Category: humor

by Smitty

With your approval, then: pic.twitter.com/Jv6In9m8v7

— IGotOverMachoGrande (@smitty_one_each) July 16, 2017

by Smitty

Those who’ve been on the net for a while may remember Herbert Kornfeld, tragically felled by a politically correct scythe right around the time Barack Obama rose from useless to famously useless, back in 2007.

Apparently, the Northern Lightbulb is a little less dim for having been pilloried by pretty much the entire Western Hemisphere, modulo Cuba.

Lambasting this knob has been the most fun I’ve had on Twitter in too long. Here are a few more eulogies:

Some cranky Americans never quite grasped his sense of humor, but Admial Yamamoto really could throw a surprise party.
#TrudeauEulogies

— IGotOverMachoGrande (@smitty_one_each) November 28, 2016

Possessed of deep inquisitiveness, Tomás de Torquemada followed the facts with pliers & a blow torch where no one expected. #TrudeauEulogies

— IGotOverMachoGrande (@smitty_one_each) November 28, 2016

So far ahead of his time that he could only just recently lead a Boy Scout Troop, the Marquis de Sade brought joy to all. #TrudeauEulogies

— IGotOverMachoGrande (@smitty_one_each) November 28, 2016

An advocate for non-traditional families & robust immigration policy, William the Conqueror thwarted Anglo-Saxon Privilege. #trudeaueulogies

— IGotOverMachoGrande (@smitty_one_each) November 28, 2016

by Smitty

Hasn’t been worth the last eight years, but Biden has been great comic relief.

BIDEN THOUGHT BUBBLE: "I coulda been a contenda. This bimbo doesn't even know that, when you wipe a server, you use a Shamwow." https://t.co/OhYMA9YDOw

— IGotOverMachoGrande (@smitty_one_each) November 12, 2016

Well Joe, your advice really stank. pic.twitter.com/6AikvRj9hx

— Scott (@retiredfirecapt) November 12, 2016

"Joe, for the 437th time, the bust on the table is MLK, *not* Mike Tyson.
And no, you Mike & Trump are not meeting behind any schoolhouse." https://t.co/DSRmeRHPT7

— IGotOverMachoGrande (@smitty_one_each) November 12, 2016

Biden: I'm not giving them the wifi password

Obama: Joe…

Biden: I said what I said pic.twitter.com/l17SaIeQke

— JAY (@pieceofjay) November 11, 2016

by Smitty

Regret that my 2016 Election Primal Scream Therapy has curtailed my blogging to the point of non-existence. Keep in mind that it’s all fun and games until junk gets real, states secede and armies march.

I know where we're headed
And our future's fully threaded
And we'll likely soon eat Venezuelan food (1/2) https://t.co/ucp302By7t

— IGotOverMachoGrande (@smitty_one_each) August 6, 2016

They say that if you're heeding fools
That soon eneough the old mob rules
Against the wall we find us fully screwed https://t.co/ucp302jXfV

— IGotOverMachoGrande (@smitty_one_each) August 6, 2016

by Smitty

It started as a biographical not concerning Her Majesty:

So, she was underage as a Goldwater groupie? #WhichHillary https://t.co/d0GSxs3ZaY

— i am so grounded (@BrewStudNo1) April 3, 2016

As somebody who nurses dreams of writing fiction some day, and is fascinated by criminal psychology in general, I had to inquire:

@BrewStudNo1 I am interested in precisely how the Godless Commies got her. @AP_Politics

— IGotOverMachoGrande (@smitty_one_each) April 3, 2016

The lesson began when, as a Lefty will, Punky had to go all potty mouth:

@smitty_one_each @AP_Politics your cowardly ass is what’s wrong with America

— i am so grounded (@BrewStudNo1) April 3, 2016

Now, I do have 4 1/2 years of sea time in the Navy. But you become jaded about the potty mouth. It’s more interesting to work with the situation and see where it can go. Ah, yes: an #OccupyResoluteDesk gag:

@BrewStudNo1 Yeah, but he won re-election in 2012, so deal with it. @AP_Politics

— IGotOverMachoGrande (@smitty_one_each) April 3, 2016

At this point, Punky’s boorishness (one wonders if he doubles as a Trump supporter) comes to the fore, and he gets all Flukie-Dukey on me:

@smitty_one_each @AP_Politics what? None of you ‘conservative’ illiterates ever make any sense

— i am so grounded (@BrewStudNo1) April 3, 2016

Here I decided to hold training and violate the “explain nothing” rule:

@BrewStudNo1 Regret that you’re too simple to grasp that I was equating the phrase “your cowardly ass” in your tweet with BHO.

— IGotOverMachoGrande (@smitty_one_each) April 3, 2016

Sure, I love well-done malapropism as much as the next guy, but using “incongruent” here sounds like somebody who’s only qualified through two-syllable words reaching for a four-banger and grabbing the ronngg one. Possibly there is some humor in here and I’m just missing it.

@smitty_one_each your sense of humor is incongruent, but comedic ability never was in abundance on your end of the political spectrum

— i am so grounded (@BrewStudNo1) April 3, 2016

Past that tweet, @BrewStudNo1 wallowed in his taste for banal, NTTAWWT. I would like to publicly forgive him all the insults. Our political discourse is too rife these days with people getting all spun up and emotional. Request everyone who reads this post that has a Twitter account swing by and offer @BrewStudNo1 a sincere virtual hug. Together we can get through these trying times, mate.

by Smitty

A little love for Her Majesty, the Red Queen of Chappaqua:

Teddy Roosevelt's "Great White Fleet" was an attempt to internationalize GOPe raaaaacism. #HistoryByHillary

— IGotOverMachoGrande (@smitty_one_each) March 12, 2016

Germans dubbed Marines "Truffelhunden" at Belleau Wood because those dogs would rather dig for mushrooms than let me in! #HistoryByHillary

— IGotOverMachoGrande (@smitty_one_each) March 12, 2016

Who says Bill's the bad guy? Everyone knows Al Gore invented the Intern Net. #HistoryByHillary

— IGotOverMachoGrande (@smitty_one_each) March 12, 2016