Nap-Time Tales of Net Neutrality

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I am on record as declaring “Net Neutrality” as The Most Boring Policy Debate in History. However, it appears that Warner Todd Huston was able to score a large enough supply of pure methamphetamine to keep him awake while he sorted through all the recent Net Neutrality news, including this scary headline:

Draft of Waxman’s net-neutrality
legislation leaked amid talks

Oh, great. So now the intense soporific effect caused by having to think about Net Neutrality — it’s a struggle not to nod off before I finish typing this sentence — is combined with the horrific mental image of Henry Waxman.

NIGHTMARES of NOSTRILDAMUS!

Better grab some some more coffee . . .

CHUCK WILKERSON for U.S. CONGRESS

Awesome! Ace of Spades Gets in Touch With His Inner Social Conservative

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Admittedly, a social conservative famous for slinging f-bombs and sodomy jokes, but a social conservative nonetheless:

This was just evil for evil’s sake. She wanted to be even more famous than she is (and she is already quite a bit more famous than her present, but very limited, talents would recommend), and she decided to grab at that on the backs of tweener girls, already immersed in a culture that tells them virgins are weird and having sex is what the cool, popular kids do, with almost no pushback against this message at all. . . .

Read the whole thing. Ace is talking about Katy Perry’s latest sexed-up hit song and even manages to throw in some cleverly relevant references to Christine the Teenage Witch (Who Doesn’t Like Wankers).

Michele Bachmann Endorses Joe Miller

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by Smitty (h/t Libertarian Republican)


This blog hopes that by 2014 Minnesota has found a suitable replacement for Michele Bachman, so that she can do her Nancy Sinatra impression using Al Franken as a mat.
Wouldn’t that be the campaign ad of justice? Michele in boots working out to Nancy, standing on a life size photo of Franken? Maybe just walking toward it would be in better taste. . .

Scapegoating Progressive Bloggers for the Obama Administration’s Failures?

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Just when you think Democrats could not possibly become more absurd, they surprise you:

With each passing day, I’m beginning to realize that the crux of the problem for Obama is a handful of prominent progressive bloggers, among them Glenn Greenwald, John Aravosis, Digby, Marcy Wheeler and Jane Hamsher.

That’s from liberal New Media guru Peter Dauo, who evidently doesn’t realize how ridiculous that sentence looks to sane people.

Here we have a president who promised that his election would mark “the moment when we began to provide care for the sick and good jobs to the jobless . . . the moment when the rise of the oceans began to slow and our planet began to heal.”

Not exactly modest in his promises, was he?

What he delivered instead is record levels of deficit spending and unemployment that seems to be permanently stuck near 10 percent.

Yet despite the myriad failures of the Obama administration, Peter Dauo insists, “the crux of the problem . . . is a handful of prominent progressive bloggers.”

On behalf of the Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy, I would like to offer this message of comfort and solidarity to Glenn Greenwald, John Aravosis, Digby, Marcy Wheeler and Jane Hamsher . . . Continue reading Scapegoating Progressive Bloggers for the Obama Administration’s Failures? →

LIVE AT FIVE 09.28.10

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TOP NEWS

Kim Jong-un, next head of North Korea?

Kim Jong-il Appoints Heir Apparent General
Second son of “Dear Leader” now NKPA general; experts regard this as more proof that he’s next in line.

Rahm Emanuel Likely to Leave White House This Week
Rats, sinking ship, etc…also close to decision on run for mayor of Chicago.

Pentagon on Stuxnet Worm Afflicting Iran: “No Comment”
Who, us?

CIA Steps Up Drone Attacks In Pakistan
Taliban women, minorities hardest hit

POLITICS

VP Biden to Democratic Base: Stop Whining
Obama & Biden Plead for help from student-age voters
Local taxes affect Congressional elections

THE ECONOMY, STUPID
Southwest Airlines Shells Out $1.4 Billion For AirTran
Asian Markets Drop After Profit-Taking
Maker of BlackBerry Introduces Tablet
E-Books No Bargain For Authors

SPORTS

Roy Halliday and Jayson Werth celebrate

Phillies Crush Nats 8-0, Clinch NL East

Cleveland Still Steaming Over LeBron James’ Departure

Colts Prez Sez: 18-game Season Is “Done Deal”

FAMOUS FOR BEING FAMOUS

Christina Aguilera at the LACMA event

Christina Aguilera: More curves than ever?

Swift in for Lohan? Not so fast, says Swift

George Lopez and wife to divorce after 17 years

FOREIGNERS

Venezuelan opposition gains power in National Assembly

United opposition can now block Chavez

Irish, Portuguese Rock The EU Boat

Germany to phase out conscription, return to all-volunteer professional army

Iraqi guerrillas continue to be revolting

BLOGS & STUFF

“They told me that if I voted for John McCain…”

Astroturfing USA

Speaking of Astroturf, how about that Coffee Party convention?

Alan Grayson Is Not Scum

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Allan Grayson is the disease-causing bacteria which infect the parasitical worms found in putrid diarrhetic feces oozing from the rectums of scavengers that prey upon maggots which grow in the decaying carcasses of poisonous vipers that die after eating insects which consume tainted scum.

(This has been a public service announcement from Floridians Against the Defamation of Scum.)

DANIEL WEBSTER
for U.S. CONGRESS

UPDATE: Michael Moynihan asks, “Is Alan Grayson the most loathsome member of Congress?” Is that even a question?

Investigating how this anti-social creep got to Congress, I discovered that a Republican who had pledged to serve only four terms in office broke that promise and ran again in 2008, barely won the GOP primary, and subsequently lost to Grayson.

Which is to say that, like Charlie Crist, we can blame Grayson on the Republican Party of Florida. Also, this is the 8th District, which includes Disney World, where some people earn a living being Goofy.

My Sincere Apology . . .

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. . . to members of the Brain-Damaged American community and the people who love them.

Some of my best friends are brain damaged and, in point of fact, several experts have theorized that brain damage — perhaps caused by unfortunate adolescent habits — may explain why I occasionally act like the sixth-grade smart-aleck I used to be.

The lingering after-effects of teenage brain damage could be the reason why, when someone Tweeted a link to a feature story about Bill Clinton’s Sunday campaign rally for Barney Frank, I was unable to resist the urge to supply an appropriate headline. Continue reading My Sincere Apology . . . →