We Need a Word

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by Smitty

We need a word for that special sort of inspiration found when a blog that had seemingly fallen off the radar comes back with a pitch-perfect, palate cleansing blast of righteousness (potty mouth tidied):

Did I tell you guys I had to switch jobs again? Yeah, the powers that be decided my career would be benefited more if I became a Section Chief. So they put me back in the f*****g office. Little do they know, I couldn’t give two s***s about my career and I’m just trying to last these last two years until I retire without slitting someone’s throat.

Bob, welcome back. Your dreams were your ticket out, and your posts were ours. Read the whole NSFW thing.

Roll Tide: The Universal Greeting

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Like aloha or shalom, “Roll Tide” is a phrase of tremendous cultural nuance. Thursday night, after the ‘Bama Championship Show, my Burbank host JSF and I took a stroll through the streets of downtown Pasadena, crowded with fans celebrating the Crimson Tide’s glorious victory.

Everyone was wearing crimson, while many of the ladies were stylishly accessorized in black-and-white houndstooth (if I have to explain what houndstooth means to a ‘Bama fan, you’re reading the wrong blog). And wherever they encountered each other, the signifier of recognition was shouted: “Roll Tide!” Here are a couple of enthusiastic coeds from Tuscaloosa:

And here is a video, for which I must apologize as being so dimly lit, but listen to this fan’s humorous narrative of the season followed by the classic Alabama kickoff cheer:

Here are more photos from this week’s trip:

With son James at Dulles Airport, prior to departure Tuesday.

The front desk at the Westin Hotel in Costa Mesa which was the Crimson Tide’s BCS HQ.

Wednesday morning, my Twitter buddy Brittany Cohan met Donald Douglas and I in Costa Mesa and proved quite helpful at soliciting information about the Crimson Tide’s practice schedule.

Texas fans Wednesday at the Rose Bowl — they were in a cheerful mood prior to Thursday’s unstoppable onslaught of the Crimson QB Crushers.

This is Don, whom I met in the lobby of the Newport Beach Marriott. Don is a conservative blog reader who was overjoyed with surprise to discover that The Other McCain was in California for the big game.

Wednesday, outside the BCS media headquarters at the Newport Beach Marriott. The banner said, “Welcome Media,” which did not necessarily mean that they were going to give me credentials.

Being turned down for credentials didn’t prevent me from setting up the Sports Desk in the media hospitality suite in Newport Beach and poaching official BCS WiFi.

Hanging out with a sports writer for the Tuscaloosa paper at Wednesday’s media reception in Newport Beach. The BCS denied me credentials, but they couldn’t stop me from crashing their reception. (Suggestion to BCS fascists: Next year, have Department of Homeland Security protecting the buffet.)

With Brittany Cohan and Jenny Erikson at the Wednesday night pre-game blogger meetup in Redondo Beach.

An anonymous Alabama fan at Wednesday’s blogger meetup illustrates a shocking modification of the “Hook ‘Em Horns” symbol. He said, “This is for Nancy Pelosi,” whatever that means . . .

Jenny Erikson and Baldilocks at Wednesday’s blogger meetup, where they were equally oppressed by my corny jokes.

Friday morning, on JSF’s balcony in Burbank.

California Highway Patrol officers Friday afternoon at the Westin in Costa Mesa, waiting to escort the triumphant Tide to the airport for their victorious return to God’s Country.

Now, I’m en route to a Tea Party event in Altadena, before catching my flight back to Washington. ROLL TIDE! HIT THE TIP JAR! And in commemoration of this spectacular occasion, here is special music from the Leningrad Cowboys featuring the Red Army Choir:

Fabulous McCain Journalism Refreshes Alabama

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by Smitty

Stacy’s still off getting his Gonzo on. I’ve been minding the shop, in my Geekzo fashion. This involved raising Stacy’s blood pressure significantly on at least one occasion, but I think that the peace offerings that await his return may prove sufficient. Also, for the Paco’s and Belvederes who aren’t in this yet, I’ll have to come back tomorrow night, as duty calls.

Kn@ppster, one of those hand-wringers, was busting our chops about whether this move is really buying us anything. See the Technical Section at the end of this post.

Also, The Indentured Servant Girl thinks herself funny. Everyone likes a little dustbroom, but no one likes a little wise dustbroom, if we’re communicating, and I think we may be. 😉

Your FMJRA, then:
1773 VIDEO: Molly Far Has Yet Another Terrifying Vision
Liber Ex Machina linked the Molly Far videos. And I discover a new blog.

VIDEO: Behind the Making of TheOtherMcCain.com
ubervu has the Twitter feed.
Political Byline scoffed.
Little Miss Attila thought us blotto.
Ruby Slippers noted that we missed the best films of the decade.
Da Tech Guy
In Mala Fide noted us in their FMJRA/Rule 5 outing.

Tabitha Hale Proclaims the Year of the Citizen
Obi’s Sister liked my Tabitha Hale link. Haven’t heard anything more about the SOU.

