who are so desperate for female companionship they would date Miriam.

    If she hates these guys, can we blame her?

  9. ” her poor opinion of men is probably justly derived from the fact that she can only attract/select lower quality men for her social circles.”

    i once heard comedian Katt Williams put forth this opinion, although he did put it more… crassly than you did.

  11. Are any of these men given names that can be traced? How much of this is just fiction?

    Reading her remarks, I’ll offer the hypothesis that her problem is (1) gross self-centeredness and (2) low-grade malevolence. It’s not just young men who would be well-advised to steer clear of her for the time being.

    Give thanks you’re not a close relation. (From personal experience, it surprises me not one bit that she’s studying social work. That’s a trade which seems to be a collecting pool of the hopeless).

  13. She’ll pass for certain purposes. One does wonder if the phrase ‘the personal is the political’ is an admission against interest. You look at pictures of Ann Dunham, to take one example, and what hits you is that the red haze politics may have been a function of a socially isolated and drab young woman’s efforts to make herself distinctive (even if only in her own mind).

  14. You recall Dan Ackroyd playing a parody of James Jackson Kilpatrick. He closed one exchange with this:

    But hell hath no fury like a woman’s scorn, and Michelle Triola, like a
    screeching, squealing, reptatious swamp sow is after actor Lee Marvin’s
    last three million dollars. I guess what you and Michelle are saying is
    that when you’re on your backs, the meter is running. Well, please spare
    us, gals, and tell us the rate’s at the top. Then we can choose which
    two bit tarts and bargain basement sluts to shack up with.

  15. That is the perfect response to these girls.

    And just when you think feminists can’t get any lower there is something like this. Their agenda can be summed up in a single word: degradation.

  16. I’d have to agree with that, and they’re immature, and inexperienced with relationships. It seems like they’re dating children. A lot of the things these women stated they would like out of their partner, like how to read them better, planning a date, or vacation, etc. seemed like a given for any man is engaged in the relationship, thinks for himself, or has spent anytime involved with a woman. Am I wrong? Or do a lot of men neglect and avoid those things?

  17. Miriam Mogilevsky does not like sex with men because she cannot attract the men she wants. If she looked like Kate Upton, she could attract attractive men with good self-esteem and we wouldn’t be having this conversation.

  20. Men are supposed to read her mind:

    “Well-meaning men of varying roles in my life have consistently ignored my nonverbal cues, even very visible ones, forcing me to constantly have to articulate boundaries that ought to be obvious…”

    But she prefers direct verbal communication:

    “…rather than directly communicating this to me, they start ignoring me or being mean for weeks until I have to ask what’s going on…”

  21. Our Rules
    1. Men are NOT mind readers.
    1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
    You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down..
    We need it up, you need it down.
    You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
    1. Sunday sports.  It’s like the full moon
    or the changing of the tides.

    Let it be.
    1. Crying is blackmail.
    1. Ask for what you want.
    Let us be clear on this one:
    Subtle hints do not work!
    Strong hints do not work!
    Obvious hints do not work!

    Just say it!
    1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
    1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s
    what we do.
    Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
    1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
    In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
    1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are.

    Don’t ask us.
    1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the
    ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
    1. You can either ask us to do something
    or tell us how you want it done.

    Not both.
    If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
    1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
    1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
    1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
    Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
    We have noidea what mauve is.
    1. If it itches, it will be scratched.

    We do that.
    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say ‘nothing,’ We will act like
    nothing’s wrong.
    We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
    1. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer
    you don’t want to hear.
    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine…Really.
    1. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to
    discuss such topics as baseball or motor sports.
    1. You have enough clothes.
    1. You have too many shoes.
    1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape !
    1. Thank you for reading this.

    Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight.
    But did you know men really don’t mind that?  It’s like camping.

