The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

Good News, Bad News

Posted on | January 11, 2010 | 14 Comments

Guy goes to see a psychiatrist and says, “Doctor, you’ve got to help me. I think I’m losing my mind. I’m consumed with jealous rage. I’ve got this insane paranoid fear that my wife is cheating on me.”

Doctor says, “Well, the good news is, you’re not crazy . . .”

Which is to say, mental illness is a matter of perspective. On the one hand, you may be suffering from clinical depression. However, depression is not a mental disorder if your life actually sucks. So it’s good news either way:

  • You’re depressed, which means your bleak outlook is irrational and things are actually better than you think; or
  • Your life sucks, in which case, at least you’re not crazy.

After flying back from California — sunshine, palm trees, Crimson Tide victory — I returned Sunday morning to Maryland, where it’s cold and gray and the tip jar balance is currently 19 cents. So as I irritably grumbled at my kids this afternoon, the thought occurred to me, “Is this some sort of seasonal mood disorder? Or are things actually as bad as they seem to me at this very moment?”

And a happy thought occurred to me: If my life does, in fact, suck, that’s proof that at least I’m not crazy.

Good news! Also, the online money bomb fundraising drive for Massachusetts Senate Republican candidate Scott Brown is reportedly a huge success and is now nearing its goal of $500,000. So go give to the Brown campaign. That will cheer me up because a Brown victory could help stop ObamaCare.

On the other hand, if you’re feeling completely hopeless about the political process, hit my tip jar for $20, so I can go to Massachusetts and cover the inevitable GOP defeat that proves you’re not crazy.

It’s a win-win, see? Once you get the right attitude, there’s really no such thing as bad news. And, BTW, about your wife . . .

Category: Election, humor, Massachusetts, Politics, Senate

Comments

14 Responses to “Good News, Bad News”

  1. Patrick
    January 11th, 2010 @ 11:35 pm

    heh!

  2. Patrick
    January 11th, 2010 @ 6:35 pm

    heh!

  3. Ad rem
    January 12th, 2010 @ 12:24 am

    I’m in Irvine….right next to Costa Mesa. It’s 72 and sunny. Wish you were here!

  4. Ad rem
    January 11th, 2010 @ 7:24 pm

    I’m in Irvine….right next to Costa Mesa. It’s 72 and sunny. Wish you were here!

  5. Joe
    January 12th, 2010 @ 12:35 am

    Cheer up.

  6. Joe
    January 11th, 2010 @ 7:35 pm

    Cheer up.

  7. Nancy
    January 12th, 2010 @ 2:06 am

    It’s okay, Prof Jacobson at Legal insurrection is covering this one, and he seems to be doing quite well. Let him have some fun, too. Spend some time with your family.

  8. Nancy
    January 11th, 2010 @ 9:06 pm

    It’s okay, Prof Jacobson at Legal insurrection is covering this one, and he seems to be doing quite well. Let him have some fun, too. Spend some time with your family.

  9. Joe
    January 12th, 2010 @ 2:57 am

    Cheer Up II.

    Cheer Up III.

  10. Joe
    January 11th, 2010 @ 9:57 pm

    Cheer Up II.

    Cheer Up III.

  11. Thrasymachus
    January 12th, 2010 @ 3:34 am

    California should have gone off the cliff a while back, but a short visit reminds me why not. It’s not just the weather and the physical beauty either; it had decades of good governance that it is coasting on now.

    Help pay for your vacation, McCain? No dice. I *already* know the Republicans are hosed.

    Strangely enough I was eating in a bar in Orlando during the end of the Alabama-Florida SEC championship. I was surprised there were so many Alabama fans there. Tim Tebow looked like he was going to cry at the end.

  12. Thrasymachus
    January 11th, 2010 @ 10:34 pm

    California should have gone off the cliff a while back, but a short visit reminds me why not. It’s not just the weather and the physical beauty either; it had decades of good governance that it is coasting on now.

    Help pay for your vacation, McCain? No dice. I *already* know the Republicans are hosed.

    Strangely enough I was eating in a bar in Orlando during the end of the Alabama-Florida SEC championship. I was surprised there were so many Alabama fans there. Tim Tebow looked like he was going to cry at the end.

  13. proof
    January 12th, 2010 @ 3:47 am

    Scott Brown and Co. had to revise their goal upwards twice. They’ve already passed a million bucks and counting.

  14. proof
    January 11th, 2010 @ 10:47 pm

    Scott Brown and Co. had to revise their goal upwards twice. They’ve already passed a million bucks and counting.