The Other McCain

"One should either write ruthlessly what one believes to be the truth, or else shut up." — Arthur Koestler

Curb Your Vice President

Posted on | June 15, 2010 | 20 Comments

Global warming is a crisis, but evidently not such a huge crisis that a guy can’t take a few minutes to screw around:

Al Gore’s split from wife Tipper after 40 years of marriage was a shock to everyone who thought theirs was the ideal marriage. . . .

(Who is this “everyone” who thought that?)

[T]he former Vice President was having an affair with Larry David’s ex-wife — for the past two years!
Al and Tipper’s breakup didn’t come as much of a surprise to one Hollywood player — Laurie David. Star has learned that Al has been having an affair with Laurie, who divorced Seinfeld creator and Curb Your Enthusiasm star Larry David in 2007 amidst reports she was cheating with the caretaker of their Martha’s Vineyard summer home. . . .

(Ever the Beta male, Al was getting the domestic help’s sloppy seconds.)

“Al and Laurie went from friends to lovers,” an insider tells Star. “It couldn’t be avoided.”

“It couldn’t be avoided” — like there was a irresistible gravitation pull. This was a situation was beyond anyone’s control. Al was a victim of quantum physics. Dan Riehl twists the knife:

Funny that she would dump the guy caring for her garden, for the guy who tends the world’s garden! She moved on to bigger things, I guess.

“Bigger things” — we presume this refers to Al’s waistline.

UPDATE: Laurie David denies that Al made her climate change. No comment on doing the caretaker.

UPDATE II: As a sommenter noted, Ace of Spades had this item five hours before I did, and the AOSHQ crew hammered it in the comments like the caretaker doing Laurie David.

Comments

20 Responses to “Curb Your Vice President”

  1. rain of lead
    June 15th, 2010 @ 11:48 pm

    what would Big Al’s pick-up line sound like

    “hey laurie, I got three words for ya,
    Man. Bear. Pig!”

    or

    “wanna see my hockey stick?”

    heh. the morons at ace’s place got 500 comments out of that thread

  2. rain of lead
    June 15th, 2010 @ 7:48 pm

    what would Big Al’s pick-up line sound like

    “hey laurie, I got three words for ya,
    Man. Bear. Pig!”

    or

    “wanna see my hockey stick?”

    heh. the morons at ace’s place got 500 comments out of that thread

  3. Al Gore
    June 16th, 2010 @ 12:04 am

    Look what Tipper made me do?

    Can you really blame me?

    Here is a picture of one of my lovers. We are involved in a threesome, with the planet.

  4. Al Gore
    June 15th, 2010 @ 8:04 pm

    Look what Tipper made me do?

    Can you really blame me?

    Here is a picture of one of my lovers. We are involved in a threesome, with the planet.

  5. Al Gore
    June 16th, 2010 @ 12:13 am

    Many make the mistake that this is Larry David’s ex wife. No, no, no. That is Cheryl Hines, who is an actress on Curb Your Enthusiasm. Cheryl Hines is nothing like Laurie David.

    You may not know this but the character Susie Greene in Curb Your Enthusiasm was based on my lover, Laurie David.

  6. Al Gore
    June 15th, 2010 @ 8:13 pm

    Many make the mistake that this is Larry David’s ex wife. No, no, no. That is Cheryl Hines, who is an actress on Curb Your Enthusiasm. Cheryl Hines is nothing like Laurie David.

    You may not know this but the character Susie Greene in Curb Your Enthusiasm was based on my lover, Laurie David.

  7. Paco
    June 16th, 2010 @ 12:19 am

    “It couldn’t be avoided” — like there was a irresistible gravitation pull.

    Hey, it’s possible. Have you seen how big around this guy’s getting lately?

  8. Al Gore
    June 16th, 2010 @ 12:19 am

    Actually you can see both my lovers in the picture above. I love you both so much.

  9. Paco
    June 15th, 2010 @ 8:19 pm

    “It couldn’t be avoided” — like there was a irresistible gravitation pull.

    Hey, it’s possible. Have you seen how big around this guy’s getting lately?

  10. Al Gore
    June 15th, 2010 @ 8:19 pm

    Actually you can see both my lovers in the picture above. I love you both so much.

  11. FenelonSpoke
    June 16th, 2010 @ 1:03 am

    The folks at “I Own The World” should have an Al Gore pick up line contest. I vote for Rain of Lead’s contribution, “Want to see my hockey stick”. I also like, “I’ll gladly plug your hole”, or for the girlfriend, “How about carbon up to see my sometime?”

  12. FenelonSpoke
    June 15th, 2010 @ 9:03 pm

    The folks at “I Own The World” should have an Al Gore pick up line contest. I vote for Rain of Lead’s contribution, “Want to see my hockey stick”. I also like, “I’ll gladly plug your hole”, or for the girlfriend, “How about carbon up to see my sometime?”

  13. jefferson101
    June 16th, 2010 @ 1:06 am

    Dadgumit! You had me scared for a minute with the headline. I thought that Joe Biden had acted like a normal human being or something.

    Heh.

  14. jefferson101
    June 15th, 2010 @ 9:06 pm

    Dadgumit! You had me scared for a minute with the headline. I thought that Joe Biden had acted like a normal human being or something.

    Heh.

  15. Estragon
    June 16th, 2010 @ 3:38 am

    Frankly, I expect that Laurie David will do a lot of truly disgusting things that Tipper Gore would refuse to do.

    Now we can add sleeping with Al to that list.

  16. Estragon
    June 15th, 2010 @ 11:38 pm

    Frankly, I expect that Laurie David will do a lot of truly disgusting things that Tipper Gore would refuse to do.

    Now we can add sleeping with Al to that list.

  17. Al Gore
    June 16th, 2010 @ 12:35 am

    You have no idea Estragon.

    Although, when I watched Barack Obama tonight, I have to admit I felt a stirring. I think it may be time to invite the President over for a glass of wine with Laurie, Gaia, and myself and see where the evening takes us…

  18. Al Gore
    June 16th, 2010 @ 4:35 am

    You have no idea Estragon.

    Although, when I watched Barack Obama tonight, I have to admit I felt a stirring. I think it may be time to invite the President over for a glass of wine with Laurie, Gaia, and myself and see where the evening takes us…

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