Round Up the Usual Memes!

A quick list of Stuff That’s On the Internet:

Life is good.

Why the Washington Post Sucks

Matt Lewis quotes their policy statement:

“Post journalists must refrain from writing, tweeting or posting anything — including photographs or video — that could be perceived as reflecting political, racial, sexist, religious or other bias or favoritism that could be used to tarnish our journalistic credibility.”

Which is hogwash, of course. As long as you get the facts right, who gives a damn about “bias” or “favoritism”?

Is David Weigel prejudiced against social conservatives? Obviously. And that makes him different from other WaPo reporters . . . how?

At least Dave is honest about his prejudices. It is the bogus pretense of objectivity — that synoptic omniscient Broder bullshit — which is truly offensive. Unless Weigel starts makin’ stuff up (Janet Cooke) or plagiarizing (Ruth Shalit) his honest bias is only a problem insofar as it exposes the intrinsic hypocrisy of the WaPo’s official neutrality.

Election 2010: Senate Primaries in Indiana, Ohio and North Carolina

10:45 p.m. ET: It’s all over for progressive Jennifer Brunner, who got electorally date-raped by the Democratic Party good ol’ boy establishment:

Fisher outperformed Brunner in fundraising, had the support of Gov. Ted Strickland (D) and was the preferred candidate of the Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee. . . .
One of Fisher’s top priorities is to forge party unity with Brunner, who accused Fisher’s allies of trying to push her out of the primary, and to replenish his campaign fund to stay competitive with Portman, who had nearly $7 million more in the bank than Fisher as of mid-April.

Let’s hope Brunner tells Fisher to shove his “party unity” where the sun don’t shine. Tell him to beg campaign cash by peddling his corrupt ass to Tim Geithner’s buddies at Goldman Sachs, so he can buy a bunch of TV ads telling Ohio what an “independent voice” he is.

10:30 p.m. ET: Yep — definitely a runoff in North Carolina. With 92% of counties reporting, it’s Marshall 36%, Cunningham 27%. So, who gets the runoff endorsement of Lewis? My guess is he’ll back the establishment candidate, Cunningham, although I doubt that endorsement will actually swing many votes. And if Cunningham can’t beat Marshall head-to-head with the DSCC’s thumb on the scales, how strong is he, anyway? All in all, the omens favor Burr’s re-election.

9:55 p.m. ET: With two-thirds of counties reporting in North Carolina, it’s old white woman Elaine Marshall 37%, establishment-backed white guy Cal Cunningham 27%, and idealistic black guy Ken Lewis 16%. So the two crackers are likely heading to the Democratic runoff, which pretty much guarantees a weak Democratic turnout in November. Life is good.

9:45 p.m. ET: Chris Cilizza on the Fisher-Brunner mess:

In Ohio, Fisher quickly united state and national party leaders behind his candidacy but struggled to put away the challenge from Secretary of State Jennifer Brunner.
National Democrats insist that Fisher had righted the ship a few months ago with a change in campaign manager but his fundraising in the first three months was weak and, as a result, fell further behind former Rep. Rob Portman (R) in the chase for campaign cash.

Fisher emerges from the primary weakened, having spent $1 million to crush Brunner’s dream — demoralizing and alienating her progressive supporters — while Portman is sitting there like a GOP Godzilla ready to go stomping through Tokyo. Life is good.

9:26 p.m. ET — Happy, happy, joy, joy! In Ohio’s Democratic primary, the sold-out establishment candidate, Lt. Gov. Lee Fisher, is crushing the progressive dreams of nutroots favorite Jennifer Brunner. With 23% of precincts reporting, it’s Fisher 56%, Brunner 44%, confirming suspicions of the Democratic “base” that their party is controlled by a corrupt elite.

