How Early Is Too Early To Warn Your Son About Those Girls? The Third Trimester?

by Smitty

National Offend A Feminist Week is the time that we celebrate all things good, lasting, and traditional, at the expense of the occasional harpy. This year’s celebration finds me especially exultant, as I have convinced my wife that my heritage is worth preserving in the human gene pool, in that most pre-historic, patriarchal and pre-Critical Theory sort of way: parenthood.
You can theorize, but you never know until faced with the reality of new life, just how daunting the challenges can be. For example, Nicholas Dietrich Smith (current working name for the lad, Lord willing he be born hale) could be faced with little girls toting guns instead of jump ropes:

can you believe this noise?
Because nothing says 'Trying to improve the situation' like giving a pump-action shotgun to a little girl.

Continue reading How Early Is Too Early To Warn Your Son About Those Girls? The Third Trimester? →

How Smitty Killed Osama bin Laden

By now, you’ve seen the headlines at Memeorandum:

Osama bin Laden Killed by U.S. Strike

Bin Laden Is Dead, Obama Says 

Sources: Al-Qaida head bin Laden dead 

BREAKING: BIN LADEN DEAD

Osama Bin Ladin Loses Popularity
and 30cc of Brain and Skull But
Mostly 30cc of Brain and Skull

Everyone was suspicious last year when Admiral Smith got his orders to deploy to Afghanistan. Why was this middle-aged naval reserve officer from Virginia being sent halfway around the world?

The cover story that he would be providing IT services for troops based in Kandahar and Bagram was plausible.

But of course, it would be. Nudge, nudge.

However, those of us who know Smitty to be a natural-born killer were deeply suspicious. Continue reading How Smitty Killed Osama bin Laden →

Obligatory Osama Post

by Smitty

Expressed in image form, I’m weighing in somewhere around here:
One suspects that this is The Real Deal. The political cost of Type II error, which would come in the form of a valid “Neener, neener, neener” tape from bin Laden, would be in the catastrophic range.
This is good news, obviously. Let us rejoice for the Commander in Chief. Bad onya to any conservatives who refuse to take a break from the Politics In Everything stance and give a little hurrah for the POTUS. Or at least be gracious like Gov. Sarah Palin. If he gets the blame for all that goes wrong, it’s unjust to deny him credit when something goes right. Oh, and a giant thumbs up to those bad mike foxtrots that conducted the operation, whatever form it took.
Osama is strategically significant. He hasn’t mattered much tactically since Tora Bora. His demise may open up a few more policy options for the administration. Denying him a 9/11 10th Anniversary gloat also falls in the ‘kinda nice’ category. Closure for the victims of 9/11 is great thing.
I sincerely hope that the Administration is deft in building upon this to improve the situation in Afghanistan, Pakistan, and the broader region. Heaven knows a little letup is long overdue.
Again, props to the POTUS!
Actual news coverage available at Hot Air.
W’s reaction here.
And check Great Satan’s Girlfriend.
A word of caution: anyone who thinks this means the whole struggle is over is self-identifying as a rube.

LIVE AT FIVE – 05.02.11

TOP NEWS
Osama Bin Laden Is Dead, Says Obama

Osama Bin Laden - loser

Killed by US forces in mansion outside Islamabad, Pakistan

Administration Officials Tour Alabama Storm Damage
Quick response vowed


Poland Thrilled By Beatification Of “Our Pope”
Millions watch the Mass live on TV



POLITICS
Struggle Looms On Controlling Federal Spending

Will the "Gang Of Six" come up with a suitable compromise?

