LOL! @NealRauhauser’s Demand to @Twitter: ‘No More Fun of Any Kind!’ UPDATE: Neal Deletes His Plan (Lulz)

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What a buzzkill this guy is, huh? So there I was, having stirred up a hornet’s nest with my “atheist sex scandal” post. My quarrel with a young renegade Baptist named Sarah Jones had just reached the point where the whole “neo-Confederate” thing came up and — boom! — somebody sends me a link to a Pastebin document in which Neal Rauhauser outlines his plan to ban all his enemies from Twitter:

Step 1. Don’t tweet much for over a year
Step 2. Build enormous Twitter Recording Machine, capture 2.8 million tweets
Step 3. Apply analytics using Maltego, Gephi, SplunkStorm, and JGAAP, nowhere to hide
Step 4. Build tweet to screen shot system, capture images of over 9,000 keyword hits.
Step 5. Wait patiently for long rumored Twitter rule change:

https://support.twitter.com/articles/18311-the-twitter-rules

Targeted Abuse: You may not engage in targeted abuse or harassment. Some of the factors that we take into account when determining what conduct is considered to be targeted abuse or harassment are:
* if you are sending messages to a user from multiple accounts;
* if the sole purpose of your account is to send abusive messages to others;
* if the reported behavior is one-sided or includes threats

Step 6. Publicly identify just some of the lucky permaban sweepstakes finalists

Then the list, which begins with Aaron Walker and Ali Akbar and continues on to include EVERYBODY NEAL RAUHAUSER HATES, among them Patterico, John Hoge, Mandy Nagy, and of course, me, followed by the completed plan:

Step 7. Provide a sample of 5,200 file names, watch the frantic deletion begin.
Step 8. Wait for dawning realization that deletion doesn’t matter when there is a long evidence trail.
Step 9. Record all the panic. Because lulz.

“Panic,” Neal? “Lulz”? Coming as it does from the notorious perpetrator of TwitterGate, and considering that several of the accounts you list have thousands of followers, compared to the 11 people currently following @NealRauhauser, I’m guessing that maybe the folks at Twitter won’t need much help figuring out who is the prime candidate for the “lucky permanban sweepstakes.”

Now, you gentlemen will excuse me, but there’s a young renegade Baptist — a regular spitfire — who simply demands to know my opinions on 19th century history. It’s so hard being me.

UPDATE: I’m told that the Pastebin of Rauhauser’s Sooper Sekrit Plan to Ban From Twitter EVERYBODY NEAL HATES has now been deleted, which is something you learn to expect. The dude has deleted more Internet content than most people create in a lifetime.

Notice how Neal expected that, by “publicly identifying” his enemies (as if we didn’t already know Neal hates us) he would inspire “frantic deletion” and “panic.” Instead, within an hour or so of my calling attention to his list of “lucky permaban sweepstakes finalists,” it was Neal who did the panicking and “frantic deletion.”

“Because lulz,” indeed.

Oh, also, Neal’s now up to 12 Twitter followers.

 

90 comments

  2. Build enormous Twitter recording machine, eh? Is he going to steal the moon, too? What a colossal waste of time. He should just ask the NSA to borrow theirs. They seem to be lending it to everybody these days.

  6. I will get you banned from the internet unless you forward the sum of One Meeellion Dollars to my account! Isn’t that right Mr. Bigglesworth!

  7. He must be seriously butthurt in order to go to these lengths. Or was he behind the account that harassed that UK reporter to the point where Twitter changed its reporting system?

  14. That category holds only Mr. Hoge, presently. I remain faintly horrified and stand aghast atthe sheer virulence of your trolls.

  16. First I was jealous of Mr. Hoge, then of you. I can’t seen to attract the quality of troll that the both of you do. PICKLESTICKES!!!!!11
    !

  20. You provide a tremendous public service, Stacy. The rest of us gets to see the insanity of these trolls without the hassle of being harassed by them. It’s kind of like seeing horrible accidents at NASCAR without having to be in them.

  21. Came for the crazy, stayed for the irony.

    Neal’s folks straight up posted a picture of my house and seemingly tried to get a fatwa against Aaron. They demanded photos of Patterico’s spouse while threatening the couple with violence and vulgar actions. They joked about Greg Howard’s children in a way too nasty to repeat. All the while Neal is the ringleader and usually the worst culprit. And if you call him out for being the thug he is… finally that’s harassment. Poor Neal was criticized for his actual awful behavior.

    I tried to read this pastebin thing when I got home from work but it said “this paste has been removed”. I just can’t ever seem to keep up with these yo-yos.

    Neal’s problem has always been his need to compensate by explaining how awesome his plans are. He lays it all out, usually trying to seem as sinister as possible (at one point he had maps to Aaron’s neighborhood, videos of stabbings and shootings, and a huge countdown clock). Then he always denies being involved with his own plans. For example, if twitter does ban a few of his critics, Neal will pretend it’s crazy to ask him if he’s responsible.

  22. I detected evidence of #2 being done and possibly even something more nefarious. At the time (several months ago) I wrote to Patterico directly but I guess he wasn’t interested. I won’t go into what I think I detected here other than to say it could have been used as a targeted DoS machine against a configurable set of twitter users or possibly even twitter itself.

    Here is what I would suggest people do:

    1. If you get a new follower who doesn’t seem to tweet much, you might want to consider blocking them. Take a look at their follows and their tweets. Maybe google one or more of their tweets and see if someone else tweeted exactly the same thing or something very close to the same thing. In fact, google a few of their tweets.

    2. Occasionally go through some of your follows. Look for any activity profile that might appear odd or suspicious (no tweets in two years or only inane tweets that seem to make no sense or maybe tweets that you remember someone you are following having made that seem repeated by this follow as it they tweeted it yourself or even seeing them tweet YOUR tweets but not as “re-tweets”, as if they themselves tweeted them) and block them.

    The twitter API is fairly easily scripted and it is a rather simple matter to create a persona that follows people and simply records every tweet made to disk. Subsequent deletion or protecting of the account would be no help as the tweets would still be saved to disk.

  24. You describe the pattern pretty well. The guy is 31 flavors of paranoid, and yet he projects that onto others — we are so unnecessarily suspicion, you see — in the same way that he repeatedly publishes conspiracy theory treatises claiming that there is this awful RWNJ plot against him, even while he constantly conspires against RWNJs.

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