9:20 p.m. ET — With 29 percent of precincts reporting in the North Carolina Democratic primary, Elaine Marshall is at 39% — just shy of the 40% needed to avoid a runoff. She’s easily leading the DSCC’s favorite candidate, Cal Cunningham, and the black community’s favorite candidate, Ken Lewis. Not very likely any of them can beat incumbent Republican Sen. Richard Burr, but the inherent divisiveness of the Democratic primary — the establishment backing the white guy against the old lady and the black guy — is good news for conservatives. A runoff would be sheer heaven.

9:10 p.m. ET – Wow, that was quick — Coats wins Indiana GOP primary:

Former Sen. Dan Coats (R-Ind.) has won the Republican primary for his old seat, holding off a late charge from a state senator with conservative backing.
Coats led state Sen. Marlin Stutzman 40-30 with 65 percent of precincts reporting. The race has been called for Coats.

7:15 p.m. ET – Polls just closed in Indiana and so far — from the Indiana Secretary of State’s office — it’s Dan Coats 5,479 (54%), Marlin Stutzman 3,101 (31%) and John Hostetler 1,072 (11%). Obviously, these are just the very earliest returns. Polls in North Carolina and Ohio close at 7:30 p.m. ET.

Your ‘Ferris Bueller’ Theory Sucks

Professor Ann Althouse loves the “meta” suggestion that Ferris is just a fantasy figure of Cameron’s imagination, a theory that doesn’t work unless Ferris is also imagined by his sister, his parents, etc.

Ferris is the fortunate extrovert whose exploits take on a larger-than-life significance to luckless introverts who admire and/or envy his lack of social inhibition. The careless ease with which Ferris trangresses the rules is a rebuke to Cameron’s innate fearfulness. His liberated existence, however, makes Ferris an object of envy to his scrupulously obedient sister, Jeannie, who complains: “Why should he get to do whatever he wants, whenever he wants? Why should everything work out for him? What makes him so goddamn special?”

As in so much of John Hughes’ work, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off examines the interactions of different types of people. Think of uptight Steve Martin forced into a cross-country journey with careless slob John Candy in Trains, Planes and Automobiles, or the mismatched quintet — geek, freak, jock, rebel and princess — in The Breakfast Club.

Certainly, there is an element of fantasy in the way Ferris gets away with so much mischief, but he is simply a type, exaggerated for dramatic effect, in the same way John Ford exaggerated the stoic frontiersman or 1940s film noir exaggerated the hard-boiled tough guy. Yet as with all such exaggerations, this merely distills the type to its essence. (For a comedic equivalent, compare the unctuously seductive Otter in Animal House.)

The reason Ferris Bueller’s Day Off works is not because Ferris is a fantasy, but rather because he so perfectly represents — in his exaggerated essence — a familiar type.

So, however much Dr. Althouse loves it, the Fight Club theory sucks.

David Brooks Column Doesn’t Suck; DJIA Loses 225 Points: Coincidence?

As a general rule, when Matthew Yglesia leaps to your defense, that’s an ironclad guarantee that you’re wrong, but this latest Brooks column is actually quite good. 

I figure Brooks is sandbagging, setting us up for his next column, which will exceed every imaginable dimension of suckiness.

So the market impact of that Greek debt crisis is probably overrated. Wall Street trembles in fear of the next Brooks column.

Dr. Melissa Couthier: The Other Kind of ‘Gay Marriage’ Not So Good, Either

By which she means the kind in which a gay guy marries a woman, goes out to get it on with random dudes he meets in gay bars and then brings home a chlamydia infection for the missus:

The fact is, many people, gay and straight, want to live the life of a single slut and have the respectability and comfort of family life. . . . Does that let them off the hook for their obnoxious and harmful actions? No.

Definitely not cool. But just because some people occasionally get swept up in the moment . . . Well, who are we to judge?

UPDATE: Since we’re on the subject of right-wing chicks, Cassy Fiano has contributed to National Offend a Feminist Week. As if her mere existence were not enough. And bonus points for mentioning “sausage.”

