Category: Three Beers Later

Iowa Victory Lap

Posted on Comments

DES MOINES, Iowa
Today I checked out of the hotel near Santorum HQ in Johnston and drove down toward the Des Moines International Airport where I checked into a cheap motel. Then I went to Taco John’s and got four tacos, a burrito, chips and salsa. On the way back to the motel, I stopped into a convenience store and got a 40-ounce Budweiser. Dropped that off at the motel, then drove over to the airport and returned the Mustang.

God, I’m gonna miss that car.

And I’m gonna miss Iowa, too. All the pundits who badmouth the Iowa caucuses have no idea how much fun it is to take a 40-mph curve doing 80 in a Mustang, while running late for a candidate event in some small town out on the prairie. I don’t know what these pundits do for amusement, but they’ve never done anything as fun as making that run from Montezuma to Pella in a sweet black Ford Mustang convertible.

(Aside: Do they have car rental agencies in Vanuatu? And do those agencies have any Mustang convertibles on the lot? What’s the daily rate? Someone should investigate this.)

On my way to the airport, I called Richard McEnroe of Three Beers Later to thank him for the linkage. And after returning the Mustang to the rental agency, I called Jimmie Bise of the Sundries Shack because I needed a shoulder to cry on. Continue reading Iowa Victory Lap →

I DENOUNCE THIS ATROCITY!

Posted on Comments

I’m not sure which is more profoundly offensive: The song itself, or Richard McEnroe posting it under the title, “A Ron Paul Christmas”:

There are so many layers of sick humor atrociously bad taste hate crime involved, I’m not sure where to begin:

  • Orthodox Jews will be horrified by this shiksa‘s expression of carnal lust for Jew-flesh;
  • Ron Paul supporters will be insulted by the suggestion that a politician hates Jews merely because he has been known to rant about the  “Israel lobby” (nudge, nudge, wink, wink); and
  • Islamic fanatics will be infuriated by this taunting reminder their relentlesss efforts to annihilate every Jew on the planet have failed.

These are just three of the most obvious human rights violations involved and therefore:

I DENOUNCE RICHARD McENROE

Because, hey, being denounced by me? It’s like the Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval with the ADL, SPLC, Media Matters, etc.

Mandatory Binding Arbitration

Posted on Comments

That’s the only possible solution to the ongoing labor dispute at Three Beers Later, where Richard McEnroe was forced to cross his own picket line, established in solidarity with the unpaid HuffPo bloggers.

My worst fear is that Richard’s militant labor unrest against himself will inspire Smitty and Wombat to begin demanding a 10% increase of their pay and even though 10% of nothing isn’t all that much, I must refuse their demand on principle.

Because this is a greedy capitalist blog. When I finally figure out a way to fully monetize the value of our traffic, I’ll cut my co-bloggers a check before I jet off to my private Caribbean island. In the meantime, the floggings will increase until morale improves.

So you see why I’ll be keeping a close eye on the continuing crisis at Three Beers Later, where rumor has it that their management may be bringing in scabs.