The Nebulous Alan Colmes
Red State thought that Alan Colmes had a Peter Jennings moment.

Band at JSU Banned at LGF:
Time for a Neo-Confederate Music Fest!
ubervu has the Twitter feed.
Da Tech Guy chipped in.
Gateway Pundit linked us, too.

Roger Scruton: ‘Our World Has Turned Its Back on Beauty . . .’
In Mala Fide liked our linkage.

Interviewed at JIP
The Lonely Conservative: “On a lighter note, Jumping in Pools interviewed the fabulously fabulous Smitty from The Other McCain who has some decent advice for bloggers.”
Obi’s Sister quote of the day!

Security Breach at Newark Airport
American Glob linked us in a brief roundup.

Join Coach McCain’s Winning Team
Trainwife1962 is a determined fan both of Stacy and of No Sheeples Here.

The Apocalypse of Culture: People Spend $1 Billion to See Sucky 3-D SciFi Movie
ubervu brings the Twitter.
Da Tech Guy nominates Stacy as one of the Four Horsemen.
American Digest where we get linked by the legendary Gerard.
CK MacLeod picks us us up at the Green Room.

Obama Discriminates Against Foreigners
ubervu brings the Tweets.
The Lonely Conservative picked it up.

Brief Technical Note
Dustbury commiserates: “I finally persuaded this ancient theme to accept up-to-the-minute widgets, whereupon I discovered that the widgets I might have actually used, I’ve already essentially duplicated in the sidebar the old-fashioned way.”

The State of California, devastated by the recent visitation, seeks federal bailout…
Just Printed My Boarding Pass; Ready for Fear and Loathing in Pasadena?
Twitter track
POWIP like the linkage: “Nor am I at all upset by Robert Stacy McCain’s attempt to associate my name with the expression “chubby chaser” in search engines.”

Yes, I Am This Crazy . . .
POWIP rogered up.

Pasadena Reconnaisance Report
uberview really enjoys Twitter.
Rhetorican confessed to Texas sympathies.

Live: The Triumph of the Tide!
The Big Ubervu Twitter Roundup
Obi’s Sister linked here and put in the Frozen Gore.
The Lonely Conservative fishes for linkage, scores.
Outside the Beltway noted Stacy’s liveblog.
That’s Right had Rule 5 and linkage.
Da Tech Guy echoes my general non-command of sports enthusiasm.

Andrew, You Are Forgiven
AmSpec had a post by Stacy linking my work. Incestuous, I know.
Instalanche!
Da Tech Guy also echoed the post.

Are Vampire Masks Racist? Also: How Bad Does David Brooks Suck?
ubervu for Twitter justice.

Obama’s ‘Amateur Hour’
Obi’s Sister noted Stacy’s post and cautions against premature celebration.

Put A Price On Buffoonery Instead
The Lonely Conservative liked the Frozen Gore clip.

‘We Were Very Lucky’
Around the Sphere had Tucker in a Snuggie.
Balloon Juice thinks we say a lot of crazy things. I hope for more Lefty feedback, as it spices these posts.

This is our new FMJRA prototype. There aren’t too many like it, given our mad stylings. Please give us more linky-love, and email corrections to Smitty

Irrespective of any other excitement, having an SQL interface to peek at the blog is more tractable than the GData API on blogger, with which I never made much progress.

XML is to bulk data management what Progressivism is to politics: dogs that seem robust from a distance but which don’t quite hunt.

Technical section:
Watch me hire some clone bots to do the boring part of gathering the FMJRA, so that I can focus on content. And, no, this isn’t a “finished product”. These things always get weirder with time.

SELECT     B.ID
         , 0                     AS grouper
         , CONCAT( ''
                 , B.post_title
                 , '' )      AS our_URL
         , ''                    AS their_URL
         , curdate( )            AS comment_date
FROM       wp_posts              B
     WHERE B.comment_count > 0
       AND B.post_date
   BETWEEN DATE_SUB( curdate( ) , INTERVAL 1 WEEK )
       AND curdate( )
UNION ALL
SELECT     B.ID
         , 1
         , A.comment_type
         , CONCAT( 'a' )
                 , A.comment_date
FROM       wp_comments           A
INNER JOIN wp_posts              B ON A.comment_post_id = B.ID
     WHERE A.comment_type <> ''
       AND B.post_date
   BETWEEN DATE_SUB( curdate( ) , INTERVAL 1 WEEK )
       AND curdate( )
ORDER BY   1, 2, 5

The View Out My Window

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HOLLYWOOD, Calif.
No, I’m not going the Sully route, and I’m too lazy to upload a photo, but the view out my window tonight is beautiful. It’s a clear night, about 70 degrees outside, and the lights of Los Angeles stretch off in the distance as far as the eye can see.

Tuesday night, I crashed on Donald Douglas‘s sofa in Orange County. Wednesday night, I crashed in Mike Flynn‘s hotel room in Redondo Beach. Last night, I crashed on the sofa of JSF‘s apartment in Burbank. Tonight, I’m in the guest bedroom of a home high up in the hills near Griffith Park. They tell me LL Cool J lives just down the street. And the view is spectacular. 

