Rule 5 Sunday

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by Smitty

Rule 5 needs to start off with an apology. The simple appreciation of loveliness has escalated into something called the “Boob Wars”. Miscreants who have become bogged down in this completely unnecessary war of choice include:

Your humble Rule 5 aggregator has even been encouraged to Choose Sides! What these cheesers don’t even realize is that the whole war was won a priori by South Park character Kenny in the Major Boobage episode . Rule 5 Sunday officially frowns upon this wretched excess, and pleads for peace in our time.  Or something.

  • A Conservative Shemale mixes Russian cheerleaders and Susanna Hoffs to good effect.
  • The Manolo celebrated a men’s ice skating silver medalist.
  • Yankee Phil, in other Olympic news, photoblogs a date so strange as to be inexplicable.
    Topping this required a bacon post.
  • Fausta brings the cultural break, Monica Paz & Nestor La Vitola performing a tango.
  • Michael Yon mourned the passing of a Rule V badass, Robert L. Howard.
  • Instapundit admits defeat at the hands of Nude Women of Curling.
  • SI VIS PACEM brings a cultural moment with some William Adolph Bouguereau
  • Fishersville Mike has a bit of a walkabout and celebrates Miss West Virginia. He then recalled Johnny Cash. I’ll confess more of a Dick Dale fancy:


Both American icons.

That’s your Rule 5 Sunday post. Send updates and additions to Smitty.

11-Year-Old’s Mom Gets Upset About Middle School’s Online Dating Site

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You’ve got to admit this could get kind of creepy:

ELWOOD, Ind. – Most parents agree that matchmaking Web sites and surveys are games mainly adults should play, but some say Elwood Community Schools has been getting students in on the action.
Parent Michelle Everett says her 11-year-daughter recently brought home a survey from school. The survey is a fundraising tool used by the school corporation for the middle school drama club. Students pay a buck or two each and a computer matches compatible boys and girls in grades six through 10. The more they pay the more matches are found.
“I don’t believe that at 11 years old a school should be promoting opposite sex matching,” said Everett. “A tenth grader matched with a sixth grader? And the school promoting it and it’s inappropriate.” . . .
“When I started to read it and it said a list of the members of the opposite sex that are the most compatible for you, that you can buy the list. I thought ‘red flags, red flags’,” said Everett. . . .
“I think it is promoting kids to be with the opposite sex at a young age,” Everett said.

Of course, according to the rules of modern media, it’s impossible to have a story like this without expert commentary:

Dr. Keith Ablow, a psychiatrist and Fox News contributor, agreed the fundraiser could have some negative consequences.
“It encourages adolescents to consider their relationships just as ‘adult’ as any other relationships typically kindled by ‘matchmaking,’” Ablow said. “This could certainly lead them to believe they are ready to engage in adult encounters.” . . .
“Adults creating a system that makes them ‘matchmakers’ for children is psychologically indefensible,” Ablow said.

How many alumni of Elwood Community Schools will one day make their national TV debut on Dateline NBC with Chris Hansen?

She Just Digs Those New Media Guys

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A minor uproar erupted Friday on Twitter when I sent this message:

#FF Everyone should follow Steven Crowder @scrowder if only because his girlfriend is totally HAAAWWWTT! #FollowFriday

The aforesaid girlfriend’s friend, Alyssa Cordova of the Clare Boothe Luce Policy Institute, took umbrage:

@rsmccain #degrading

Requiring me to offer the following defense:

@LyssCordova I met Hillary at CPAC last year; kidding with @scrowder is merely a jocular way to congratulate him on his good fortune

@scrowder @LyssCordova Neutral objective journalism: @MarcoRubio is also hot http://bit.ly/929i6Z But I’m not gay [] #NTTAWWT

@LyssCordova It has long been my assertion that beauty exists as an objective fact, independent of our admiration, which is wholly natural

Of course, Steven Crowder is a worthy man in his own right, but it was during CPAC this year that I discovered the PJTV host was dating a lovely young lady named Hillary. She had created quite the sensation last year at CPAC ’09 — everyone asking, “Hey, who’s the blonde?” — which required me to make the necessary introductions:

Here we see Hillary at CPAC ’09 posing platonically with Stephen Green of Vodkapundit who, for some odd reason, wasn’t drinking vodka. And I will not identify which of my lady blogger friends offered the appraisal that Stephen is totally HAAAWWWTT.

