The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

‘No Stranger to Law Enforcement’

Posted on | December 20, 2021 | Comments Off on ‘No Stranger to Law Enforcement’

Say hello to 32-year-old Davis Howard Jr., who was behind the wheel of a speeding Maserati in Bunnell, Florida, when a Flagler County deputy blue-lighted him and Howard took off — because, really, what’s the point of driving a Maserati if you can’t try to outrun cops once in a while?

The high-speed chase ended only after “stop sticks” were deployed:

During that high-speed chase, Howard called his mother and she was the one who eventually got him to stop the car, according to deputies.
A woman in the car with him also tried to get him to stop, she told deputies.

So nice of him to call his mom. More from the sheriff’s office:

It was determined that Howard had a suspended license since 4/4/2016.
A probable cause search of the vehicle was conducted and multiple illegal drugs were found. Deputies recovered 44 white pills, identified as Oxycodone, in the driver’s door compartment, along with 12g of marijuana. In the center cup holder, deputies recovered 8.2g marijuana and on the rear right passenger seat was a small black bag containing two small baggies with an additional 200 Oxycodone pills. A total of 44g of Oxycodone was recovered and $5,651 was seized.
Howard is no stranger to law enforcement and has been charged 43 times in Florida, with nine felony convictions. He’s previously been charged for Grand Theft of a Motor Vehicle, Carrying a Concealed Weapon, Tampering with Physical Evidence, Destroying Evidence, Flee and Elude Law Enforcement, Use or Display of Firearm During Felony, Possession of Weapon/Ammo by Convicted Felon, Possession of Marijuana with Intent to Sell, Possession of Cocaine, Possession of a Controlled Substance, Possession of Synthetic Cannabinoids, Possession of a Controlled Substance without Prescription, Possession of Methamphetamine with Intent to Sell, Possession of Cocaine with Intent to Sell, Aggravated Assault with a Deadly Weapon, Aggravated Battery on Law Enforcement Officer with Motor Vehicle, Use Under 18 Years Old to Sell/Deliver Meth, Trafficking Opium, Trafficking Controlled Substances, and Trafficking Phenethylamines. He’s also been charged in Illinois on multiple felony drug charges.

Evidently, he’s been a full-time criminal his entire life, but for some reason was not behind bars, and was instead driving around Florida in a Maserati. Here’s video of the pursuit and arrest:

 

Some of my libertarian friends are against “The War on Drugs,” but if drugs were legal, how would someone like Davis Howard Jr. be able to afford a Maserati? Making drugs illegal creates lucrative opportunities for, uh . . . Well, people who wouldn’t be obeying the laws no matter what the laws were. I mean, it’s not illegal to own a Maserati, but it is illegal to drive with a suspended license. Criminals don’t obey traffic laws the same way they don’t obey drug laws or gun laws or just about any other law you’d care to name. What’s the point of having any laws at all, if you think it’s social injustice to put criminals in jail? Because that’s what really inspires the notion that we shouldn’t be locking up drug dealers, i.e., the “disparate impact” argument. When I think back on my own youthful career in freelance pharmaceutical distribution, the fact that I was a suburban white boy didn’t make me exempt from law-enforcement scrutiny. I didn’t have “white privilege,” but I also wasn’t driving around in a Maserati — a spectacularly stupid thing to do, when you’re hauling contraband. While I don’t want to turn this blog into a how-to guide for drug dealers, permit me to observe that a used Volkswagen is a lot less conspicuous than a late-model sports car. Just sayin’ . . .

There are two kinds of drug dealers:

  1. Smart guys who keep a low profile;
    and
  2. Idiots who drive around in flashy cars and go to prison.

We know which category Davis Howard Jr. belongs to:

Howard was arrested for Trafficking Oxycodone 25g or More, Fleeing with Disregard of Safety to Persons/Property, Driving While License Suspended with Knowledge, Selling of Oxycodone, and Possession of Marijuana 20g or more. He was transported to the Sheriff Perry Hall Inmate Detention Facility and is being held on $160,500 bond.

On the advice of my attorney, Bert the Samoan Lawyer, I’ll note that anything written here about my own youthful behavior is fiction, as far as you know. But I damned sure wasn’t driving a Maserati.




