Yeah, I stole the “sacred honor” thing from Ace. Crucify me. He’s taking the day off and missed the latest development, so I’m forced to imagine how Ace would headline it:
Will Folks: Sacred Honor Compels Me to Drop More Hints That Might Look Like Threats But I’m a Southern Gentleman — and, Oh, By the Way, Nikki Haley Tried to Break Up My Marriage
Or something like that:
What these text messages did not show, however, was the two weeks of pure hell that my wife and I went through prior to deciding that this was an issue that needed to be addressed preemptively on my website. Literally every day during those two weeks there was a new report of some different piece of evidence allegedly being leaked to this reporter or that reporter, and based on what I knew to be true (and based on one specific piece of evidence that I had seen with my own eyes a year earlier) I could not be sure that a story exposing the relationship wasn’t going to run.
We were under seige, and we did what we felt we had to do to protect our two-year marriage – a union that never would have transpired had Rep. Haley had her way, incidentally.
Got all that? Not just the “Nikki tried to break up my engagement so she could keep me as her exclusive love-slave” angle, but notice how Will Folks once again reiterates his nonsensical rationale for “deciding that this was an issue that needed to be addressed preemptively on my website.”
As if repeating it again will make it more credible.
This is the one part of the story that has never made any sense from Day One. On the basis of a couple of inquiries from reporters asking about the rumor — that is, the rumor that Will Folks himself had been spreading for two years — he suddenly feels the need to “admit” the rumored affair on his own Web site.
Because that’s going to save his marriage.
But wait, there’s much, much more:
I am releasing all the information I can as soon as it is authenticated and approved for disemmination by my attorneys . .
(He can’t spell “dissemination,” but let’s not nitpick.)
Will so-called “smoking guns” be released prior to primary day? Prior to the runoff? Prior to the general election?
That’s honestly not up to me. It’s up to what my team is able to positively authenticate in anticipation of facing a blizzard of denials . . .
Like I said, we will continue to release what we can, when we can – fully condident that the truth regarding this situation will eventually come out.
Speaking of which, in addition to these records, my team is preparing affidavits from literally dozens of witnesses – including several who observed Rep. Haley and I leaving nightclubs together late at night as well as several who will testify to seeing Rep. Haley’s car parked outside of my downtown Columbia, S.C. town house on mulitple occasions at all hours of the night during the time frame in question. I’ve been told that several of these witnesses have taken the step of contacting members of the mainstream media regarding what they saw, although I obviously can’t control when (or how) that side of the story will come out.
Regarding these late night visits to my town house, at this point it bears repeating that I have purposely refrained from discussing the physical details of my relationship with Rep. Haley. Believe it or not, I am a Southern gentleman and at the point when I felt that public disclosure of this relationship was imminent, I phrased my admission in a manner consistent with the belief that what transpired between us was nobody’s business but ours and those individuals we chose to share it with.
Quick, somebody look up “unmitigated gall” and see if Webster has got the picture of Will Folks there yet. The man has a Sullivanesque lack of self-awareness. He can’t see that his entire course of conduct since May 24 directly contradicts his own story of why he needed to do “what we felt we had to do to protect our two-year marriage.”
Whereas he says he dreadfully feared that “public disclosure of this relationship was imminent,” Will Folks has spent the past two weeks asserting that he has evidence that will prove the relationship actually happened — and he hasn’t proven jack. So if Will the Irresistible Seducer can’t prove his own conquests, why was he so afraid that some reporter was going to report the rumor?
And why has he gone from victimized defendant to prosecuting attorney?
That’s what’s so damned suspicious, this sudden zeal to prove something happened between him and Haley. It just doesn’t pass the sniff test.
But never mind, says Will Folks, “my team” is working night and day to “positively authenticate” that smoking-gun proof of the dreaded rumor that struck terror in his heart for two weeks.
I’m sure Ace of Spades will soon weigh in, so you won’t have to endure any more pale-imitation Ace-ness from me.
