Sorry, guys, that “Lindsay Goes to Prison” cable-TV series is still just part of your sick imagination:
Lindsay Lohan got a tongue-lashing Thursday from an L.A. County judge after the actress failed to appear in court for a hearing, instead remaining in France at the Cannes Film Festival.
While dozens of reporters and camera crews converged on the Beverly Hills courthouse, Lohan was in France after a week of red-carpet premieres and yacht parties, her moves captured by the paparazzi.
The actress was scheduled for a mandatory court appearance in Los Angeles County Superior Court so a judge could review the status of her probation from a 2007 conviction for driving under the influence.
When Lohan didn’t show up, a clearly frustrated Judge Marsha N. Revel issued an arrest warrant for the 23-year-old performer. . . .
After the hearing, it appeared likely either that authorities would arrest Lohan when she arrived in Los Angeles or that her attorney would immediately have the actress surrender to a law enforcement agency. But Thursday afternoon, officials announced that Lohan’s attorney had posted 10% of her $100,000 bail and that the arrest warrant had been recalled. . . .
So ex-lesbian Lindsay won’t be starring in the orange-jumpsuit-and-handcuffs MTV melodrama, “Celebrity Babe Lockdown,” anytime soon — except in your twisted pathetic dreams.
In other sleazy, superficial, sensationalist celebrity news:
- A Florida hooker named “Tiffany” tells the National Enquirer that she hooked up with comedian George Lopez, who requested threesomes. Eliot Spitzer could not be reached for comment.
- Madonna, 51, went night-clubbing in London. No word on whether the cougar captured any prey.
- Britney Spears reportedly had another emotional breakdown, this time at Disney World. Apparently, she was upset to discover that nobody was standing in line to ride her.
- There is reportedly another sex video of Kendra, the ex-Playmate and “Girls Next Door” star. Hugh Hefner is shocked — shocked! — that a girl who showed it all in his magazine would be caught doing amateur porn.
- Is Tiger Woods dating again? Skanky cocktail waitresses around the world certainly hope so.
- Miss USA Rima Fakih is said to be dating Perez Hilton‘s ex-boyfriend and his herpes lesions. (OK, I made up that thing about herpes, but what are the odds with a guy like that, huh?)
- On ABC’s “Nightline,” Jesse James got very emotional about wrecking his marriage to Sandra Bullock and picking up a nasty herpes infection. (Like I said, what are the odds?)
Celebrity gossip via WeSmirch; sleazy snark via my own twisted pathetic imagination.
Tongue lashing! Very titillating!
RG
Tongue lashing! Very titillating!
RG
My you really are peddling the smut today!
My you really are peddling the smut today!
Turn on Entertainment Tonight or pick up People magazine, and you’ll get the same slimy news, sponsored by advertisements from major American corporations. If people want this stuff — and evidently they do — why should we let the MSM have a monopoly on it?
At least I’m warning of the herpes risk of skank-chasing.
Turn on Entertainment Tonight or pick up People magazine, and you’ll get the same slimy news, sponsored by advertisements from major American corporations. If people want this stuff — and evidently they do — why should we let the MSM have a monopoly on it?
At least I’m warning of the herpes risk of skank-chasing.
I have been busy giving out fatwas and denoucements all day over these jokers drawing the Prophet Mohammed (P.B.U.H.), but then I came across these crazy Lindsay Lohan posts. No, No, No.
You just earned yourself a fatwa.
Go back to posting about Alyssa Milano. I follow her twitter posts. She is just delightful. I would love to add her to my lists of wives, Insh’allah.
I have been busy giving out fatwas and denoucements all day over these jokers drawing the Prophet Mohammed (P.B.U.H.), but then I came across these crazy Lindsay Lohan posts. No, No, No.
You just earned yourself a fatwa.
Go back to posting about Alyssa Milano. I follow her twitter posts. She is just delightful. I would love to add her to my lists of wives, Insh’allah.
Tweet.
Tweet.
You mean to tell me that the woman who shared Hef (as if the old geezer isn’t bad enough) with two other women made a lesbian sex tape?
Shocker of shockers..
You mean to tell me that the woman who shared Hef (as if the old geezer isn’t bad enough) with two other women made a lesbian sex tape?
Shocker of shockers..
[…] http://theothermccain.com/2010/05/21/celebrity-news-update-lindsay-lohans-large-breasts-make-bail-sk…So ex-lesbian Lindsay won’t be starring in the orange-jumpsuit-and-handcuffs MTV melodrama, “Celebrity Babe Lockdown,” anytime soon — except in your twisted pathetic dreams. In other sleazy, superficial, sensationalist celebrity news: … […]
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