In The Mailbox: 05.21.20

We sat down at one of the outdoor picnic tables. It was a nice sunny day — a little cool and windy, but nice. An awning shaded the tables that serve as the Longbranch Saloon’s smoking area under normal operation, but which are now the dining room due to “social distancing” rules.

(Click photo to see full-size)

Only 25 people were permitted to congregate outside, which I suppose might be a problem on a weekend night, but on a Wednesday afternoon, Kirby and I were the only early-arriving patrons, so there was no danger of us violating the health department regulations. After a few minutes, the guy from the kitchen came out to ask us what we’d like to drink.

“Do you have any beer specials?” I asked.

“Not really. Everything’s two dollars.”

“Two dollar beer! Do you have Yuengling?”

Indeed they did. So I ordered Pennsylvania’s finest lager, and Kirby ordered iced tea, because he is a professional driver.

Normally, Kirby drives a semi truck, but last summer, high blood pressure resulted in the suspension of his commercial license, and this eventually led to the decision to move him up here with our family while he recuperated. His health has been improving, and we hope in a few more months he’ll be able to resume his life on the road, but for now my brother is the professional driver of our old Nissan. So he drove us the 30-odd miles to the Longbranch Saloon and Grill, the mailing address of which is Hedgesville, W.Va., but which is actually nearest a crossroads hamlet called Johnsonville. It’s about 10 miles west of I-81 via West Virginia Rte. 901, which passes the historic Hammond House at Spring Mills, then loops down to Hedgesville, where you turn right and head west on Rte. 9 for four miles then turn left at Baxter Road. The Longbranch Saloon is about a mile down Baxter Road on the right.

Anyway, when the man returned with our beverages, I asked his name — Brian — and if the kitchen was open. Yes, and he furnished us with menus, then left us to consider our choices. After a few minutes, he returned. I ordered the cheeseburger with fries ($7.50), while Kirby ordered the jalapeño poppers ($4), and I said: “Oh, and bring me another Yuengling.” Journalism is thirsty work, and after two months of lockdown, I’d gone through that first 12 ounces with surprising rapidity.

Honestly, there are few places in America where you are less likely to contract COVID-19 than in Hedgesville. West Virginia has one of the lowest infection rates in the country, with just over 1,500 known cases so far. The Mountaineer State didn’t report its first case until March 17, and a month later still had only 777 known coronavirus cases. The peak of the pandemic, in terms of daily new cases, was April 24, when 48 new cases were reported statewide; in the past week (May 14-20), 163 new cases were reported, an average of about 23 new cases per day. So far, there have been a total of only 69 COVID-19 deaths in West Virginia, which has a per-capita death rate 97% lower than the rate in New York.

Hedgesville is scarcely a hotbed of viral contagion, although Berkeley County has been relatively hard-hit by West Virginia standards, with 245 coronavirus cases and six deaths from the disease. This is no doubt due to the proximity to Washington, D.C. (about 90 miles southeast of Hedgesville), and the county being bisected by Interstate 81.

Despite the relatively low risk of infection, “social distancing” regulations were still in effect Wednesday at the Longbranch Saloon, so we were sitting outside on this pleasant spring day. The awning-covered outdoor dining area was adjacent to a wide lawn, with a weeping willow tree, and there was a fire pit, where I suppose people huddle around on cool evenings. After a while, Kirby and I were joined by a third patron, a retiree who had come to have a mid-afternoon beer, and we made polite small talk for a few minutes before Brian returned to bring us our food.

(Click photo to see full-size)

The burger was good, and served with crinkle-cut fries. Perhaps the gourmets of New York would turn up their snooty noses as such a meal, but they can’t go out to dinner because New York is still locked down under the regime of Mayor Bill de Blasio. Probably there are lots of people in New York — not the snooty gourmet types, but regular New Yorkers — who dream of sitting outdoors near a willow tree on a spring day, enjoying a $7.50 cheeseburger plate and a cold $2 Yuengling.

