Dear Rachel Maddow: How Often Should We Shake Hands With Mister Happy?

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Professor William Jacobson has accused you, Miss Maddow, of “sexualizing” Christine O’Donnell, which may elicit some unfortunate mental images, so let’s not go there, OK?

However, reasonable people of goodwill might wonder what political advantage you hoped to gain for the Progressive Wanker Community by calling attention to Miss O’Donnell’s youthful career as an advocate of sexual purity, to wit:

“We need to address sexuality with young people, and masturbation is part of sexuality, but it is important to discuss this from a moral point of view. . . . The Bible says that lust in your heart is committing adultery so — you can’t masturbate without lust.”
— Christine O’Donnell, 1996

Is there anything controversial about this? Do you, Miss Maddow, find anything factually wrong about Miss O’Donnell’s assertions? Perhaps you believe that we should not discuss sexuality “from a moral point of view.” Perhaps you think that masturbation without lust is possible. Do you think Americans don’t masturbate enough? Do they masturbate too much? Are we just not doing it the right way? Or is it possible that you think we have arrived at the Golden Age of Onanistic Indulgence?

Inquiring minds want to know, Miss Maddow, and you have a nightly television show where you are free to share your own views on the subject, given your evident interest in the Science of Self-Pleasure.

You should discuss this idea with your producers at MSNBC, as I’m sure that the Rachel Maddow Spank the Monkey Special would draw much higher ratings than anything Chris Matthews might say about his Obama-inspired leg thrills.

America awaits your helpful advice and thoughtful insights on the proper method and optimal frequency for pounding our puds or, as the case may be, buffing your muff.

You’ll have to excuse me now, Miss Maddow. As the AOSHQ gang would say, “I’ll be in my bunk.”

RINOplasty Reach ‘Round

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by Smitty

Stacy is rather tied down with impersonating a husband and father, so he asked for a special mid-week reach ’round for all of the absolutely sporting blogs who have made the last three days most righteous for traffic, indeed.
It looks like supporting the O’Donnell campaign took up a few posts:

In search of a something between a shout-out and a full-on FMJRA, please accept our gratitude in the form of a quick link.
This is exactly the sort of Army of Davids approach that will keep the Tokyo Roves knowing that the Dan Riehls and Ed Driscolls are having none of their crap.

Alarming News
Annoy The Left
Beregon’s Bar
Stix Blog
Caffeinated Thoughts
Conesrvative American News
Conservative Hideout
Cubachi
DaTechguy
Fishersville Mike
SI VIS PACEM
Obi’s Sister
Blog de King Shamus
Liberty Pundits
The Lonely Conservative
Michelle Malkin
Neo Sexist
Liberty		 Nice Deb
Ollieander
Republican Redefined
Ruby Slippers Blog
The Camp of the Saints
The Neo-Intellectual
Ric’s Rulez
All-American Blogger
Cassy Fiano
Conservatives For America
Marfdrat
Parc Bench
Political Byline
The Right Opinions
Uncoverage
VA Right
VMBBS

Technical aside: Fishersville Mike is the lone Blogger entry in this list. How is this blog configured, one wonders?

We cannot thank those who link us enough. It looks like the Ruling Class may be glomming onto the fact that the sleeping giant becomes conscious.

Please do not take offense at my sins of omission. Rather, take revenge on my inbox in time for the regular FMJRA.

Christine O’Donnell ‘Just Got Off the Phone With Senator Cornyn’

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DOVER,  Delaware — Christine O’Donnell is standing 20 feet away from me in the lobby of the Fairfield Inn. She says, “I just got off the phone with Senator Cornyn. He said he’s going to give us full support and is going to do media interviews clearing the air.”

Typing this on the lobby computer. What a way to get a scoop, huh?

I still say everybody ought to call the NRSC and tell ’em to eat a big ol’ plate of crow, but that’s just me.

Have You Called 202-675-6000 Yet?

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DOVER, Delaware — Checkout time is noon at the Fairfield Inn here — headquarters for the Christine O’Donnell campaign — and the lobby is fully of campaign staffers, reporters, producers, etc. Christine’s dad just bummed a smoke from me. He’s supposed to be quit, but on such an occasion, his daughter didn’t object to the old guy having a celebratory smoke.

What a night we had last night, huh? The final night of the primary season, and the Tea Party stuffed a torpedo right up John Cornyn’s tailpipe. Also, I got linked by Michelle Malkin.

Smoke ’em if you got ’em, I say.

Mike Castle is playing sore loser — RINOs never lose gracefully — but I’m far more troubled by reports that Cornyn and the National Republican Senatorial Committee won’t support O’Donnell. Their phone number is 202-675-6000, and I think they might need some friendly persuasion. IYKWIMAITYD.

Up in New York’s 23rd District, last word was that Doug Hoffman — the guy who started this whole year of wild Tea Party action — was losing by less than 500 votes to a rich-boy GOP establishment candidate. That hurts, especially because Hoffman’s former campaign manager Matt Moran was the big winner here with Christine last night.

On the bright side, Charles Lollar won the nomination to take on Steny Hoyer in Maryland’s 5th District. Semper fi, baby.