 

Category: Crime, Florida

Rule Five Sunday: Nadezhda Zhukova

Posted on | December 20, 2021 | Comments Off on Rule Five Sunday: Nadezhda Zhukova

— compiled by Wombat-socho

Remember that Russian nurse who showed up for work at the mens’ ward of a hospital in Tula wearing almost nothing under her transparent PPE? The New York Post remembered, God bless them, and followed up with a story about how she not only kept her nursing job (despite angry noises from her bosses) but picked up a modeling gig with Zasport, a Russian sportswear company whose gear is worn by Russian Olympians. Here’s a shot of her demonstrating some of their gear.
Ceterum autem censeo Silicon Valley esse delendam.

Miss Zhukova doing the modeling thing (h/t EBL)

Ninety Miles From Tyranny: Hot Pick of the Late Night, The 90 Miles Mystery Box Episode #1568, Morning Mistress, and Girls With Guns.

Animal Magnetism: Rule Five Populism Friday, and the Saturday Gingermageddon. 

EBL: Banned By YouTube, NYC Covid Explosion (featuring our gal Zhukova), The Deep Dark Woods, Barbara Eden, Swan Song, Westworld Season 4 Preview, Miracle On 34th Street, Christmas Holiday, Inger Støjberg, Julie Michaels, Mazzy Star, Blast Of Silence, Rie Sinclair, Janice Dean, and Julie London.

A View From The Beach: Hanna Montazami, Fish Pic Friday – Renee Waddick, Warp Nine, Scotty!, It’s Tattoo Thursday, Some Wednesday Wetness, Do It Like, The Monday Morning Stimulus, Sunday Sunrise, and Just Shake It Off, Taylor.

Thanks to everyone for all the luscious links!

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Visit Amazon’s Intimate Apparel Shop
Shop Sex & Sensuality Gifts




Category: Rule 5

Colts Beat Patriots 27-17; Taylor Rushes for 170 Yards; Playoff Race Tightens

Posted on | December 19, 2021 | Comments Off on Colts Beat Patriots 27-17; Taylor Rushes for 170 Yards; Playoff Race Tightens

What happened Saturday night to the Patriots in Indianapolis was a brutal reminder that every winning streak must ultimately end. Not only did the Colts break New England’s seven-game winning streak, but it was the first time Indianpolis had beaten the Patriots since 2009, when Peyton Manning was the Colts’ quarterback — a game remembered by every New England fan as the 4th-and-2. Indianapolis running back Jonathan Taylor looked very much like the league MVP Saturday, rushing for 170 yards on 29 carries, including the 67-yard TD run in the fourth quarter that capped the 27-17 victory for the Colts.

Andrew Callahan of the Boston Herald:

Patriots rookie quarterback Mac Jones overcame a pair of interceptions to lead three straight scoring drives in the fourth quarter. He went 26-of-45 for 299 yards, two touchdowns and the two picks. Tight end Hunter Henry caught both scores.
The Pats’ special teams proved disastrous all night, starting with a blocked punt returned for a touchdown in the first quarter. All together, they gifted 10 points to the Colts, who produced just 105 yards of offense outside of Taylor.

The blocked punt near the end of the first quarter followed a perfect third-down pass from Jones to Jakobi Meyers that would have been a first down if Meyers hadn’t dropped it. People who didn’t follow Mac Jones as closely as I did during his championship season with Alabama can’t imagine how frustrating it is for Crimson Tide fans to see dropped passes like that. I mean, Devonta Smith never dropped a ball that I can remember, and he certainly never had a drop that hurt the Tide as bad as Meyers’ drop Saturday hurt the Patriots. After the blocked punt (the third time that’s happened to New England this season), the Colts had a 14-0 lead, and the Indianapolis game plan — shut down the Patriots’ running game and force Jones to throw — was already a success, but that one dropped pass made all the difference. Catch the damned ball.

Excuse me if I seem to be over-emphasizing this, but my dad played end in high school — earning All-Valley honors — and he couldn’t stand to see a dropped pass. The idea of a professional wide receiver dropping a perfectly thrown ball the way Jakobi Meyers did? Man, I hate to imagine what the old man would have said about that play. On the other hand, because I was watching the game with my brother Kirby (it was on NFL Network, so we went to a restaurant and had dinner while watching it on the big screen), I didn’t really have to imagine it. Anyway . . .