Apparently “not spending money we don’t have” is a horribly complicated concept for some Congresscritters

Judge’s Revelation Prompts Challenge To  Prop 8 Ruling

Unions In Familiar Fight With New Foe

Marco Rubio: Medicare Has To Change

“Massive” Immigration Protest In San Jose
Apparently 2000 is “massive” these days



THE ECONOMY, STUPID
Buffett Says Sokol Affair Won’t Tarnish 80-Year Record
Southwest Airlines Closes AirTran Deal Today
Silver Tumbles In Asian Trading After Six-Week Surge
ROK Inflation Eases To 4.2% In April
Feds Phase Out Paper Social Security Checks
Google Memo Reveals Importance Of Android Location Database
NASA Delays Launch Of Shuttle Endeavour At Least One Week
Lawyer Bait: Steve Jobs In Carbonite IPhone Case




SPORTS
Celtics Lose Plot, Heads In The Heat

The Celtics chose...poorly.

Celtics give the game away, fall 99-90

Sharks Taking Up Residence In Red Wings’ Heads

Ethier Extends Hitting Streak But Padres Shut Out Dodgers Anyway




Before, He Was Merely Mild-Mannered Outfielder Coco Crisp; Now, He Is AFRO MAN!

Lecavalier Sends Bolts Home Up Two Games Over Caps

Grizzlies Outmuscle Thunder For Game 1 Win, 114-101

White Sox End Ugly April With Ugly 6-2 Loss To O’s



FAMOUS FOR BEING FAMOUS
Lorenzo Lamas Marries Wife #5

Lorenzo Lamas and his new bride Shawna Craig

Tied the knot in Cabo San Lucas Saturday after a year-long engagement

Duke Of Cambridge Rejects Pre-Nup Suggestion

Mariah Carey, Nick Cannon Welcome Twins

Bruce & Demi’s Kid Busted For Alcohol Possession

A Message From Emma Watson About Leaving Brown

Sheen Gloats “Men” Can’t Survive Without Him

Arnold Schwarzenegger Picks His Next Film: Cry Macho

Chace Crawford Cuts Deal In Pot Case

Vampire Diaries’ Paul Wesley And Actress Torrey DeVitto Married



FOREIGNERS
Missile strike On Gaddafi Compound Followed Intercept Of High-Level Communications
Deal To End Yemen Crisis Faltering As Talks Bog
Israel Remembers Holocaust Victims
Sri Lanka’s President Rejects Call For War Crimes Probe
Harper Urges BC To Spurn Dippers, Avoid Repeat Of “Lost Decade”
Muslim Brotherhood Raises Its Sights In Egypt



BLOGS & STUFF
Tim Blair: Obama Speaks
Althouse: Obama Was Pretty Funny At the White House Correspondents Dinner
Jammie Wearing Fool: Bloomberg’s Immigration Solution – Make Them Live In Detroit
Debra Saunders: The Intolerant Left Strikes Again
Weekly Standard: Paul Ryan Gets Standing O At Town Hall Meeting
Moe Lane: FDA Victory In The War On Raw Milk!
The Volokh Conspiracy: Victims Of Communism Day
Mudville Gazette: Workers Of The World Unite
Blackfive: Phelps Family Film Festival
The People’s Cube: Surviving May 2nd – Even Reds Get The Blues

— compiled by Wombat-socho

National Offend a Feminist Week 2011

For the third consecutive year, we are pleased to inaugurate this annual festival of fun, quoting the immortal words of our charter:

Hey, sweetheart, when I say “bring me a cup of coffee,” I mean bring me fresh coffee, OK?

All bloggers are invited to make their contributions to this weeklong celebration of reactionary traditionalism. This event is an expression of “How to Get a Million Hits on Your Blog,” Rule 5D: Feminism sucks.

You can never go wrong in the blogosphere by having a laugh at the expense of feminists. All sane people hate feminism, and no one hates feminism more than smart, successful, independent women who’ve made it on their own without all that idiotic “Sisterhood Is Powerful” groupthink crap

So we caution that this is not about about offending women, but rather it is about offending the idiotic groupthinkers. We offer this example of an image that is guaranteed to offend feminists everywhere. Continue reading National Offend a Feminist Week 2011 →

Going to the Hospital
UPDATE: Diagnosed With Pneumonia

Nothing to worry about. At least I hope not.