The gracious lady who owns this house fixed a delicious dinner of roast chicken and potatoes, with apple cake and coffee for dessert. (This being Hollywood, it was fair-trade organic coffee.) When I think back to Tuesday, and how depressed I was before leaving . . .

Why do I worry? Why don’t I have faith? Do you remember how this trip started? It was Dec. 6, and Alabama had just beaten Fl0rida for the SEC title:

Could I possibly rattle the tip-jar
hard enough to get to Pasadena?
I doubt it. As much as I’d like to go cover Alabama vs. Texas in the BCS game, I simply don’t think our readers would hit the tip jar to fund such a trip . . .

So much for my doubts, and despite being denied media credentials by the collegiate football oligarchs — fascists! — this has been a remarkably successful and productive trip. Not only did the Crimson Tide win the national world cosmic football championship, but readers proved once again that they are capable of supporting journalism, even when it’s merely a gonzo whim.

That was the fundamental challenge of Fear and Loathing in Pasadena. Sure, you had hit the tip jar for my shoe-leather trips to report IG-Gate, to cover the Sparkman case in Kentucky, the Hoffman campaign in NY-23 and the final stop of the Tea Party Express. But that was political news. Flying to California to cover the college football championship?

Crazy idea. Dan Collins, you magnificent bastard. If blog readers would support something as crazy as this, anything is possible. This was a demonstration of the latent grassroots power of the blogosphere.

Tomorrow — er, today, Saturday — I’ll be covering a Tea Party event in Altadena (if you’re in the L.A. area and you’re not a beady-eyed jerkoff, you need to be there) with several of the people Baldilocks named. Then I fly back home to Mrs. Other McCain and the six children. And then . . .

Well, there’s a Senate race in Massachusetts that’s making news. Maybe Mrs. Other McCain wouldn’t mind my heading up there Tuesday or Wednesday and staying through Election Day Jan. 19, or as long as the tip-jar keeps clinking. If you want me to go cover that story, let’s get started now, IYKWIMAITYD.

Crimson Tide Heading Back
to Sweet Home Alabama

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COSTA MESA, Calif. — National Champions depart for the airport:

On the video you hear the Westin Hotel guard acknowledge that the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) was providing protection for the Crimson Tide during their stay in Southern California, just as US Customs and Border Protection was guarding the Rose Bowl during the BCS.

Deploying the Department of Homeland Security (DHS) in defense of Alabama’s football team strikes me as a waste of taxpayers’ money. If Alabama could beat Texas, they could defeat al Qaeda. In fact, Coach Saban may want to send The Tide to Yemen for spring practice. The ‘Bama defense made Tebow cry, then they knocked out McCoy. For their next trick, the can tackle Anwar al-Awlaki.

This mad scheme to destroy the terrorists was hatched Wednesday at a gathering of bloggers in Redodo Beach led by notorious neo-con Donald Douglas of American Power blog. Thanks to JSF for providing the neutral, objective analysis in the video.

Kudos:

No Sheeples Here for support above and beyond the call of sanity.
No Sheeples Here
No Sheeples Here rocks Alabama
Dan Collins for putting Stacy up to the trip. Mrs. The Other McCain will reward you separately, assuming you remain within the 48 contiguous states. This does not constitute a legal notice.
Piece of Work in Progress
Piece of Work in Progress hatches gonzo schemes.
(Note from Smitty: this post reprises our madcap video of trying to un-b0rk Stacy’s left-leaning post. He’s dictated it over the phone, and I’ve done my best penance to capture his words, after wrecking the site for a little while this afternoon.)

Charles Johnson: ‘A Fat, Bloated, Beady-Eyed Jerkoff’

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So says Zip of Weasel Zippers, describing with brutal objectivity the subject of a puff-piece column in today’s Los Angeles Times. (Via Memeorandum.)

Smitty may have more to say about this later. I’m in Costa Mesa this afternoon with JSF of Valley of the Shadow, and just wanted to get up a quick note about this. I woke up at 6 a.m. today on JSF’s sofa in Burbank and went for breakfast at Eat N’ Park (“Best Omelettes in Burbank”), picked up the paper to see their coverage of the ‘Bama Championship Show and — wham! — here was 1,200 words of journalistic fellatio.

The MSM knows who their friends are, and so Johnson’s self-serving version of his departure from the Right sanity is given no critical scrutiny by L.A. Times columnist James Rainey.

Hey, James: Why didn’t you ask Charles about his vicious attacks on Pamela Geller, Robert Spencer and other anti-jihad bloggers? Better yet, James, why not ask Pamela and Robert themselves? They’re not nearly as reclusive as the paranoid agoraphobic wanker you managed to interview in person.

Exit question: Why is the media biased against Alabama?

UPDATE: JSF points out the Whiskey Tango Foxtrot factor: Of all the bloggers in L.A., why did Rainey decide to profile Johnson?