Everybody’s asking, “What does it mean?” There was a reporter here from the UK Guardian this morning who said that Christine’s victory is the hottest story in Europe now. I don’t yet claim to have obtained Final Wisdom as to the meaning of O’Donnell’s victory, but will remind you of something I said last week:

Do Delaware’s pro-lifers they know that Mike Castle gets only a 10% score from the National Right to Life Committee? Do these pro-life voters know that Mike Castle was one of only 11 Republicans who voted against a law that would have made it a federal crime to transport a minor across state lines for abortion without parental notification? . . .

One Catholic reporter argues that those pro-life voters made a difference, so don’t believe the media hype that social conservatives don’t matter for Tea Party candidates. From my column today for The American Spectator:

Christine O’Donnell did not merely defeat Mike Castle in Tuesday’s Senate primary. She beat the Republican establishment, both nationally and in Delaware, and she beat a veritable army of naysayers who said she couldn’t do it.
O’Donnell also beat a vicious negative attack campaign into which her Republican opponents dumped every bit of trash they could find. Yet this had no apparent effect on the Tea Party-backed, Sarah Palin-endorsed candidate, who won with 53 percent of the vote to Castle’s 47 percent. Her little-known Democratic opponent, Chris Coons, can’t possibly hit O’Donnell with anything worse than she got from the GOP establishment. . . .

Read the whole thing. And please hit the tip jar. Checkout time is noon, and I’m going home.

UPDATE: Maximum donation? Wow. That was quick. Blogs get results! But I think they need to give her triple-max, as an apology. Call 202-675-6000 and tell ’em what you think.

CHRISTINE O’DONNELL for U.S. SENATE

Of Course The Democrats Are Playing The Happy Tune In Delaware

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by Smitty

CNSNews “Christine O’Donnell’s Win Stuns Delaware Republicans But Thrills Democrats”. If Castle’s been in office since 1993, the Democrat party file on him must be of Michael Moore proportions. Now they have seven weeks to re-write their playbook. Chris Coons may have a pile of cash, but if Mike Castle can’t win a closed primary, exactly how indestructible would he have been against Coons? It’s all bluster, say I.
The ball is in the Tea Party court. The Ruling Class, Democrat and Republican, has bankrupted the country, and must be opposed on all fronts. Go, Delaware, and gimme George:

A Message For The GOP, Brought To You By Rick James

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by Smitty

It’s important to remember that the square roots of a house divided against itself cannot multiply. Michelle Malkin reports that Castle is showing just how worthy he was of any support:

A Rep. Mike Castle (R-Del.) campaign source confirmed to The Hill late Tuesday that the longtime congressman will not be endorsing Christine O’Donnell.

More at Hot Air, where the NRSC is sporting stage 5 cranial rectalitis:

They’re trying to limit the damage from the race but they’re only going to end up expanding it, and to pull the plug on her when she’s literally in the middle of her victory speech will stick in the craw of righties nationwide who are excited by her win. Just spend what you have to spend on her to give her a fair chance of winning, which is unlikely but possible. If you shortchange her, you only alienate people you need in November.

Get bent, ye sore losers. Rick James explains what the GOP requires:

Unity:
Brother, sister,
There’s got to be,
Uuuuuuniiiiiity.
Yeeeeeeahhh.
Unity.
Unity’s what missing in our
Liiiiiiiiiives.
Can’t you see?
Wee need looooooove.
A little word of confidence.
Every now and then.
A little hoooonesty,
And trust among us.
A little love and harmony,
And there’ll surely be,
Some unity,
Unity,
Unity.
(Unity)

On the other hand:
Via Daniel Foster,

–CNN’s Mark Preston quotes an unnamed GOP official: “Until she demonstrates some viability in the polls we are not going to have any money for her.” The official said it is now incumbent on Jim DeMint, Sarah Palin, and the Tea Party Express to support O’Donnell. “They got her here.”

Hey, that’s just the kind of idiocy that brought you the national debt and budget deficit. Thanks, unnamed GOP [censored].

Also, one hopes the Progressive notion that the Tea Parties are some GOP sock puppet has been retired. The Ruling Class had better re-read the first three words of the Constitution, for those eleven letters are key.

Dan Riehl seems to be having some difficulties with Karl Rove. How long until we see a Downfall parody with Karl Rove in the ‘Stache chair?

Christine O’Donnell Victory Interview

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DOVER, Delaware — It was after 11 a.m. when I finally got my turn to interview the Republican Cinderella:

Unlike in our previous interview, she wouldn’t don the fedora — “No funny hats,” her advisers said — but maybe she’ll agree when we cover her inauguration. (Joe Biden would do the swearing-in.) Meanwhile, do like she said: Hit my tip jar and then hit hers.

Now some quick headlines:

Among the blogs that did link here Tuesday night: Obi’s Sister, Bob Belvedere, If You Seek Peace, Sissy Willis, Ruby Slippers, Fisherville Mike and the Lonely Conservative. Excuse me for not getting everybody on that list, but it’s 3 a.m. here and I’m exhausted. Will try to get more in the morning, before I drive back home.

UPDATE: Here’s the instantly notorious video of Karl Rove trashing Christine on Hannity’s Fox show:

These “smartest-guy-in-the-room” types can’t stand it when they’re wrong.

Did I say “wrong”? Yeah. Like when Karl Rove’s genius plan for the “Permanent Republican Majority” gave us Speaker Pelosi, Majority Leader Reid and President Obama.