My theory is that, in contemporary culture, young ladies have become unaccustomed to being paid compliments outside the context of being “hit on.” Because of feminism and political correctness, young guys have never learned to flatter a girl merely for the sake of flattery.

What ambitious young man would take the chance of a flirtatious joke, when even the mildest humor might lead to accusations of sexism? So the only time a girl is ever told she’s pretty is when some guy is trying to score. This is just one more example of how modernism squeezes all the charm and grace out of society.

As I say, beauty exists as an objective fact, for which we all should be grateful, and we ought not be compelled to pretend otherwise.

UPDATE: Here is Crowder defending CPAC on Fox & Friends:

News From Southern Appalachia

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When Instapundit featured the headline, “Knoxville girl wins regional spelling bee,” I sort of figured the Knoxville girl in question might be named Reynolds.

But in fact the winner was Ameena Iqbal, a fifth-grader at Blue Grass Elementary School in West Knoxville, who edged out Nithya Kanagasegar, an eighth-grader at Homestead Elementary School in Crossville.

Once these kids learned to spell their own names, the rest was easy . . .

Indiana 8th District Candidate Rides to Daytona Bike Week Freedom Rally

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Kristi Risk is one of five Republican candidates in Indiana’s 8th Congressional District, currently represented by Democrat Rep. Brad Ellsworth, who is running for Evan Bayh’s Senate seat. Risk rode down to Daytona to attend Bike Week Freedom Rally and had her photo taken with “Take Our Country Back” singer Chris Cassone:

I suppose I should make clear that I am not in Daytona. Chris Cassone sent me the photo and will likely send more reports tomorrow — hopefully with hot biker babes in bikinis. Republican congressional candidates are fine, but if you’re in Daytona for Bike Week . . .

Marie Osmond’s Son Commits Suicide

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Jumped out of a building at age 18:

ET has obtained new details about the investigation into the suicide death of Marie Osmond‘s 18-year-old son Michael Blosil.
Blosil jumped to his death from his Los Angeles apartment on Friday night around 9 p.m. The Los Angeles Fire Department tells us they received a 911 call at 9:24 p.m. and were dispatched a minute later. An individual who’d fallen from a 15-story building was found dead at the scene of the incident. . . .
Blosil is one of Marie Osmond’s eight children. He wrote in his suicide note that he’d suffered from life-long depression.

Horrible news.

Hopium Vs. ManBearPig: Which Is Correct?

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by Smitty

Gateway Pundit has a clip featuring BHO noting that we cannot control Nature:

At a low frequency, the POTUS emits noises that lead one to believe he has a reasonable view of reality.
Newsbusters has ManBearPig coming at this uncontrollable nature from a different angle, and boy is he serial:

It would be an enormous relief if the recent attacks on the science of global warming actually indicated that we do not face an unimaginable calamity requiring large-scale, preventive measures to protect human civilization as we know it. . .

So, which gentleman is correct? Trick question! Neither! While seemingly opposite, they are both on the same side. They both represent the abdication of liberty in favor of small groups of people who are adept at portraying themselves smarter and more competent, to the detriment of society.
The beauty of being a Progressive is that all roads lead to state power, irrespective of superficial and occasionally dramatic contradiction.

Update: HotAir enjoys a set of related quotes. Do enjoy the Cavuto clip. Senator Inhofe:

“Every assertion that [ManBearPig] made in his science fiction movie has now been disproven.”