Mistakes cost the Patriots the game, pure and simple. For example, with less than five minutes left in the first half, the Patriots went driving down the field — Jones hit Kendrick Bourne for 15 yards, Rhamondre Stevenson ran for 13 yards, and then Jones hit Hunter Henry for 25 yards to give New England a first down at the Indianapolis 22. On first down, Meyer gains nine yards on an end-around, so it’s second-and-1 at the Colts’ 13 at the two-minute warning. Everybody watching the game had to figure that, at a minimum, the Patriots would get a field goal out of it, and go into the locker room trailing 14-3, but the way they were moving the ball, it seemed likely the drive would end in a touchdown. So, we return from the two-minute warning and tight end Jonnu Smith jumps before the snap, a five-yard penalty that turned it into second-and-6. One play later, on 3rd-and-3, Jones tries to throw to Hunter Henry in the middle of coverage — picked off. Mac took the blame for that:

“I just threw it right to him. It was a good play, but unacceptable. You can’t win until you stop from losing. I mean, I handed the ball to the guy. I did that twice, and that hurt us. I thought the defense played pretty well, and I just shot them in the foot myself by giving them the short field and giving them the ball. That’s just my fault and I’ll learn from it, but I’m not going to be gun-shy or anything. (I’ll) just learn from it and move on.”

Well, yeah, but that false start penalty hurt. How the hell do you get all the way to the NFL and you can’t remember the snap count? The QB can’t say that in a press conference, of course, but from 2nd-and-1, you almost always get the first down, and that five-yard penalty was crucial to why that drive ended in failure. But as bad as it was — and there are no “moral victories” in the NFL — there were a few bright lights in the darkness.

This Jones pass to N’Keal Harry, for example:

Third-and-6 from his own 42-yard line, Jones drops back all the way to the 31 and then launches a rocket, with Harry making a leaping grab at the Indianapolis 15. A deep pass like that is the perfect rebuttal to the various analysts who keep saying Mac has a “weak arm.”

Also, the critics say, Jones is “not athletic,” but look at him scramble for 12 yards and a first down early in the game:

OK, so that’s not a Lamar Jackson-level run, but the way critics talk about Mac’s alleged lack of “mobility” (translation: he’s white), you wouldn’t think he was capable of running that far or even escaping pressure in the pocket. But now look at this third-down pass to Meyers:

That is an excellent example of football IQ. Jones displayed that eyes-in-the-back-off-his-head sense of the pressure that great quarterbacks have, stepping up away from the pressure and making a tough throw into the middle of the field. As much as Meyers hurt the team with his later drop, he’s usually an excellent receiver — Mac’s favorite target, in fact.

Because Jones is a rookie, and stepping into the gigantic shoes of the GOAT, Tom Brady — “Saint Thomas of Foxboro,” in the eyes of New England fans — the aftermath of Saturday’s loss is going to involve a lot of criticism focused on Mac. This is a week where it will be painful to watch any of the ESPN/Fox News panel shows, as they endlessly discuss whether or not Jones is an “elite quarterback” (a phrase overused by NFL analysts the way “suburban swing voter” is overused by political pundits).

Football is a team sport, and the media obsession with star players — especially quarterbacks — is annoying to me. Whatever anybody says on ESPN, the simple fact is, Mac Jones didn’t lose that game.

Yeah, he threw two interceptions, and his QBR was just 54, but there was plenty of blame to go around. Penalties — dear God, the penalties! The first-quarter drive on which Jones hit that third-down pass to Meyers might have gone all the way, but on 2nd-and-nine, when Jones hit Jonnu Smith for 14 yards, which should have given New England a first down at the Indianapolis 33, Patriots tackle Shaq Mason was called for ineligible receiver downfield. That made it 2nd-and-14, then there was a delay-of-game penalty (Mac’s fault, ultimately), so instead of first-and-10 in Colts’ territory, now the Patriots have it 2nd-and-19 at their own 43. Then on third down, Jones got sacked for a 15-yard loss, so the once-promising drive turned to crap because of mistakes by the offensive line, first Mason’s penalty, and then tackle Isaiah Wynn missing the block that allowed the sack. New England finished the night with eight penalties for 50 yards, which is just unacceptable for a team in the playoff hunt this late in the season. You can’t play sloppy football like that in a crucial game against a team like Indianapolis, which was hungry for a win to keep their own playoff hopes alive. Nevertheless, at 9-5, the Patriots are still very much a contender, leading the AFC East as they get ready for next week’s home game against the second-place Buffalo Bills. Win that game, and the shame of losing to the Colts will be forgotten.