  22. Not put too fine a point on it, but this young lady iis a classic perpetrator of domestic abuse. Early in my career, I dealt with numerous family therapists and psychologists who would diagnose this young woman’s problem in a heartbeat. The “I hate men” business is purely incidental. Her descriptions of the evolution of her relationships are classic. This dynamic is not limited to physically violent situations but is quite common in purely an emotional sense. Whether she has a male or female partner it matters not. She’s always going to have the same problems, because she’s the once creating them.

  23. And like most feminists she thinks abusing her partners, especially the males, is her prerogative, and she’s entitled to do so. I hate to say it, but I dated a young woman like this once, and to say it didn’t end well would be a huge understatement. Dealing with her endless emotional needs, and demands was too taxing, and one day I simply screamed “cunt!”, walked out, and never spoke to her again.

  24. Abusive personalities cut across sex lines. What’s insidious about the females is they can use Feminism’s institutional misandry as cover for their otherwise emotional torture. It’s sort of like how psychopaths gravitated to the NKVD. Feminism gives them an outlet and makes their abusive behavior a glorious protest against the Patriarchy.

  25. If you have to use post-it notes to remind yourself how to treat your friends then they’re not your friends. That’s called being phony.

  26. I’ve never understood the toilet seat thing. Do women get groggy when they enter a bathroom? Do they shit in the dark? Do they reach into the medicine cabinet when it’s closed?

  27. I don’t think she understands the kind of men she wants to be with are precisely the ones who want nothing to do with her.

  28. Is there any way to be certain that the lovely Miriam is interacting with men rather than male aliens from Guelp XIV? These descriptions don’t seem to be of men of the human variety.

  29. Reading a lot of things feminists say right out in the open, no longer hidden in textbooks, made me realize you have to be a really hateful, and sick person to stand behind this movement. Feminazi continues to be an apt term.

  30. I was thinking that, too. I’ve been married for 31 years, and I don’t recognize any of those behaviors.

  32. Well-meaning men of varying roles in my life have consistently ignored my nonverbal cues, even very visible ones, forcing me to constantly have to articulate boundaries that ought to be obvious, over and over. . . .

    She apparently isn’t paying enough attention to them, reading their own non-verbal cues (even very visible ones) to figure out that this is how men are. If she wants a mind-reader who’s going to hang on her every unspoken word, what she needs is a puppy.

    If she wants to have a worthwhile relationship with a man, she needs to try understanding them instead of expecting them to just magically know WTF she wants but goes to such tremendous lengths to AVOID saying.

    That tired old “If you loved me I wouldn’t have to tell you these things” crap was immature and infuriating when her grandmother was doing it.

  33. W.T.F. is that crap!!!

    I’m a woman,and I could only scan the article because I was getting so pissed off. I know I shouldn’t let myself get PO’d by the gibberings of mental defectives (one with a pole dancer name, and the other two with just stupid made-up names, which is good, so that right away you realize you’re dealing with morons).

    The pole dancer claimed to have worked in “tech and finance” where her “sexuality was used against” her. LIAR! I’ve worked in both, and as a woman, I know that the only way that this is even possibly the case (and even that is remote) is if you have no tech or financial chops.

    Cripes. I wish I hadn’t followed that link. You should have put a trigger warning on it. : )

  34. I’m a woman and even I don’t get nonverbal cues. You have to just speak plainly with me, or *zing*, right over my head.

    I’ve also never heard of an actual, real man who needed constant reassurance of love and attractiveness. From what I’ve noticed, they know you love them when you’re still there the next day. And they know they’re attractive when they touch you and you get all squirmy and squishy.

    I wouldn’t want to room with that idiot girl, that’s for sure. I know they say that women are from Venus and men are from Mars, but this chick is from….(heh, you know what I wanted to say here)…Pluto.

  35. This is true. Which is why you don’t have sex with one until you’re married. That’s the ONLY way you’re going to be able to force him to put his own clothes in the hamper or his dishes in the dishwasher. Or really, any other thing, because he’s only going to do house stuff in the hopes of seeing your thingies on a regular basis.

  36. She’s a shrew, and they had to know that going in, so they’re only in it for the sex. As soon as the troublesomeness exceeds the value of the sex, so as to make it no longer worth it, they’ll be gone.

