by Smitty
Somebody forgot to wind Epstein’s suicide watch.
Twitter, of course, is on the case:
1/ Jeremy Corbyn called in a favor from John Brennan, who had a couple of retired CIA agents whisk Epstein to a midget sub that will now make a trans-Atlantic run.
Upon arrival in the UK, Epstein will denounce Boris Johnson as super-freaky-deaky weirdo
— Medieval Knievel Gets Over Macho Grande FTW (@smitty_one_each) August 10, 2019
2/ with tastes as outlandish as his hairstyle. Pixelated deepfakes bolster the tale, as well as sales of niche leather goods, and the UK government collapses, catapulting Corbyn into power and delaying Brexit.
— Medieval Knievel Gets Over Macho Grande FTW (@smitty_one_each) August 10, 2019
I should have said: they ride through the Chunnel.
3/ History proved full of kinks at that point.
Macron, anxious rid himself of the gilets jaunes, cuts a deal with them, and they ride through the tunnel. There happens to be space for them some 38 miles southwest, in Hastings, so they go there.
And get rowdy.
— Medieval Knievel Gets Over Macho Grande FTW (@smitty_one_each) August 10, 2019
4/ Corbyn and some bobbies go down to negotiate, and a brawl breaks out, and tragedy strikes Corbyn.
And that is the tale of how, 953 years on, the Normans conquered England a second time, due to a lecherous American.
— Medieval Knievel Gets Over Macho Grande FTW (@smitty_one_each) August 10, 2019
Also skeptical:
Da Tech Guy
Ace of Spades
Legal Insurrection