Remember, the only reason I’ve become obsessed with New England this season is because they drafted Mac Jones in the first round, so I now refer to the Patriots with first-person plural pronouns — “we,” “us,” “ours” — the same as I do the Crimson Tide. Jones could become the first rookie quarterback in NFL history to make it to the Super Bowl, and I don’t care what any ESPN “experts” say, I think the kid has what it takes to do it. Oh, he’s not athletic, he’s not mobile, he’s got a weak arm, all the experts say, but look at this clutch pass to Hunter Henry:

Late in the third quarter, trailing 20-0, third-and-four, under pressure and — BOOM! — he makes an incredible throw across the field for a first down. That drive ended in a touchdown, and the Patriots very nearly came back to win. But OK, it’s football, and sometimes you lose. The test of character is whether you can shake it off and bounce back.

Super Bowl LXVI, baby — I still believe in the dream.




 

Category: Football

FMJRA 2.0: Thousand Dollar Car

Posted on | December 19, 2021 | Comments Off on FMJRA 2.0: Thousand Dollar Car

— compiled by Wombat-socho

It was a better week for the Senators, as they went on the road to Cincinnati and split two with the Reds and then went to Seattle and split two with the Pilots. Teddy Baseball is taking the weekend off to go fishing in Lake Washington, so things are quieter around the clubhouse.
Ceterum autem censeo Silicon Valley esse delendam.

Our manager in his happy place.

Rule 5 Sunday: Polyana Viana
Animal Magnetism
A View From The Beach
EBL
Proof Positive
Ninety Miles From Tyranny


Waking Up From Wokeness
357 Magnum
EBL

But They Told Me This ‘Elite Pedophile’ Stuff Was a Conspiracy Theory 
Bacon Time
357 Magnum
EBL

FMJRA 2.0: Sedan Delivery
A View From The Beach
EBL

A Blast From the Past
EBL

Mystery Surrounds Perpetrator of ‘Deplorable Acts of Anti-Black Hatred’ 
The Pirate’s Cove
EBL

In The Mailbox: 12.14.21 (Afternoon Edition)
357 Magnum
A View From The Beach
EBL
Proof Positive

In The Mailbox: 12.14.21 (Evening Edition)
357 Magnum
A View From The Beach
EBL
Proof Positive

In The Mailbox: 12.15.21
357 Magnum
A View From The Beach
EBL
Proof Positive

Speaker Pelosi Denounces ‘Outrageous Lawlessness’ of Her Own Constituents
357 Magnum
EBL

Never Text Your Ex
357 Magnum
EBL

In The Mailbox: 12.16.21
357 Magnum
A View From The Beach
EBL
Proof Positive

Killer Lesbians: British Couple Sentenced to Prison in Death of Toddler Daughter
EBL

Kick the Damned Field Goal! (Or, How ‘Analytics’ Is Ruining Football)
357 Magnum
EBL

In The Mailbox: 12.17.21
357 Magnum
A View From The Beach
EBL
Proof Positive

Top linkers for the week ending December 17:

  1.  EBL (15)
  2.  357 Magnum (10)
  3.  A View From The Beach (7)
  4.  Proof Positive (6)

Thanks to everyone for all the links!

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Category: FMJRA Award

Merry Christmas, Florida Man!

Posted on | December 18, 2021 | Comments Off on Merry Christmas, Florida Man!

Say hello to Florida resident Steven Stillwell. According to the Polk County Sheriff’s Office, the 42-year-old Stillwell “has an extensive criminal arrest history of 14 felonies, 5 misdemeanors, and 11 re-arrest charges . . . including: multiple burglaries and larcenies, DUI, multiple violations of probation, drug possession, possession of drug paraphernalia, possession of a weapon/ammunition by a convicted felon, dealing in stolen property, and fraud.” Stillwell’s lengthy criminal history nearly ended this week, thanks to an armed homeowner:

Detectives with the Polk County Sheriff’s Office responded to the shooting of a man who they said broke into a Lakeland home Tuesday afternoon.
The homeowner told deputies that the man, later identified as 42-year-old Steven Stillwell, forced his way into the residence by throwing a flower pot through a glass door at around 12:50 p.m., according to a news release.
Deputies said Stillwell was shot three times by the homeowner. Stillwell was later taken to a hospital where he was last reported in critical, stable condition, according to the release.
Detectives said they found a shotgun belonging to Stillwell in the backyard of the home, as well as video evidence showing Stillwell approaching the home through the backyard.
Polk County Sheriff Grady Judd said the evidence in the case indicated that Stillwell illegally entered the home, and that the homeowner did the right thing by shooting him.
“The castle doctrine is very clear in Florida law. A person’s home is his refuge,” Judd said in a statement. “The homeowner did exactly what he had a right to do. I commend him for protecting himself and defending his home.”

We presume that, if Stillwell survives his wounds, he will spend a long time in Florida’s prison system. Who says there’s no good news anymore? Merry Christmas!




 

Category: Crime, Florida

‘Shopping Cart Killer’ Caught, Police Say

Posted on | December 18, 2021 | Comments Off on ‘Shopping Cart Killer’ Caught, Police Say

He did “unspeakable things with his victims”:

Law enforcement in Fairfax, Virginia on Friday announced they have a suspected serial killer in custody, two days after officials discovered human remains in a container left in a wooded area.
The suspect was identified as Anthony Robinson, 35.
Authorities also named Cheyenne Brown, a 29-year-old Washington, D.C., woman who has been missing since September, as one of at least four of his victims.
“He’s killed four already, and we suspect that he has more victims. He’s a predator, as all serial killers are,” Fairfax County Police Chief Kevin Davis said during a news conference Friday, adding that the so-called “Shopping Cart Killer” does “unspeakable things with his victims.”
Fairfax homicide detectives on Wednesday discovered the shopping cart in a wooded area off of Route 1 near the Moon Inn. A container beside the shopping cart had two sets of human remains that were so “decomposed” that “it’s going to take a little time” for authorities to complete an autopsy, according to Fairfax Police Chief Kevin Davis.
Based on a preliminary analysis, officials were able to identify Brown. A second set of remains discovered in the container has yet to be identified. Authorities will conduct further testing, including a DNA analysis.
Brown’s family told WRC-TV, a local NBC affiliate, that she had a 7-year-old son and was pregnant at the time of her disappearance.
Robinson is also suspected of killing two women, ages 54 and 34, whose remains were discovered in Harrisonburg in November. Officials also discovered the other two victims’ remains in shopping carts, Davis said.
The alleged killer’s M.O. included meeting his victims online, luring them to motels, killing them and transporting their remains in shopping carts, according to Davis. . . .
Robinson allegedly met his victims, including Brown, on a dating website.
The two were in contact with each other on the night of Sept. 30 at a metro stop in D.C. before she went missing, according to O’Connell. Robinson may have contacts between New York and Harrisonburg, Virginia, if not elsewhere beyond those places.
The suspect is currently being held at Rockingham County Jail in Virginia.

How many times have I warned y’all about online dating? Swipe right, and next thing you know, a serial killer’s doing “unspeakable things” to you, then dumping your corpse in some remote location where your badly decomposed remains are found months later. All because you didn’t listen to me when I told you: Online dating is for losers.

And serial killers. But mainly just losers.




 

Category: Crime, Virginia

In The Mailbox: 12.17.21

Posted on | December 18, 2021 | Comments Off on In The Mailbox: 12.17.21

— compiled by Wombat-socho

Ceterum autem censeo Silicon Valley esse delendam.

Attila the Hun as Santa? Riding a sheep? Best not to think too hard about it.

OVER THE TRANSOM
357 Magnum: You Are NOT Protected By Your ZIP Code
EBL: Alan Rickman’s Performance In One Of The Greatest Christmas Movies Ever Made
Twitchy: James O’Keefe Drops Rachel Maddow On Her Head With TikTok Video, also, Ted Cruz Tells Eric Swalwell “Hush, Child”
Louder With Crowder: “He Shot Him A Lot”, also, Dude Drops Great Anti-Mandate Quote After Being Booted From Flight For Wearing Thong As Mask
Vox Popoli: Exemption Italian Style, No Racism In RPGs, and Off Limits
According To Hoyt: Karen & Brandon Got Married, also, Sailing Past The Script
Monster Hunter Nation: WriterDojo S1E17 – Grand Theft Story, also, Plushy Wendell Update
Stoic Observations: Disinformation &  Digital Democratic Practice
John C. Wright: Wright On Asimov On Orwell