    I’ve found that if you really want a man to be engaged in the relationship, you have to attract him in a multitude of ways that go beyond sex. Which is the same way he attracts a woman. Sex is the icing on the cake, and if there’s no cake, there’s no substance.

    That’s my experience, anyway.

  37. I know, and I’m sorry! I find it so infuriating, and degrading as well. She’s worse than a pole dancer. She’s an online dominatrix whose specialty is taking money off of men. That’s quite literally what’s behind this. I didn’t buy her story, either. It’s all projection, and denial. In reality they’re just insufferable, and arrogant and people are instantly turned off by them. It’s the same with all these women; they are the agents of their own discontent but their pathological narcissism keeps them blind to the source.

    I would love McCain to report on this!

  38. I suspect the only males who would be willing to be with this basket case would likely have many more issues than just absolutely no self-esteem. This is kind of “chicken-and-egg” thing at work here…

  39. She doesn’t even have to look like Kate Upton, is the thing. Maybe Kate can stand on looks alone, but I’ve found that once a man has watched me field strip a gun, make a homemade pie, and had me successfully diagnose his engine problem, the battle is won.

    Miss Miriam thinks she doesn’t need to bring anything to the party.

  40. They need to live on a farm in the boonies. That’ll either straighten them out, or they’ll die, one or the other.

  41. She writes:

    Emotional labor is letting my partner know that I didn’t like what he did sexually last night, because he never asked me first if I wanted to do that.

    Well, if you don’t like the Thor costume, five pounds of silly putty and the wok, then say so up front, dammit!

    Wait. Why are you people looking at me like that?

  43. Dalrock says that feminism is ugly because it “teaches women to be misers with love.” In Miriam’s case it sounds like laziness, but only the beautiful afford to be as lazy as Miriam.

  44. Of course. She does not love them. Who would? To borrow from Groucho Marx, no one could love a man who would keep her as a girlfriend.

  45. “How much of this is just fiction?”

    Given the penchant of these SJW types to create and perpetuate hoaxes and false rape allegations, I’d be willing to bet that these more low-intensity, low-risk social “experiences” are nearly all fiction.

    What’s not outright fiction is probably warped perception.

  46. “It’s sort of like how psychopaths gravitated to the NKVD.”

    No, it’s exactly like how psychopaths gravitated to the NKVD.

    Feminism is a totalitarian movement, and these women are just Nikolai Yezhov in skirts.

  47. Sometimes better. You can have awesome sex on the couch, and not have to remove pine needles from sensitive parts of the anatomy later. Or do tick checks.

  48. “Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. “

    I know, right? This is the obverse of women’s complaint that men don’t share our feelings. A woman will tell you about some problem in her life that is making her miserable, not because she thinks you can help her, but because sharing her prblems makes her feel better. Guys don’t share our problems because we don’t expect anyone to care how we feel because — surprise! — no one cares how guys feel.

    Women, especially, don’t give a damn about a guy’s feelings. Women don’t respect men who are emotional and sensitive. Women want men to be stoic heroes. Guys are supposed to be omniscient and omnicompetent, to always solve problems and never cause problems. If a guy has any sense at all, he understands this, and strives to perform as expected, because failure to perform as expected is simply failure. Guys are never victims; guys are never oppressed. Guys are either winners or losers and nobody loves a loser. We understand this, which is why guys are so competitive and — guess what? — being competitive results in success. However, feminists interpret male success as evidence of unfairness. Feminists see life as a zero-sum game, where the only way anyone has anything is by taking it away from someone else., and they are therefore determined to prevent males from succeeding, because the more males fail, the more “equality” there will be.

  49. Chronic complainers (such as social justice warriors) are masters of bias confirmation and self-fulfilling prophecies.

    They seek out (maybe unconsciously; maybe not) the sort of males who will prove their theories right at every turn.

    Yes, that sort of man is out there. He’s usually had A LOT of drugs.

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