Contessa Brewer’s Very Bad Day, Or Why Couldn’t Faisal Shahzad Be a Methodist?

We know that this is what liberals really believe, but it’s shocking when one of them is stupid enough to say it out loud:

“I get frustrated and there was part of me that was hoping this was not going to be anybody with ties to any kind of Islamic country because there are a lot of people who want to use this terrorist intent to justify writing off people who believe in a certain way or come from certain countries or whose skin color is a certain way. I mean they use it as justification for really outdated bigotry.”

It might help to consult the Progressive Dictionary:

Bigotry (n.) – Any belief that might cause people to vote Republican.

Contessa Brewer is a particularly intense kind of stupid.

(Hat-tip: Memeorandum.)

UPDATE: Jimmie Bise asks a sensible question:

Why did the entire MSM jump to the same conclusion about Skulking White Man from the surveillance tape?

Speaking of sensible questions, I figured it might be helpful to add a photo of Ms. Brewer, just in case anyone was wondering, How could someone so unfathomably stupid get hired as a network news anchor?

It’s National Offend a Feminist Week, an excellent occasion to point out that having a nice rack isn’t a career disadvantage for “progressive” women. And if anyone is psychologically disturbed enough to Google “Contessa Brewer nude” or “Contessa Brewer topless” . . . well, why shouldn’t they be reading this blog?

UPDATE II: Speaking of naked stupidity, 58% of DKos readers thought the Times Square bomber would turn out to be either a militia nut or a Tea Partier. Via the Rhetorican, who adds:

Word is Faisal Shahzad is a registered Democrat in Connecticut.  Could it be?  Since the guy is an American citizen – and no major media organ to my knowledge is talking about his political allegiances at the national level – I think it’s likely.

Wait a minute: Connecticut Democrat. Who wants to bet that Faisal voted for Ned Lamont? He sure doesn’t seem likely to have been a Joe Lieberman voter, but maybe that’s just my “really outdated bigotry” talking . . .

UPDATE III: Drew M. at AOSHQ calls Ms. Brewer “Our favorite MSNBC News whore,” which is unfortunately crude. Wouldn’t a proper concern for civility require a more dignified designation, such as the Gaping Malodorous Orifice of Journalistic Fraudulence?

The Bigotry of ‘Progress’

“Where it is not necessary to change, it is necessary not to change.”
— Viscount Falkland, 1641

“My attitude toward progress has passed from antagonism to boredom. I have long ceased to argue with people who prefer Thursday to Wednesday because it is Thursday.”
— G.K. Chesterton, 1923

“I can empathize with everyone I cover except for the anti-gay marriage bigots. In 20 years no one will admit they were part of that.”
— Dave Weigel, 2010

Well, as the old Sesame Street song says, one of these things is not like the others. Falkland and Chesterton were conservatives, unafraid to defend sturdy tradition against the impetuous demands issued by advocates of Progress, so-called.

It was an opposition to this radical sense of Progress — i.e., the inexorable overturning of every existing institution as a necessity of “social justice” — that informed Bill Buckley’s famous description of National Review‘s mission as standing athwart history, yelling, “Stop!”

Buckley confessed in 1955 that such resistance was unfashionable, that he was yelling “Stop!” at a time when “no one is inclined to do so, or to have much patience with those who so urge it.” And it ill-behooves conservatives more than a half century later to begin fearing the impatience of the apostles of Progress.

Equality vs. Liberty

Weigel proclaims that he will “happily entertain arguments for the contrary,” but why should he? In the manner of all bien-pensants, he believes he is not merely right but good, and therefore that those who disagree with him are not merely mistaken, but evil.

As I have said of others, Weigel’s basic problem is that he is young. The young generally know only what they have been taught, and teaching nowadays is a profession increasingly monopolized by those who subscribe to dogmatic notions of egalitarianism, the established faith of academic today. Dissenters are as rare as witches in 17th-century Salem (whereas witches are now quite plentiful on campus, as Larry Summers could attest), and we need not marvel that few dare speak heresy.