It’s “almost heaven” in West Virginia, if you appreciate simple pleasures, and I was grateful for Tim Carney’s Washington Examiner column this week that alerted me to the opportunity to enjoy a meal at the Longbranch. When the cook/waiter Brian returned, I asked him if he realized that this establishment was now the most famous saloon in West Virginia, but he apparently hadn’t read Tim’s column. If you keep up with the news in West Virginia, however, the news is good:

West Virginia Gov. Jim Justice signed an executive order allowing his state to enter the “Week 4” phase of coronavirus reopening on Thursday, which will include reopening indoor dining at restaurants, malls and outdoor recreation.
Large retail stores, tanning businesses, outdoor recreation rentals and campgrounds will also be reopened.
The new order also rescinds the requirement for out-of-state travelers visiting West Virginia to self-quarantine for 14 days upon their arrival.
The governor also outlined the plans for Week 5 reopening, expected to begin after Memorial Day, which will allow bars to open at 50 percent and museums, visitor centers, zoos, spas and massage businesses to open their doors.
At the same time, the Republican governor announced the results of his initiative to test every nursing home patient in the state, the first such policy in the U.S.
In total, 22,598 people at 123 nursing homes were tested, including 8,911 residents and 13,687 staff members. This resulted in the identification of COVID-19 in 28 new facilities. Thirty-one new staff and 11 new residents were identified as COVID-19 positive.

Thousands of New York nursing home patients have died because of Cuomo’s policy, while West Virginia is the only state in the country to have tested every nursing home resident for COVID-19. Tell me again, New Yorkers, how much smarter you are than these rustic hillbillies.

(Click photo to see full-size)

We finished our meals, and Brian brought the tab — $16.50 for a cheeseburger and fries, jalapeño poppers, two beers and an iced tea. I tipped $3.50, bringing the total tab to $20. Helping the local economy, like a patriotic American. There was a deadline looming, so we bid adieu to beautiful Hedgesville and made it back home by 5. Thanks to everyone who hit the tip jar for our trip to West By God Virginia.

In The Mailbox: 05.20.20

Posted on | May 20, 2020 | 1 Comment

— compiled by Wombat-socho

Please remember to share this and other posts to Twitter and other social media.

OVER THE TRANSOM
Ninety Miles From Tyranny: The 90 Miles Mystery Box, Episode #992
357 Magnum: Edenville Dam Collapse
EBL: Kate Brown – Crushing Freedom In Oregon
Twitchy: WH Press Secretary Kayleigh “Honey Badger” McEnany Dropkicks Chris Cuomo Over Hydroxychloroquine
Louder With Crowder: Dan Crenshaw – The Left Is Using COVID-19 To Restructure America
Vox Popoli: A Quiet End, also, The Corona-Chan Narrative Implodes

RIPPED FROM THE HEADLINES
Adam Piggott: Lady Karen Writers
American Conservative: Why Trump Will Likely Lose In November
American Greatness: VA Secretary Cleans Up Phony Media Narrative About Hydroxychloroquine Study
American Thinker: Obama’s De Facto Russian Collusion Co-Conspirators
Animal Magnetism: Animal’s Hump Day News
Babalu Blog: Today Is Cuban Independence Day
Baldilocks: Dreaming Of Next Year
BattleSwarm: Vice President MegaKaren?
Cafe Hayek: Reducing Spending > Raising Taxes
CDR Salamander: The Return Of An Old Red Friend
Da Tech Guy: Guess States Are Missing Those Trump Boom Tax Revenues
Don Surber: Put The Rubes In Charge
The Geller Report: VIDEO – Bald-Faced Liar Susan Rice Denies Knowing Anything About Unmasking, also, Gov. Coonface Klanrobe (NSDAP-VA) Ditches Beach Restrictions After Thousands Defy His Diktat
Hogewash: Team Kimberlin Post Of The Day, also, Phone Calls With Foreigners
Hollywood In Toto: Union Bridge Asks Too Much Of Its Audience, also, How The Wrong Missy Bungles The Rom-Com Template
Legal Insurrection: Pelosi Tries To Make Fat-Shaming Great Again, also, Mika Demands To Speak To Twitter’s Manager About Trump’s Account
Michelle Malkin: Stop Training Saudi Arabia’s Jihad Pilots
The PanAm Post: 116 Countries Call For Independent Coronavirus Investigation In Red China
Power Line: Coronavirus In One State (Part 45), also, Ron DeSantis Has Had Enough
Shark Tank: Rep. Mast Appalled That Veterans’ Cemeteries Still Closed
Shot In The Dark: A Look Ahead To Government Healthcare
STUMP: Moneypalooza Monstrosity! The Positioning Of Asking For State Government Bailouts
The Political Hat: Open Season For Election Fraud In The Silver State
This Ain’t Hell: Mike Torres, Phony War Veteran, also, Navy Declares 100 Meter Standoff
Victory Girls: Governor Cuomo Must Answer For Nursing Home Deaths
Volokh Conspiracy: Trump’s Threat To Withhold Federal Funds From States Expanding Vote-By-Mail – A Growing Menace to Federalism & Separation Of Powers?
Weasel Zippers: Virus Lockdown Rioting In Chile, Martial Law Imposed, also, Kayleigh McEneny Levels Susan Rice Over Flynn Actions
Mark Steyn: The Woman Who Saved An Innocent Man