You will recall that I came down with a bad cold in March, when I took my Nyquil and slept for most of two days. Then I got better, before I started suffering with a chest cold that has lingered for about three weeks.

My wife and two or three of our kids also had this same awful cough, but theirs got better, while I believe mine has developed into pleurisy. I had a mild case of pleurisy 20 years ago, which is why I recognize the main symptom: Chest so sore it hurts to cough. And I mean “hurts” like being stabbed in the ribs.

So, anyway, my wife is taking me to the emergency room tonight, where I hope they’ll quickly diagnose me, give me antibiotics and something for the pain, and send me home for a speedy recovery. But you should probably hit the tip jar just in case.

UPDATE: Treated and released. Diagnosed with pneumonia. Chest still very sore. Prescription for heavy-duty painkiller should help. Also antibiotics.

While I was in the emergency room, it was announced that Osama bin Laden is dead. So I’m better off than he is, anyway.


Rule 5 Sunday: The Marshall Plan

We begin this week’s Rule 5 roundup with a submission from last week that I recovered from the spam filter too late for last week’s Rule 5 Sunday. Let us now contemplate nature with That Mr. G Guy, who submitted this pic of a cougar asleep in a tree.

The POH Diaries sent in this post with Taylor Schilling, currently starring in Atlas Shrugged, and if you haven’t seen it yet, why not? Not content with that, he also submitted links for Lucy Pinder, Neve Campbell, and a meditation on Ye Olde Upskirt Traffic*.

Postaldog seems to be taking Rule 5 to its logical conclusion by featuring said content in pretty much every post. NTTAWWT! Fishersville Mike, on the other hand, goes for quality over quantity with this post on 1980-vintage Jaclyn Smith . Randy’s Roundtable brings us Katie Richmond (is it just me, or does she look like a young Victoria Jackson?) and Shauna Sand.

Meanwhile, Soylent Green (pretty much all NSFW all the time, as if you needed to be told by now) brings us beavers along with the usual bunnies at Easter, presents Sharae Spears as the Monday Motivationer, a midweek shower break, Dasha Astafieva, Not Quite A Corset Firday, and something about an Iron P3nis. O_o

Apparently there was a Royal Wedding in the UK this past week. and the Rio Norte Line thoughtfully provides a Royally Hot Rule 5 Post featuring various attractive princesses, one of which is NSFW but the remainder of which are quite tasteful. Eye of Polyphemus turns his attention to a quite different product of Merrie Olde England, Dr. Who – or more correctly, the current Doctor’s sidekick, played by the rather cute Karen Gillan. Love the icon change, sir.

Proof Positive’s Vintage Babe this week is Ann-Margret. Compare and contrast to Catrinel Menghia; use only one side of the paper, please. Proof also pays Rule 5 Tribute to the newly minted Duchess of Cambridge, including an actual upskirt shot.

DaleyGator was busy with the Rule 5 this week, what with Arianny Celeste, Lauren London, Taylor Makakoa, Maxim’s Hometown Hotties Brandi, Alyssa, and Caterina; Sila Sahin (NSFW), Yurika Shiratori (with video), Sophie Turner, and finally the Gator’s own Rule 5 roundup.

The Camp of the Saints leads off with Gianna Amore, who’s got the 80s hair going on; he follows with Pippa Middleton, Lynne Turner, and some very important Rule 5 news to finish up the week.

Maggie’s Notebook brings us ten hot swim suits and the women in them that make them hot. Ah, but from Dustbury comes the lady forever identified with her most famous role: Carolyn Jones, in a rare pre-Addams Family photo; also, Mr. Hill comments on the impending change at the Today Show in a manner relevant to our interests. Three Beers Later continues his homage to Juliana Moriera, and A View From The Beach wraps up this week’s roundup with a long look at the Fifth Republic’s First Lady, Carla Bruni.

Thanks to all for their submissions! For inclusion in next week’s Rule 5 Sunday, send your links to me at Rule 5 Wombat by April 7.

*Unfortunately the post lacks any Rule 5 content. 🙁