Category: humor

Christie/Obama Caption Contest

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by Smitty

Things Christie might be saying to tighten Obama’s jaw:

 

  • “Did you read that book I sent you by Walter Mondale, Psychological Strategies for Dealing with a Crushing Election Defeat?”
  • “If you need coaching for how to deal with actual media, I can help wean you off of MTV and Strolling Drone.”
  • “Has your wife stopped beating you?”
  • “I find that, when throwing the weight around, it is helpful to have some weight.”
  • “We went under the Hurricane Sandra bus like she was a pack of Benghazi jihadis doing their impression of Keenau Reeves in Speed.”
  • “You know that Lincoln bit about fooling some of the people some of the time? Yeahhh, that’s kinda up for ya.”
  • “I’m curious what dirt you have on Bruce Springsteen to get him to prostitute himself for your campaign like that.”
  • “Isn’t it ironic that a guy as anti-British as you sits at a desk made from the timber of the H.M.S. Resolute?”
  • “Have you figured out the pricing structure for presidential pardons yet?”
  • “What if it turns out that the people are far less stupid than you treat them?”

via Breitbart

Update: linked by Jackie Wellfonder

Update II: linked by Daily Pundit, who accuses me of being too nice. I’m wiling to commit to a definite maybe.

@bobby_knuckles Brings The Funny

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by Smitty

Some lefty weenie named ‘Bobby Knuckles’ (after that which he drags?) bethinks himself a comic:


(Click for full size–UPDATE: or, indeed, to view it, as somebody has their laundry in a bunch over what amounts to pure piffle.)

As a part of this blog’s relentless quest for clarity, combined with our tireless efforts to help Lefties liberate their heads from dark, confined locations, I will now aid @bobby_knuckles with a round of Sentence Completion:
Typical Liberal . . .completion
Embraces higher education and persons of learning . . .because if that radical feminist book doesn’t look like a teddy bear, you may not have dropped enough acid yet at your Noam Chomsky Gangnam party.
Aspires to finish graduate school and views life as continuous learning process . . .one of these years, when the school wearies of seeing her face and grants a degree in ‘Critical Trans-racial Trans-gender Transmission Theory Studies’.
Positions formed from facts, logic, study, reason, and careful analysis . . .for fact-free, non-Euclidian, sophomoric, un-serious, irrational and irresponsible values of ‘analysis’.
Willing to re-visit own positions or question conventional wisdom on the auspices that improvements can be uncovered . . .on her own time, while carefully explaining to adults: “SHUT UP!”
Respectful of the Golden Rule: “How would policy changes affect me if I was wearing the other guy’s shoes?” . . .because she’s too steeped in her Paganism to recall that the Golden Rule hasn’t got a thing to do with public policy, in the sense of ‘policy changes’.
Gathers information from sources that at the very least strive towards being objective or impartial . . .as defined by the New York Times, which, for example, had 93 front page articles on Valerie Plame, compared to a whopping ZERO (0) so far concerning Benghazi, as they wrap themselves in Nate Silver’s spare ‘Cloak of Impartiality’ (or is that a tattered Code Pink costume?).
Pragmatic and open minded; realizes that compromise is a necessary part of working with others and making progress . . .which is why she advocates that Zimbabwe Ben offer further Quantitative Easing to fund her psychological investment in enjoying a guilt-free affluence.

In summary, Bobby, the last four years of listening to pompous little twerps assert some superiority when they ain’t packin’ the gear has my tolerance worn a little thin. If you’re wanting some life lessons, (in a serious way), I’m happy to point you to the same old place that the good advice has always been located.

However, if checking your punk attitude at the door is too great a challenge, you are cordially invited to GET OFF MY LAWN!

This post has been brought to you by the hash tag: #Caring

Update:


My pimp hand is strong.

About That Creepy Obama ‘First Time’ Ad

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by Smitty

Via Eric Simmons:

I haven’t heard any response to this tweet:

Update: this just in from Crowder:

Update II: linked at Gay Patriot. Crowder cross-dressing. Had a lengthy conversation with Cynthia Yockey today, who is doing much better. Also talked to Da Tech Guy, on his way home from his New York foray, mentioning that the NY GOP freshman are being inundated with talk of #LadyParts by the Democrats.

#ObamaGoogleHistory What Is My Current Abuse Level At http://theothermccain.com

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by Smitty

This hash tag game had its origins in this:

Slightly strange, this game. I’ve had a lot of love for this tweet:

Yet not so much for this one:

And who doesn’t dig a Harry Reid riff?

#ObamaLoveSongs This (Administration) Is Not A Love Song

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“Are When” #Duh