Amazon Warehouse Deals

Category: Linkagery

We Made It

Posted on | May 20, 2020 | 2 Comments

(Click photo to see full-size)

When we got to Hedgesville, we turned right and the GPS on Kirby’s phone said, “Continue west on West Virginia 9 for four miles.”

“Four miles!” my brother exclaimed.

What the heck had gotten into my head, to bring us so far out into the boondocks of Berkeley County, W.Va.? I blame Tim Carney of the Washington Examiner, who reported this week that the Longbranch Saloon and Grill in Hedgesville was actually serving beer. Sitting down in a bar and ordering a beer isn’t something you would normally think of as a special experience, but these are not normal times. After two months of COVID-19 lockdown, I was craving it. As soon as I saw Tim’s article, I resolved to follow up on his scoop and, also, do my part to help stimulate the economy. It was my duty as a patriotic American.

So I rattled the tip jar and we hit the road, Kirby driving because he is, after all, a professional driver. We got off I-81 at the Spring Mills exit and turned right, headed toward Hedgesville. I had glanced briefly at Google Maps and had a general idea that the Longbranch was out in the sticks, but how far out in the sticks it was didn’t fully register until we made that right turn at Hedgesville. “Four miles!”

Kirby began humming “Dueling Banjos” and making Deliverance jokes, which is very unkind, promoting harmful stereotypes of the Appalachian-American community. But the SPLC has never objected to hillbilly jokes, so I suppose it’s OK. Westward we rolled, and Kirby said, “Now I don’t want to hear your bitching about not having a signal.” But my phone still showed a connection until, after the appointed four miles, we turned left onto Baxter Road, at which point Kirby’s phone said, “GPS signal lost.”

Fortunately, it was only another mile to the Longbranch, and after a few winding curves, there it was on the right side of the road. So I got out of the car, walked up to the front door and . . . locked.

What? Had Tim lied to me? Then I remembered what Ace had said about Carney being one of those spineless #NeverTrump cucks, and I was just about ready to believe it. We’d driven a long way for this, however, and I wasn’t giving up so easy. So I walked around to the side of the building and heard voices coming from inside. Grabbing the knob on the side door, I turned and . . . open!

Looking inside, I saw this was the back of the kitchen, not an entrance for customers. “Hello? Anybody home?”

No answer. But I headed around back, trying to see if there was anyone around, and was just about to give up when a guy came out of the kitchen.

“Can I help you?”

TO BE CONTINUED . . .

+ – + – + – + – +

Wanted to give readers the first half of the story, because you hit the freaking tip jar, but right now I’m on deadline for a column tomorrow for The American Spectator, a column that has nothing to do with taverns in West Virginia, so in the morning, I’ll pick this up where I left off.

UPDATE: Click here for Part Two of the story.

Category: Shoe Leather Fund, West Virginia

The Big Yellow Button Has Returned

Posted on | May 20, 2020 | 3 Comments

Occasionally, when the need arises to rattle the tip jar, I supersize the PayPal contribution button, and today is such an occasion.

You see, we’ve been on COVID-19 lockdown here for more than two months, which means I haven’t been able to go out and enjoy a cold malt beverage since mid-March. And then I learned from investigative journalist Tim Carney that such an establishment is open within a 45-minute drive of my Undisclosed Location. This information made me very thirsty, for some reason. Obviously, I must engage in some old-fashioned shoe-leather reporting to follow up on Tim’s scoop.

IYKWIMAITYD.