RIPPED FROM THE HEADLINES
American Conservative: Realism & Restraint Put America First
American Greatness: The Kavanaugh War & The End Of Honor Culture, also, Justice Sotomayor Is The 21st Century’s Roger Taney
American Power: Afghan Women Lose Hope
American Thinker: What You Must Believe As An American In 2021
Animal Magnetism: Rule Five Populism Friday
Babalu Blog: Cuba’s Shameful Fidel Castro Center, North Korea Sets An Example For Cuba, also, Happy 83rd Birthday To Leo “Chico” Cardenas
BattleSwarm: LinkSwarm For December 17
Behind The Black: SpaceX Accused Of Sexual Harassment By Same Wokies Who Accused Blue Origin, Ingenuity Completes 18th Flight, and Perseverance Scientists – First Volcanics Then Ice In Jezero Crater
Cafe Hayek: Policy Should Not Be Based On “Extraordinary Extrapolations” By “Scientists” With A Terrible Track Record, also, On Minimum Wage Legislation
Da Tech Guy: My Suggested Anti-Racism Plan For Doctors To Get The Administration’s Extra Medicare Money
Don Surber: They Stole The Senate And Now They Say It Sucks, Biden Won’t Sell Texas The Wall He Isn’t Building, and Inflation Is Good For You, Peasant
First Street Journal: Another (Alleged) Killer Arrested In Lexington But The Herald-Leader Doesn’t Think You Need To Know What He Looks Like
Gates Of Vienna: Let’s Go Easy On The Taliban, Send The Vax Refuseniks To The GULAG!, and A Setback For The Imposition Of 2G In Lower Saxony
The Geller Report: Elon Musk Crushes Fauxcahontas – “I Will Pay More Taxes This Year Than Any American In History”, also, Biden Threatens A Winter Of Illness & Death To The Unjabbed
Hogewash: Team Kimberlin Post Of The Day, “New” Technologies, and The Shadow Knows
Hollywood In Toto: Why Netflix’s Defense Of Dave Chappelle Is A Game-Changer
The Lid: Did Shakespeare Anticipate The Biden Presidency?
Legal Insurrection: Fauxcahontas Pivots Back To Packing SCOTUS, Conservative Student Newspaper Being Relaunched At Harvard, and Biden’s Large Employer Jab Mandate Reinstated By 6th Circuit
Nebraska Energy Observer: Scattershot Friday?
Outkick: LOL, NYT Wants Pro Sports Leagues To Shut Down, Bama Football Back In Familiar Role As Favorite, and Miss America Gets Woke, Goes Broke
Power Line: The Left Vs. The Constitution, Thoughts From The Ammo Line, and The Post Is Looking For A Hit Man
Shark Tank: Sabatini Blames Sprowls & Simpson For Blocking E-Verify
Shot In The Dark: Imperialism – Back To The Future, A Thought Experiment, and Not As “Woke” As They Think
The Political Hat: Twelve Posts Of Christmas 2021 – Day Five
This Ain’t Hell: Valor Friday, also, A Little Leitmotif
Transterrestrial Musings: How Starship Changes Everything
Victory Girls: FDA Lifts Abortion Pill Restrictions – Can Now Be Prescribed Via Telehealth
Volokh Conspiracy: Sixth Circuit Dissolves Fifth Circuit’s Stay In OSHA Mandate Case
Weasel Zippers: Majority Of Americans Blame Biden For Inflation, House Dems Pass Bill Approving State Dept. Islamophobia Office, and 44 Days Since Last Press Conference – Biden Takes No Questions
The Federalist: Democrats Try To hide Worsening Congestion At California Ports, Pulitzer Center Helps 1619 Project Teachers Subvert Laws Banning Racism, and A Powerful Campaign Against Woke Capitalism Is Unfolding Quietly In State Treasurer Races
Mark Steyn: A Shropshire Mad, also, Under Cover Of Sir Roger

Amazon Warehouse Deals




Category: Linkagery

Kick the Damned Field Goal! (Or, How ‘Analytics’ Is Ruining Football)

Posted on | December 17, 2021 | Comments Off on Kick the Damned Field Goal! (Or, How ‘Analytics’ Is Ruining Football)

Trivia question: Who leads the NFL in scoring?