According to the egalitarian view, inequality is always synonymous with injustice. From such a perspective, those who insist that homosexual relations should be treated differently than marriage — an institution ancient and universal, held by Judeo-Christian tradition to be a holy covenant in accordance with divine commandment — are benighted, prejudiced and, as Weigel says, “bigoted.”

Weigel long worked for the libertarian journal Reason. Despite my own profound libertarian tendencies (being an admirer of the Austrian economists Mises and Hayek), I’ve often found myself at odds with those Reasonoids who see same-sex marriage as a libertarian issue when the arguments for it are in fact egalitarian.

Rather than merely insisting that homosexuals be left alone by government — free from legal compulsion — advocates of same-sex demand that government make war on an established institution in order to compel recognition of a disputed equality. 

Having examined the data, I feel no need to expound on sociological statistics demonstrating that this is just another erroneous egalitarian argument. We cannot make different things the same, merely by pretending that they are the same. (This is, after all, National Offend a Feminist Week.)

Goose-Stepping Toward Utopia

Is all opposition to this egalitarian demand of same-sex marriage a function of “bigotry”? Is the inexorable march of Progress so hasty that in 20 years, as Weigel says, no one will admit to having opposed it?

Certainly it may seem so to the young, who have very little experience of history. Yet Weigel will learn, if he does not already know, that history is not a matter of irrestible, impersonal trends, but can be changed by courageous individuals who decide in obscurity on a course of action that leads them to fame.

Who had ever heard of Whittaker Chambers, before he decided to expose Alger Hiss? In abandoning communism to become an anti-communist, Chambers believed he was joining a cause doomed to defeat. Yet his example inspired others, famously including Ronald Reagan, and within a half-century the Soviet empire had been consigned to the ash-heap of history.

If it seems to Weigel that cultural acceptance of homosexuality makes same-sex marriage inevitable, this is because he makes the mistake of thinking of Progress in terms of extrapolating the recent past. True, gay-rights radicals have made tremendous inroads in the last 20 years and, if they continue at that pace, their opponents will be utterly vanquished in another 20 years.

By the same token, however, if my 11-year-old son keeps growing at his current rate, he’ll be 14 feet tall in 20 years. Even successful political movements do not grow forever, as Karl Rove learned the hard way when his “permanent Republican majority” collapsed in 2006-08. The tide of gay-rights radicalism may have already advanced so far so fast as to outstrip its political resources so that it will now begin to recede, consolidating as part of the status quo, rather than to maintain its revolutionary momentum. And it is not easy to see why such a point may have been reached.

Identity and Demagoguery

Insofar as homosexuals sought only liberty and tolerance, they met little resistance, as even the most conservative Americans take pride in their “live and let live” attitude. Yet Americans balked when it was argued that the logical extension of such tolerance required recognition of homosexuality as the basis of a legal and political identity.

Over the past few decades, Americans have developed a dyspeptic reaction to identity politics and a distaste for the endless legal harassment incited by claims of discriminatory victimhood. The resemblance between the most obstreporous advocates of same-sex marriage and such identity-politics demagogues as Al Sharpton is sufficient to inspire quiet resistance even among those who publicly deplore “homophobia” (a term requiring scare-quotes due to its bogus assertion of diagnostic certainty).

Conservatives need make no slippery-slope arguments about polygamy and pederasty to justify opposition to same-sex marriage. It is sufficient to cite Falkland’s maxim in saying that, the necessity of change having not been demonstrated, it is therefore necessary not to change. If  liberal Wednesday should in fact give way to radical Thursday, conservatives can cite Chesterton in ceasing to argue with the advocates of Progress — although polite silence ought not be confused with fearful assent.

You can’t repeal the law of unintended consequences, and good intentions still pave the road to an unpleasant destination. It is only the bigotry of Progress that denies these durable truths.