The Five Most Important Words in the English Language are:

HIT THE FREAKING TIP JAR!

Category: Shoe Leather Fund

‘Biological Leninism’

Posted on | May 20, 2020 | 1 Comment

Why has Stacey Abrams become a darling of the Democratic Party? Why is an otherwise obscure former state legislator a “rising star,” when her only accomplishment was (a) losing a gubernatorial election by more than 50,000 votes and (b) blaming her defeat on racist “suppression”?

A friend tipped me to one possible explanation — “Biological Leninism”:

So again, the genius of Leninism was in building a ruling class from scratch and making it cohesive by explicitly choosing people from low-status groups, ensuring they would be loyal to the party given they had much to lose. . . .
If you live in a free society, and your status is determined by your natural performance; then it follows that to build a cohesive Leninist ruling class you need to recruit those who have natural low-status. . . .
There’s a reason why there’s so many evil fat women in government. Where else would they be if government didn’t want them? They have nothing going on for them, except their membership in the Democratic party machine. The party gives them all they have, the same way the Communist party had given everything to that average peasant kid who became a middling bureaucrat in Moscow.

An interesting theory. Probably racist — “RAAAAACIST!” — but interesting. It may also explain why the wretched Gretchen Whitmer is on Joe Biden’s vice-presidential short list. No sane person would vote for her, but insanity has become a pandemic among Democrats.

Incompetence attracts incompetence https://t.co/9pyfxw9TYE

— Breitbart News (@BreitbartNews) May 20, 2020

Washington Post Roundly Mocked For ‘Bizarre’ Stacey Abrams Profile Comparing Her To ‘A Runway Supermodel.’ https://t.co/aYlnjiUgwK

— Daily Caller (@DailyCaller) May 18, 2020

Category: Democrats, Racism

Chelsey Coyer: American Hero

Posted on | May 20, 2020 | Comments Off on Chelsey Coyer: American Hero

Video of a news report about the reopening of a Texas beach has gone viral. The annual party on Bolivar Peninsula — “Go Topless Jeep Weekend” — was covered by Jordan James of Beaumont’s KBMT-TV, who managed to keep a straight face while interviewing Chelsey Coyer:

“We been in quarantine and like, I need to get out and party. Whoo!”

What made this an instant classic was when Chelsey said, “Wash them hands for 20 seconds and keep them clean with the Germ-X — totally!”

Now, it seems a bit cruel to point out that Chelsey apparently didn’t spend her time in quarantine riding her Peloton bike, nibbling on veggies. No, she’s a biscuits-and-gravy girl if ever I saw one. And if you watch the video, you’ll see lots of biscuits-and-gravy folks on the beach.

Say what you will about Texans, they eat good, and are evidently immune to fat-shaming. Everything really is bigger in Texas, I reckon.

Not even SNL could not write something as ridiculous as this actual, real news report from my local station pic.twitter.com/VVTziwuyOd

— socially distant rendon (@maria_rendon97) May 18, 2020

You can’t keep Texans in quarantine forever, bless their hearts.

(Hat-tip: Ed Driscoll at Instapundit.)

UPDATE: This event — “Go Topless Jeep Weekend” — has grown increasingly rowdy. Last year, things got so out of control that some residents started a petition to ban the event. By the way, watching the news coverage, you’ll see that Bolivar Peninsula (named for 19th-century South American leader Simon Bolivar) is pronounced “BAH-luh-vur” by locals, whereas I would have pronounced it “BOE-luh-vahr.”

This issue of local pronunciation is common throughout the South, where names derived from Latin languages are given an Anglicized pronunciation. If you are a student of military history, for example, you know that the Georgia town of Resaca was named for Resaca de la Palma, scene of an America victory in the Mexican War. Resaca, Georgia, was the site of a 1864 Civil War battle and, reading about the battle in history books, I assumed the town name was pronounced “Ruh-SAH-cuh,” but when I moved to Gordon County as a sports editor in the late 1980s, I discovered that the locals pronounce it “Ruh-SACK-uh.” Similarly, you will find the locals in Lafayette, Georgia, pronouncing their town’s name with the emphasis on the second syllable, which isn’t how the French officer pronounced his name. Oh, and Taliaferro County, Georgia? Locals pronounced that as “Tolliver.”