Indianapolis Colts running back Jonathan Taylor has more touchdowns (16 rushing, 2 receiving) than any other player in the league, for a total of 108 points, but he is not the NFL’s leading scorer. That distinction belongs to New England Patriots kicker Nick Folk, who has kicked 33 field goals and 29 extra points for a total of 128 points so far this season.

The reason I bring this up is because the Los Angeles Chargers passed up three field-goal opportunities Thursday night against the Kansas City Chiefs, opting instead to go for it on fourth down deep inside the Chiefs’ territory, and as a result lost 34-28 in overtime.

Blame “analytics,” which is what they call it nowadays when geeks with calculators apply statistical formulae to football. Supposedly, “analytics” shows that the odds of converting on fourth-and-2 or whatever favor going for it, regardless of the overall game situation, and I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve seen teams lose winnable games this season by following “analytics.” It’s become a plague on the sport, and I think my brother and I — who were watching the Chargers-Chiefs game because the outcome could affect the Patriots’ postseason chances — were not alone in yelling at the TV: “Kick the damned field goal!”

This brings me back to the subject of Nick Folk, who leads the league in scoring points, and is a major reason why the Patriots are 9-and-4 going into Saturday’s game against the Colts. Under Coach Bill Belichick, New England plays what they call “complementary football,” with all three phases of the game — offense, defense and special teams — working together to maximize the team’s chances of victory. This approach explains why the Patriots are near the top of the AFC in wins, despite the fact that their overall offense ranks only 10th in the conference in total yardage. New England win games by playing smart football in every phase of the game. Consider this, for example: Although their defense ranks 9th in the AFC in rushing yards allowed per game (114.5), New England is first in the entire NFL in terms of fewest points allowed by their defense (15.4). How can that be? It’s because Belichick’s approach to defense is “bend don’t break” (a phrase I first saw in a book by Bud Wilkinson back in the day). In other words, Belichick doesn’t panic when the other teams makes a couple of first downs, moving the ball up the field, but instead has his defense focus on not giving up the big plays, counting on the chance that the other team will eventually make a mistake. This is just old-fashioned common-sense football.

As demoralizing as it can be to a defense when the other team is driving the ball up field, good coaches teach the “bend-don’t break” attitude. Don’t worry if the other team is having success moving the ball, just focus on not giving up the big play, and when if they get down near your goal line, that’s OK, because the shorter field favors the defense (less territory to cover) and besides, mistakes happen. Fumbles, interceptions, sacks, penalties — all kinds of things can go wrong for a team on offense, and if the defense will just be patient, avoid mistakes of their own, and focus on each play as it happens, the “bend-don’t-break” defensive philosophy tends to win football games. So, yes, the New England Patriots give up a lot of yards, even while they allow fewer points per game than any other defense in the NFL: Points matter most.

And did I mention that the Patriots’ kicker leads the league in points?

By God, when the Patriots get to fourth down and they’re within field-goal range, you’ll never see Bill Belichick do that “analytics” nonsense. No, they kick the field goal, because that’s smart football.

Let me give you a couple of examples: On Oct. 10, the Patriots took a 1-3 record into a road game against the Houston Texans, one of the league’s doormats. If New England was to have any hope of a respectable season, this was a must-win game, but early in the third quarter, the Texans intercepted a pass, and two plays later Chris Conley threw a 37-yard touchdown pass to put Houston ahead 22-9. After a couple of three-and-out series by each team, the Texans got to fourth-and-2 at their own 36, and then screwed up a punt, which bounced off a player’s head and went out of bounds, giving the Patriots a first down at the Houston 36. Three plays netted only three yards, however, and New England settled for a field goal, cutting the margin to 22-12. On the next series, the Texans got a first down, but then got a holding call and had to punt again, and after a 13-yard return by Gunner Olszewski, New England started from their own 39. They drove all the way to the Houston 14 before stalling, and Folk came on to kick another field goal, to make it 22-15. Early in the fourth quarter, after Houston missed a field goal attempt, New England drove for a touchdown to tie the game 22-22 with 9:31 left to play. The Texans then went three-and-out, and the Patriots took over at their own 13 with 7:15 remaining. Nee England then mounted a 15-play, 84-yard drive that chewed up seven minutes on the clock until, faced with fourth-and-goal at the Houston 3-yard line with 15 seconds left, Nick Folk came on to kick the game-winning field goal.

