Category: humor

by Smitty

#ObamaSoftBallQuestions Springsteen “Blinded by the Light” mentions a “teenage diplomat.” Was that the dip’s age, or do teens need an envoy?

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 18, 2012

#ObamaSoftBallQuestions There seem to be a lot of negative survey and employment reports. In the final analysis, are numbers raaaaacist?

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 18, 2012

#ObamaSoftBallQuestions Are there any economic problems for which Bush is not to blame?

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 18, 2012

#
ObamaSoftBallQuestions How much do you think the Koch brothers are really spending to destroy the election’s integrity with voter ID laws?

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 18, 2012

#ObamaSoftBallQuestions Just exactly how much does Chuch Norris fear you?

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 17, 2012

#ObamaSoftBallQuestions If Elvis was alive and he went up against you on American Idol, how harshly would you trash him?

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 17, 2012

#ObamaSoftBallQuestions Does Ryan’s plan stab the elderly in the heart, or is it more of a diesmbowelment?

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 17, 2012

#ObamaSoftBallQuestions When will you appoint a “Shut Up, St00p3d Conservatives” Czar. Cuz that would be k00l.

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 17, 2012

#ObamaSoftBallQuestions If you had been there to make gutsy calls, could WWII have been finished in 2 years, or is 3 more realistic?

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 17, 2012

#ObamaSoftBallQuestions These conservatives seem hacked off that Zimbabwe Ben is inflating the currency so much. Can Bernanke’s ink run dry?

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 17, 2012

#ObamaSoftBallQuestions When you’re crowned King, will you let George Clinton and Bootsy Collins bring back Parliament?

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 17, 2012

#ObamaSoftBallQuestions How many Congressmen and -women who voted against your immaculate budget submissions should be allowed to run again?

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 17, 2012

And this was the winner on retweets:

#ObamaSoftBallQuestions Tucker Carlson called Chris Matthews a throne sniffer. Is it wrong to imply that you leave an odor on your seat?

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 17, 2012

#ObamaSoftballQuestions reference for my previous tweet: mediaite.com/tv/tucker-carl…

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 17, 2012

by Smitty

#VotingForObamaBidenIsLike going on a second bender to see if that massive tequila hangover was actually caused by eating the worm or not.

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 12, 2012

#VotingForObamaBidenIsLike saying, hey: paying the Danegeld really wasn’t all that bad, was it? en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Danegeld

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 12, 2012

#VotingForObamaBidenIsLike is like going back in time and telling Franklin: “Yeah, about that Republic: we sucked too much to keep it.”

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 12, 2012

#VotingForObamaBidenIsLike admitting you’re so jacked up that you neither appreciate the ballot nor care who’s on it.

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 12, 2012

#VotingForObamaBidenIsLike saying you think The Captain & Tennielle were a great yachting team. captainandtennille.net

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 12, 2012

#VotingForObamaBidenIsLike saying that Hanna-Barbera’s worst mistake was trading Yogi Bear to the Yankees.

— Chris Smith (@smitty_one_each) August 12, 2012

And I had to stop, because I can’t imagine topping this effort:

@smitty_one_each I believe you have achieved the tesseract of twisted inside jokes.Well done.

— richard mcenroe (@richard_mcenroe) August 12, 2012

by Smitty

Obama’s attacks against the right continue:

As American Power points out, “Despite Months of Negative Ads, Voters Not Buying Obama’s Dishonest Attacks on Mitt Romney”

If someone else (the government) did it for Romney,

• How does Romney manage to be a diabolical capitalist, then?
• How is the government both the cause and the cure of all this economic injustice?
• Was the author of Obama’s biographies also a composite character provided from elsewhere?

Via Insty, for anybody who misunderstands the Left’s whole bogus Postmodern attempt to contradict your lying ears, your attention is drawn to this lengthy but worthwhile outing.

Because somebody else put that broom and dustpan there:

by Smitty

Let’s face it: “the idea of two signals racing each other to influence the output first” is a real challenge we face in trying to dig our way to the top of the debt pit.

For example, consider the efforts of the Nobel Committee and #OccupyResoluteDesksince 2009, as captured in this simple graphic:

via Twitchy