New England 25, Houston 22 — and Folks’ four field goals made the difference. The second example: Three weeks after beating the Texans, New England had a 3-4 record as they traveled to L.A. to play the Chargers. A win would bring the Patriots to .500, but the Chargers came into the game with a 4-2 record, and New England was the underdog. While I won’t recap the game in detail, the Chargers took a 14-7 lead early in the second quarter, but Nick Folk kicked four field goals and the Patriots eventually won, 27-24. In those two crucial games, Nick Folk accounted for a combined 26 points, so don’t tell me that “settling” for a field goal is a bad choice: Kick the damned field goal.

You might think L.A. Chargers coach Brandon Staley would have learned something from getting beat that way by New England, but there he was with first-and-goal at the Kansas City 5 early in the game, and three incomplete passes later, it’s fourth down. Kick the field goal? No, he went for it, another incomplete pass, and the Chiefs took over. Kansas City went 95 yards in 11 plays, chewing up 5:53 on the clock before going ahead 7-0. The Chargers battled back, and were leading 14-10 when they recovered a Chiefs’ fumble with less than two minutes remaining in the first half. L.A. drove to the Kansas City 1-yard-line where, on fourth-and-goal, Staley passed up the chance to kick a field goal that would have put the Chargers ahead by 7. Instead, another pass went incomplete.

Kansas City took the second-half kickoff and drove down to the L.A. 14 before settling for a field goal that cut the Chargers’ lead to a single point, 14-13. On their next possession, the Chargers made it down to the Kansas City 28 where, on fourth-and-2, Staley again decided to go for it and failed. So that’s 9 points Staley rejected in a game where L.A. didn’t kick a single field goal and only punted once — it’s touchdowns or nothing, in Staley’s playbook, and that’s why they lost the game. Because “analytics.”

Believe it or not, Staley defended his decisions:

Chargers coach Brandon Staley isn’t changing his ways: He says he will continue to go for it on fourth down, even after three out of Los Angeles’ five attempts Thursday night failed in a 34-28 overtime defeat to the Kansas City Chiefs.
“I felt really comfortable with all those decisions,” Staley said after the loss, which dropped the Chargers two games behind the Chiefs in the AFC West standings with three to play. “That’s the way we’re going to play around here. That’s the way we’re going to play. When we have a quarterback like ours, and we have an offense like ours, that’s the way we’re going to play because that’s how you need to play against Kansas City, for sure. That’s how we’re going to become the team that we’re ultimately capable of being, by playing that way.”
The Chargers entered the game 13 for 21 on fourth downs this season, giving them the fourth-most conversions in the league. Their conversion percentage (61.9) was tied for eighth best in the NFL.
Two of Los Angeles’ failed attempts to convert came inside the Kansas City 5, and another was on the edge of field goal range. The Chargers became the first team to fail twice on fourth-and-goal in a first half since the 1984 Chargers did the same — also against the Chiefs — 37 years ago to the day (Dec. 16, 1984).

You lost a game you could have won, and yet you’re still doubling down? Get back to me in a few weeks, when you’re sitting at home watching the playoffs on TV, loser. After Thursday’s defeat, the Chargers are 15-of-26 (57.7%) on fourth-down conversion attempts, ranked 8th in the AFC in that category — where New England ranks 4th in the AFC. But you see, the Patriots have only gone for it 8 times on fourth down, converting five (62.5%). No team in the AFC has tried fewer fourth-down conversions than New England. And unlike Brandon Staley, Bill Belichick has his team poised to win their division and make the playoffs.

Oh, I almost forgot: Guess who leads the NFL in field goals attempted (36) and field goals made (33)? That would be the New England Patriots.

Of course, there’s no telling how the Patriots will do in their final four regular-season games — Saturday night’s game at Indianapolis will probably be a tough one, because the Colts (7-6) have home-field advantage and are fighting to keep their playoff hopes alive. But I guarantee you this: New England won’t lose because of “analytics.”

Bill Belichick is not stupid.




 

Category: Football
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